about landlord popping round all the time?

[Thesandmanishere]

We just rented a lovely place and signed a year's contract. The house was previously lived in by the landlord so has been very well maintained.

I'm sure she's very nice but she keeps popping round unannounced and it's starting to irritate me. It's never ostensibly because she wants to check up on us but it obviously actually is. For example she didn't redirect any of her post so she keeps coming round to collect it. She had a parcel delivered here this morning which she came to collect.

I really don't like it as I want to feel that this is "our home" while we pay rent here - I've lived in rentals before and never seen hide nor hair of the landlord other than when there's been a problem to resolve. But I also don't want to piss her off or be unreasonable.

AIBU or should she not be doing this?

Renting is not an "uneven power balance" but a business relationship. You need somewhere to live and the LL needs someone to rent the property. Currently to evict a tenant you are looking at at least a year - probably longer. And thousands of pounds. Your LL sounds like an "amateur" landlord.

Rather than being abrupt I would says something like:-

"I feel awkward saying this but we are very private people and we like out own space. There is really no need for you to call around so often to collect your post and we are beginning to find it very intrusive. So I would be grateful if you would put in place a proper arrangement to have it re-directed to your current address. Legally we are entitled to 24 hours notice in writing of any future visits unless its an extreme emergency. I do hope you understand and will bear this in mind going forward."

Or send her a text/email to that effect.

What @ChargingBuck said is perfect
You do not need to make excuses that it is disrupting your child or any excuse at all - she is breaking the law and clearly hasn’t redirected her post as a crafty way to borderline stalk you
It’s outrageous that she is making you feel constantly on edge in your own home for which she is being well remunerated for
So angry on your behalf OP

Who voted YABU ???!!!

@BeaucoupFish

Who voted YABU ???!!!

The idiot who said that landlords can do whatever they like.

She needs to take several steps back and leave you to live in your home that you are paying for. Yes it's still her bricks and mortar but they aren't "hers" anymore in the sense she doesn't live there anymore

@TemptedToSleepInTheShed

It’s her house and I’m afraid she can do as she pleases while you’re living in her house. Do you have a plan for buying your own?

Have you just stepped off a UFO or something? My DF is a LL and some scrote of a tenant just decided to stop paying rent and wouldn't even let him enter the property for emergency repairs. It took months to evict her and he never got the money back. If anything tenants have more rights than landlords!

Not only that but the neighbours seem to be reporting back on us. I know because of things she drops into conversation

This also needs to be dealt with as it is a form of harassment. I would be speaking very firmly to both the LL and the NDN and telling them that you take a very dim view of tattle tales. There was a time in the past when I had a NDN snitching to my LL when we had personal disputes and I threatened the NDN with legal action.

If you have an agent, speak to them about it and ask them to make contact with her, pointing out that popping round should never happen unannounced and 24 hours notice should be given and only essential visits which should be rare.

If no agent, yes you must make contact. I agree that email is the best way.

‘Dear
We wanted to raise an issue which feels a bit awkward, but we hope you will understand why we are contacting you.

We are thoroughly enjoying living here, but are feeling that we are not quite receiving the privacy that we feel we can expect as tenants. We understand you might have needed to pick up post when you first moved out, but we feel your unannounced visits are now too rpfreauent and not in keeping with tenants rights to privacy and quiet enjoyment if the property.

Please could we request that in future, if you wish to come round, you make a request and give us the required 24 hrs notice in writing or by email. Arranging a formal redirection of mail at this point seems a good idea. We understand you might want to carry out a 6 monthly property inspection, which is entirely usual and will be very happy to accommodate such a visit, but we would appreciate contact being kept to the minimum necessary.

We feel quite awkward sending this email and hope you won’t be offended, but simply appreciate that we need the space to live in our home now and understand that we have found seeing you so frequently rather intrusive. We wanted to remind you of the requirement to give us notice of any visits, to keep them to a minimum and that just popping round isn’t appropriate.

We hope to maintain a long and positive working relationship with you.

Kind regards…

I'm seriously concerned she would let herself in if she came round and we weren't here.

I would try this to test her before I said anything. Just don't answer the door and see what happens. If you can keep LO quiet that is of course!

Agree with everyone else - this is not on Op. You need to tell her firmly to stop. A good tenant is worth its weight in gold so more fool her for risking losing you (& as a pp said, tenants do have a lot of rights and she could lose out significantly if you choose not to pay your rent anymore).

As it is, however, I'd look to move as people like this don't often change their ways!

Good luck!

I feel awkward saying this but we are very private people and we like out own space. There is really no need for you to call around so often to collect your post and we are beginning to find it very intrusive. So I would be grateful if you would put in place a proper arrangement to have it re-directed to your current address. Legally we are entitled to 24 hours notice in writing of any future visits unless its an extreme emergency. I do hope you understand and will bear this in mind going forward.

