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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To park on neighbour's drive when they're away

35 replies

printmeanicephoto · 23/09/2021 11:39

My husband has started parking his car on our neighbour's drive as he knows they are away for a week. We have a good relationship with them and a few years ago they agreed to allow us to do this once when they were on holiday.

This time, however, my husband hasn't asked our neighbour's permission and has just done it anyway. I told him I think this is cheeky and that he should just pop them a quick text to see if it's ok. He says no, it'll be fine and he thinks they'll appreciate it from a security point of view, and that we did it a few years ago so it'll be fine now.

We have 3 cars, one in the garage and two on our narrow drive all in a row. The one in my garage is our teen's car which he saved up for himself, the other is mine and the other my husband's. He says parking one of the cars on our neighbour's drive will also make our life easier for a week (ie not having to reverse all the cars out to get out the one in the garage). I said he should park on the road instead as it's a fairly reasonable area with not much car crime.

Despite my protestations about being embarrassed if they return from holiday early to find one of our cars on their drive, he's stuck to his guns.

AIBU to think:

  1. That he should contact via text to check they don't mind
  2. That he shouldn't park there without asking them if I'm not comfortable with it

Just that really, thanks!

OP posts:
ChessieFL · 23/09/2021 11:40

Yes, polite to check. The neighbours may have told someone else they could use the drive while they’re away.

HarrietsChariot · 23/09/2021 11:40

YANBU, he's an entitled prick.

HardStaringBearFromDarkestPeru · 23/09/2021 11:42

I'm with you on this. Can you text your neighbours if your DH is refusing to do so?

PooWillyNameChange · 23/09/2021 11:43

Yes, he should ask.

If I were the neighbour I'd say yes of course immediately, but if I returned and found out it was being done without asking I'd think you were CFs!

PinkFootstool · 23/09/2021 11:45

He's a piss taker. I'd not be happy, and next time he asked I'd say no. The excuse of security for the house is him justifying himself and he knows it.

nzeire · 23/09/2021 11:47

What if they’ve offered it to someone else?

LukeEvansWife · 23/09/2021 11:48

That is quite a display of CFery on your DH's part.

Your parking issues are not their problem. It is fine to have pre-arranged it but to do it anyway and say they will APPRECIATE it???? WTF? Is he normally like this?

How does he know that they haven't agreed for someone else to use their drive? And even if they haven't, it is THEIR drive.

And you have a good relationship with them - why would he want to jeopardise that?

toughdaay · 23/09/2021 11:48

Hmm, my DH would do this and equally wouldn't care if the neighbours used our drive either. I'm much more protective of 'my' drive and would hate it if someone parked on it even for a second. I think your DH is a CF and should ask the neighbours.

LukeEvansWife · 23/09/2021 11:48

Sorry you are married to such a CF Flowers

Sirzy · 23/09/2021 11:50

Can you not send a quick text?

LukeEvansWife · 23/09/2021 11:52

If you send a text they will feel obligated to say its fine.

Normandy144 · 23/09/2021 11:52

I'd just send a quick text. We usually let neighbours know when we are away and I . happy for them to use the drive in our absence because as you say from a security point of view it's helpful. I don't mind at all.

LukeEvansWife · 23/09/2021 11:55

Are they really going to reply "actually, no, your DH is a CF - tell him to move his car immediately"

How about leaving them to enjoy their holiday, moving the car off their drive and letting them sort out their own "security"?

Samcro · 23/09/2021 11:58

i would be angry if someone did this. its not his property. what next he goes in their garden.

Accidentgirlfriend · 23/09/2021 11:58

What happens if you have car trouble ? It breaks down or leaks oil on to the drive ?

3scape · 23/09/2021 11:59

Our neighbours actively encourage us to when they are away, but we always check (If only to know when they're back if we take a different car out for the day).

TimeForTeaAndG · 23/09/2021 12:02

Consenting to anything once is not blanket consent for all future instances.

Your DH is a CF and needs to ask or move his car. He can't assume the neighbours are still ok with him parking there.

AppleKatie · 23/09/2021 12:05

Yes, he should ask.

If I were the neighbour I'd say yes of course immediately, but if I returned and found out it was being done without asking I'd think you were CFs!

This.

My Dneighbours did this for half a week and then text us to ask if they could for the next half of the week. We said yes of course and never mentioned we already knew (from passing family members) that they were doing it anyway. Not worth a neighbourhood dispute but it’s a petty tick in the ‘I don’t really like them’ column.

namechange30455 · 23/09/2021 12:06

@PooWillyNameChange

Yes, he should ask.

If I were the neighbour I'd say yes of course immediately, but if I returned and found out it was being done without asking I'd think you were CFs!

Yes this.

As a neighbour I'd 100% say yes but it would totally change the way I felt about you if you did it without asking and I found out!

ScatteredMama82 · 23/09/2021 12:06

If they have a ring doorbell or similar they will already know!

HotPenguin · 23/09/2021 12:07

Just don't park on their drive fullstop, I would be so pissed off if my neighbour expected to park on my drive whenever I went away. If you haven't got space then why did you get 3 cars in the first place?

hellywelly3 · 23/09/2021 12:08

What if they come home early in the middle of the night? Not fair they can’t park on their own drive

Bluntness100 · 23/09/2021 12:09

Why doesn’t he want to send a quick text? Confused

LukeEvansWife · 23/09/2021 12:10

Its the fact that he thinks he is doing them a favour! Is he like this in other areas of life OP? Has he always been such a CF?

SoupDragon · 23/09/2021 12:10

Given he believes they would be fine with it, what are his objections to actually asking them?