To ask what you all did for your big 40

[SidSparrow]

Curious to know if I'm alone in having one of the worst birthdays ever! It was as special as a wet fart. It feels like the big 40 is something people really celebrate - is it?

Nothing I can remember. Probably a meal out with husband and tea and cake with the kids

Mine was just as 1st lockdown lifted, so I went to the pub with my OH & my another couple, eating out to help out.

I was renting a house for 20 friends & I for a long party weekend but that went out the window when Covid made an appearance 5 months earlier. Fortunately I hadn’t yet paid the deposit.

I knew this year the summer would all be about people getting together with family and/or people might still be wary of large groups, so next year it’s on. 42 is the new 40 dontcha know

I had a miscarriage the week before and a d&c two days after (medical management failed). Had to cancel all plans. It was a lesson in not getting so hooked up on the milestones...

I spent my 40th birthday weekend in Edinburgh and had afternoon tea at the Balmoral Hotel.

I went to Vienna for my 30th but it was just after my actual birthday.

Hoping to go to Berlin for my 50th.

Went to Marrakesh for 3 nights and walked in the Atlas Mountains whilst MIL looked after the kids. It was f-ing awesome!!

Went camping for the weekend with my fabulous friends. The sun shone, the wine flowed and it was marvellous. Then as a gift to myself I ended my shitty marriage and went on a spa weekend!

Went to a fabulous Italian restaurant. Then a few weeks later we went to NY for the half term holiday with dds. It was bloody cold as it was February half term. We did the sights though.

I’m not a party person at all, so we did a weekend in a posh hotel, just for the two of us, including dinner at a Michelin starred restaurant.

Spent mine in Copenhagen.

@Hattie765 what exactly about my response isn’t appropriate?!!! She asked me what I did on my 40th and I told her?!!! This seems to be the point of the thread and what everyone else has written?

On my 40th birthday it was my first official day as a mum! We brought our adopted ds home the day before and the first time he woke up in our home was my 40th birthday. Best birthday present ever!

Went on holiday to Vietnam and Thailand.

Though to even it out my 50th was spent having a takeaway during lockdown.

I had a party.
My dh wanted to do something special, as did my mum, I have work friends, school friends and friends I’ve met through having the kids and knew that having separate nights out would be expensive so I booked a party so that everyone could celebrate together on the one night.

I’d never had a party before and I had a blast!

Fuck all it was during the second lockdown.

My 39th was during the first.

I'm not bitter though. Nope, not a bit.

Sorry hit post too soon!

What I was supposed to do:

• Cycling holiday to Lanzarote with the girls.
• New York with DH and DS.

Left kids & DH at home. Went to Amalfi coast with my best friends. Drank prosecco, ate pastries, laid around on sun loungers looking fabulous (in my minds eye at least).

I went on a city break.

my 30th was grim as only my mother remembered it

I had not long had a baby so went for Afternoon Tea with 5 people (and baby). Lovely and no pressure.

DH and I turned 40 in the same year and made the celebrations last all year - I won’t go into details as it’s outing but we went away together, did something with our families, did weekend away with friends separately, did lunch with friends of different groups, had a joint party, had a day out together on each of our birthdays.
Basically milked it and loved it.
It was an expensive year but we spent most of the preceding decade neglecting ourselves that we saved for this time and glad that we did.
Most people love a good excuse for a celebration BUT you need to make the effort to sort your own birthday events out - except in the case of husband/wife when I would expect them to organise something nice for you.

It did turn out cheaper than if our birthdays were in different years - several of the events were joint celebrations so won’t be repeated until our 50ths

On my actual 40th, not much, at home with DH and kids..Nice gifts and dinner.
But I had a bit of a carnival type celebration so a week of nice lunches/drinks with colleagues and friends. Since then I have a birthday carnival week .
And then my gift from DH was driving a car really, really fast around a race track. My cheeks were sore from grinning, it was awesome 👌.

I think my 'big' birthdays are destined to all be a bit shit.

40th- had just been told I'd lost my job. Hated all the people I worked with anyway but had to keep going in until my official last day as I needed the money and wasn't sure when I'd get another job. DH offered to cook me a nice dinner but I knew he was knackered as he'd just taken a second job to try to get a bit of cash to tide us over. So I chose frozen pizza and oven chips as my birthday tea.

30th- heavily pregnant and on crutches due to SPD. Went out for dinner with DH and a couple of friends and was violently sick.

21st- exams

18th- planned a night out with friends but one of the popular girls with a birthday around the same time later arranged a big party for the same night. My friends all said they would miss it and come out with me but I felt bad so I said we should all go to Miss Popular's party. Was an OK night but when Miss Popular realised it was my actual birthday she made a big thing about how distressing it must be for me that everyone wanted to be at her party. Sounds really petty but it really pissed me off- especially the pitying looks all her mates gave me when I truthfully said that it was my suggestion to come to the party

I better at organising parties than my DH so organised his - lunch in a local restaurant with mates for his and then I had a 40's 40 party in our local hall with a big band, fancy dress and friends, family & kids. My mum & I did all the catering and people brought their own choice of booze. I LOVE big band music & it was a cross generational hit. Have to start thinking about my 50th soon.

Went to Barcelona with then DH and kids, though not actually on my birthday. That same year would have been my dad's 100th birthday so I did a big fundraiser for Winston's Wish (I lost my dad very young) instead of having a party or gifts.