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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask cleaner why she is being so off with me?

108 replies

TrinidadQueen · 26/09/2021 21:52

She can't look me in the eye.
Is rude in texts. Not saying hi just saying 'That's fine.'etc.

I have asked her to work shorter hours this week but made it clear she will have more next week. I have also let her know the schedule late but explained that was because of my own workplace letting me know late. I know she is experiencing some health issues and do wonder if it is spilling into work. Although I have already told her she can work less hours if needed, she did not seem keen on this idea.
Just not sure how to approach this.

OP posts:
Leibham · 27/09/2021 00:40

Expecting her to make up the hours this week another time is very cheeky.

HarrisonStickle · 27/09/2021 01:01

If you've asked her to work shorter hours this week then that's on you and you should pay her as usual and not try and add on hours another time.

LowbrowVictoriana · 27/09/2021 01:35

You cut her hours - last minute, too - then it’s on her to make it up again!

Jeez, I’m surprised she hasn’t just told you to piss off.

Monty27 · 27/09/2021 01:48

I hope the supermarket and utility people understand when she doesn't have money to pay them. You do have a duty of care

Tooembarrassingtomention · 27/09/2021 02:07

Are you paying her for the shorter hours?

Tooembarrassingtomention · 27/09/2021 02:11

Lets say Have 40 working hours in my week

I book out 40 hours a week. I am fully booked and in demand

Someone calls we and say they dont want my 5 hours for them next week but I can do it the following week

Too late to get extra 5 hours next week. The week after I dont have 5 hours free to book extra time in.I loose 5 hours pay.

PurpleSapphire · 27/09/2021 02:43

You dont say if she's on any kind of top up benefit, help with rent etc but if she is, messing around with her hours could cause her all sorts of hassle and actually make her worse off. Could be that.

Bellyups · 27/09/2021 02:55

Pay her for the hours she would normally work.
Do not tell her she can work longer hours next week to make up ConfusedConfusedConfused

londonrach · 27/09/2021 02:55

Yabu. The rude one is you. I wouldn't be surprised if the cleaner sacks you. Cleaners have set hours and clients.

Twolostsoulsswimminginafishbow · 27/09/2021 03:29

Unless there’s a huge drip feed coming saying you’ve always both agreed to her working different hours each week then that’ll be why she’s pissed off.
I cleaned years ago and if you’d done that to me I wouldn’t come back. Good, honest reliable cleaners are very hard to find. If a client became unreasonable I never found it difficult to fill their slot and turned quite a lot down.

FortunesFave · 27/09/2021 04:45

It doesn't matter if 'you made it clear' she'd get more hours next week...that's NEXT WEEK and it messes up her income.

HarebrightCedarmoon · 27/09/2021 04:53

You sound like her employer rather than her client.

beautifullymad · 27/09/2021 07:28

If you would like her to work less this week and more the next, you pay her for her normal hours this week. And, pay her extra for her extra hours next week.

You can't be changing her hours and pay without consultation. It's just rude.

You can't assume she can afford not to work those hours, you can't assume she can pick up extra to cover those hours. This is your choice not hers, so she should be compensated appropriately.

I cleaned for a year when I left a difficult relationship as it fitted around small children and suited me at that time.

I had one lady who thought nothing of telling me she only needed x hours that day if she'd been able to do a bit herself. She didn't factor my drive to her into her thoughts, my time and petrol travelling and my pay being down x amount of hours. I couldn't easily take on another slot without major replanning of my working week.

I was so cross. I left after the second time she pulled that stunt and found another nice family to fill the slot. She was quite upset and kept sending me texts asking for me to return. But I could afford a flaky Cleaning position.

When you are on benefits you have to earn a set amount and deposit it into your account, otherwise you don't get your benefits and your children suffer. It's very black and white.

Don't mess with the cleaner!

I now have my own cleaner and always pay well and fairly.

Ps, OP, make sure you put aside a decent Christmas bonus for her to make up for this.

PooWillyNameChange · 27/09/2021 07:31

If I had to cut my cleaners hours this week I'd pay her for them then offer her more hours next week if I needed them. How would you like to be messed around like that?

Vodka1 · 27/09/2021 07:38

I'm not sure you just bank her free time to suit yourself.

If you don't need her this week then you tell her this & pay her the same.

Next week she may miss something but she really shouldn't have to work extra just because your commitments changed temporarily.

Let her have the couple hours pay. And if you need her longer next week you should ASK her if she can, for the standard rate of course.

Sorry op but YABU

Strawbsaturno · 27/09/2021 07:46

What everyone else says…
Usually with a cleaner you buy their time in set hours, ie 1hour or 2 hrs a week. This is so they can plan their jobs and route around customers. Mine probably wouldn’t be able to agree switching hours around, as we all have regular slots.

Loudestcat14 · 27/09/2021 07:46

How much notice did you give her that you were cutting her hours this week? If it was only a few days you should pay her for her normal hours.

Loudestcat14 · 27/09/2021 07:47

Also, good cleaners are so hard to come by so if she sacks you off for dicking her around you've only got yourself to blame when you're having to clean the loo yourself!

Frogsandsheep · 27/09/2021 07:47

Yanbu

There is no excuse for rudeness. If she is unhappy with you she should say something. Blanking someone or deliberately changing the tone of text messages is rude.

IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves · 27/09/2021 07:49

Did she have this attitude before or after you cut her hours and messed her about?

QueenoftheKarens · 27/09/2021 07:50

YABU. Stop messing with her hours, she has other clients to fit you in around. I would be pissed off too.

Loudestcat14 · 27/09/2021 07:54

@Frogsandsheep

Yanbu

There is no excuse for rudeness. If she is unhappy with you she should say something. Blanking someone or deliberately changing the tone of text messages is rude.

I think if someone was messing around with my livelihood at a moment's notice I'd be a bit short and snippy with them too. Given how casually OP has cut her hours, maybe the cleaner feels she can't say anything for fear of being sacked?
icedcoffees · 27/09/2021 07:56

@Frogsandsheep

Yanbu

There is no excuse for rudeness. If she is unhappy with you she should say something. Blanking someone or deliberately changing the tone of text messages is rude.

Maybe OP shouldn't dick her around by changing her hours at the last minute and telling her she can "make up for it next week" Hmm
Frogsandsheep · 27/09/2021 07:56

@Loudestcat14

We don’t know whether they have a flexible arrangement or whether she was still paid the same for this week.
I think there are many ways to deal with work related issues and blatant rudeness isn’t one of them.

Frogsandsheep · 27/09/2021 07:57

@icedcoffees

See my comment above - we don’t know about their usual arrangements/ pay/ flexibility etc. If the cleaner is that unhappy then she could dump OP as a client. Blanking someone and passive aggressive texts are rude and unnecessary.