Why does this keep happening to me!

[Lauralu19]

Aibu in thinking I will never ever meet somebody. I’m a single parent, my daughter is 2. I’ve not had any luck in dating or meeting somebody, which tbh I would like to, have a feeling it’s never going to happen though.

The reason I’m posting this is I’ve been speaking to somebody for a little while and we planned a date today, 6pm. This was planned on Thursday so enough time to let me know if anything changed. Just casual at the pub for food. Arranged for my mum to have DD for the night. I Was looking forward to it. I was having to drive about half an hour to get there and because I hadn’t heard from him for a few hours I text to see what was happening. He said ‘can just meet there at 5 or 6pm’ which isn’t helpful in itself. Got ready anyway and I said let me know when you’re going to set off and be there. Heard nothing. Tried calling him no answer. I thought I’m not wasting my time going in case he doesn’t turn up but gave him more than enough time to let me know either way, anyway it got to 6:30pm and he text me saying ‘can just meet another day next week if you’re not busy’ I really don’t understand! I’m glad I didn’t just turn up to be stood up

Hmmm and I wonder why the twat is still living with his mummy, not.

I'm sure you know this, but don't ever let a complete stranger come round to your house, it's too dangerous. What a CF.

@Lauralu19 He doesn't know your address right?

@WhoIsPepeSilva no he doesn’t know it. He was asking where I live at one point but I didn’t give full address details

You know I'll bet he doesn't live with his parents. That'll be what he says so you never go to his place - convenient if you're married.

My god. I would have blocked when he first fucked me around.
Block now. Jesus.
Can someone recommend some books for the Op. she needs to learn some boundaries, I presume he knows you have a child so you had to organise childcare,
Fuck this shit. MOVE ON NOW

[quote Lauralu19]@WhoIsPepeSilva no he doesn’t know it. He was asking where I live at one point but I didn’t give full address details[/quote]
Phew! Sorry @Lauralu19 I just suddenly thought maybe him saying he would come over meant that he did which would obviously be potentially dangerous. I'm sure you know that and I'll wind my neck in ha ha!

How are you feeling about it all now?

@Limejuiceandrum

My god. I would have blocked when he first fucked me around. Block now. Jesus. Can someone recommend some books for the Op. she needs to learn some boundaries, I presume he knows you have a child so you had to organise childcare, Fuck this shit. MOVE ON NOW

www.freedomprogramme.co.uk/

Good place to start

He is looking for a shag without having to buy you dinner first. Just block him

@Lauralu19

Aibu in thinking I will never ever meet somebody. I’m a single parent, my daughter is 2. I’ve not had any luck in dating or meeting somebody, which tbh I would like to, have a feeling it’s never going to happen though.

The reason I’m posting this is I’ve been speaking to somebody for a little while and we planned a date today, 6pm. This was planned on Thursday so enough time to let me know if anything changed. Just casual at the pub for food. Arranged for my mum to have DD for the night. I Was looking forward to it. I was having to drive about half an hour to get there and because I hadn’t heard from him for a few hours I text to see what was happening. He said ‘can just meet there at 5 or 6pm’ which isn’t helpful in itself. Got ready anyway and I said let me know when you’re going to set off and be there. Heard nothing. Tried calling him no answer. I thought I’m not wasting my time going in case he doesn’t turn up but gave him more than enough time to let me know either way, anyway it got to 6:30pm and he text me saying ‘can just meet another day next week if you’re not busy’ I really don’t understand! I’m glad I didn’t just turn up to be stood up

Unfortunately having a child really does lower your scope in available men. Not all men want a 'oven ready' family.

@Notmoresugar

Hmmm and I wonder why the twat is still living with his mummy, not.

I'm sure you know this, but don't ever let a complete stranger come round to your house, it's too dangerous. What a CF.

Why is he a twat?

Why is he still living at home? Could it be that he's not a young single mother who can jump the council waiting list? Thought not.

Have you read the thread Sneaky? He's not a polite well mannered guy who has treated the OP well has he? = Twat

Id cut him loose and move on tbh

Could it be that he's not a young single mother who can jump the council waiting list?
What a stupid remark. Behave.

OP,

I think you are clued in, this could have been his plan.

Dump him.
Something is off.

@KikoLemons *You arranged 6pm. I wd have expected to meet at 6pm. You texted to ask if he was still going ahead - why??? He then thought for some reason you were changing things/ unsure so said 5 or 6 - either is fine. (Maybe he thought you were leaving early and worried about sitting on your own). You then asked him to text again????? You called. (He might have been in the shower) You then stood him up, having texted and called about a date that was fixed (time, place, activity).

(If I were him I'd think you were too much like hard work)*

This is another way of looking at it. What was all the checking for? If you had just left it as it was decided previously - 6pm, you would have met him.

@SneakyCucumberAction not sure if that’s aimed at me, but I’m actually privately renting

Obviously don’t let a man you’ve not even met come round to your house.

I don’t know if you’re doing this anyway but if this is online dating then I would do one or two zoom dates first in future.

@SneakyCucumberAction is presumably a middle aged guy living with his parents who got dumped by a single mother and is now bitter.

I think that was his plan all along OP, to get into your home without the hassle of a date.

Which is very fucking creepy.

Don't worry, at 23 you have all the time in the world to meet someone.

Please tell me you didn’t let him come round?

Tbh with a 2 year old you need someone who understands your time commitments and responsibilities. I'd be so annoyed at someone that didn't get that I need to organise childcare etc. I guess you weren't paying a babysitter or I think you'd be more peed off. I think be clear about the fact that if he wants to meet he needs to be clear about times etc as it's not that easy for you to just go out whenever you fancy. I'd say give him one more chance after you've made that clear and if he does t respect what you've said, bin him and move on. I know 3 women who met their lovely partners after having their first child with a previous partner. One now has a step daughter and another son, one went on to have 3 more kids, one went on the have 5 more! Doesn't seem like a hopeless situation to me, just got to be proactive and clear about what you want/need to avoid time wasters x

Get him to meet near you.
Honestly if he is interested he will agree.
Also ask him to let you know when he sets off.
This is not me trying to.play games, but men do not value women who don't value themselves.

Married. Block. Move on.

@Bluntness100 no I didn’t!

Well done! Block snd delete op. You can do better.