I personally feel the OP should be more assertive than this - even someone who isn’t very ‘private’ would want their landlord popping around at no notice, any more than you’d want a cold caller. There’s no need to make excuses for not wanting her to come round. I wouldn’t say I was ‘grateful’ or ‘I do hope she understands’. Too nicey nice.
State your rights. Tell her what you expect from now on. Keep it short, concise and firm. I think being to nice and complying is why she’s taken the piss as she has. Not saying it’s the OPs fault - it’s a really awkward situation to get into, the landlady sounds very manipulative.

I’d change the locks, it’s REALLY easy and can be done quickly, just put the originals back when you move out.

It’s time to have a conversation with her, along the lines of “we have never had so many visits from a landlord before, it’s normally an annual inspection and so to have you here unannounced so often isn’t sitting well with us. Is there a reason other than mail collection that you come over? ——— We would much rather keep things in a more formal footing so if you do want to do an inspection we’d happily fit in so long as it’s within government regulations. As for your Mail, will you redirect now or should I mark it not at this address?”

Wow 3 months!? How many times a week is she popping around. I agree you need to keep communication to written down so you have a record

It's once every week to two weeks, always to collect her post. I am just going to start redirecting it myself.

I'm not British and almost no one in my home country owns. It's completely normal there to rent. Consequently tenants have more rights

Actually they have quite a lot in the UK too, but your particular landlord's ignoring the one about "quiet enjoyment" - and in time you'll probably find she'll ignore others too

I'd tell her quietly and politely that you're finding the constant visits very intrusive and you'd rather she only came on a pre-agreed basis; if that fails, just don't answer the door (while making it as obvious as possible that you're in)

It’s her house and I’m afraid she can do as she pleases while you’re living in her house. Do you have a plan for buying your own?

Ignorant, rude, bollocks.

OP you don't need to justify yourself to twits like this!

If you're worried about her feeling etc the just say it's disturbing your sons routine so you'd need 24hrs notice in future so you can accommodate the visit

@Thesandmanishere

It's once every week to two weeks, always to collect her post. I am just going to start redirecting it myself.

OP I agree with this. Don't answer the door if she comes round and keep your key in it on the inside so she can't use hers. She'll soon get the message.

Completely out of order. We rent out our last home and I'd never do this. We redirected our post/told everyone important and I've asked the tenants to shred anything that comes through or 'return to sender' if they can be bothered. It's your home now, she can't just turn up!!!

@TemptedToSleepInTheShed I sincerely hope you're not a landlord.

This is exactly why I would never live in a landlord managed property ever again. I had exactly the same experience except they took to ‘popping in to get something from the loft’ (as they retained sole use of the attic!) and started commenting on the ‘state of the house’ on one occasion (there was a mark on the hallway floor, I didn’t feel like mopping as I had had medical management of a miscarriage that day). They then tried to set up a payment plan with our garden for work to be done, which they expected us to foot the bill for! I would see the landlord wandering around the back garden nipping into the shed for tools (OUR tools) and one week when they were working on the fence belonging to next door, they kept asking to come in to use the loo via text, and when I ignored the text and they saw no car in the drive, they did let themselves in. I was home and hid. They then dumped the broken panels in the back garden and informed me they intended to store them there when I insisted they were disposed of. Then simultaneously held us to ransom over a reference so we could move out, while asking us to stay.

Run. Run now. It won’t get better.

Also if it's a simple Yale lock I'd change the barrel/get it changed. Can always change it back when you leave.

I would approach the agents first if you don't feel comfortable talking to the LL directly. They might be hopeless but they might not, and be used to dealing with amateur LLs who don't know the ins and outs. They should be able to speak to her to remind her of the rights of the tenant and warn her that you are a good tenant that she is risking losing.

I would also recommend that you do as PPs have suggested and change the locks for the duration of your tenancy. You have no idea who could have copies of the keys and it may well be your contents insurance will be invalid if you are burgled with the old locks in. It's worth the expense for peace of mind and additional security.

I'd also stop accepting parcels from couriers etc if they aren't for you. She really needs to absorb that this might be her property but it isn't her home!
It’s her house and I’m afraid she can do as she pleases while you’re living in her house. Do you have a plan for buying your own? So very snide as well as grossly inaccurate. I'd be ashamed to post something so unpleasant...

OP I agree with this. Don't answer the door if she comes round and keep your key in it on the inside so she can't use hers. She'll soon get the message.

I would not really want to waste emergency service time - but surely if she tries to get in without forewarning or permission that is akin to a break in? I’d at least ring 111 if she tried that. Although presumably I’d also have to move out afterwards as relationships would be very soured. Maybe she’s learn a lesson though. She sounds nuts.

We have the exact same thing with our landlady - it's really stressful. I'm trying to be calm about it, but it means we're already thinking of moving on.