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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

URGENT HELP- think school are taking the piss

77 replies

chocolatethunder · 15/09/2021 20:23

First time post. Need urgent advice before I loose my mind and it's very outing to!
Ds is very poorly and has a 1;1 at school, one for morning one in afternoon
I'm fighting a loosing battle to get him to a special school as school he's in can't look after him properly but that's another story

At the beginning of the week he fell (he's wobbly) and banged his head- had a little tiny lump and brooze. Used to this so thought nothing of it
Today my dd was having issues going the toilet so my friend tried to take ds to school as we was going to be late. He didn't want to go so that's fine il take them together (my friends seen him) and so did the lady in reception as she walked him to class

So when I pick him up at lunch - doctors appointment- he has a hugeeeeeee egg on his head!!! I was like wow, jaw hit the floor when I seen him an so did the receptionist she agreed it wasn't their this morning. 1;1 said she hasn't had his eyes off him all day and he hasn't banged it

So my question is - can the swelling of a bump happen so quickly in the space of 2.5 hours so long after it happening originally ??? I can add pictures but need advice before I loose my shit if im honest, I'm in bits and at my whits end with the school.

OP posts:
BelieveInRainbows · 15/09/2021 21:36

It might just be the picture, but the bridge of his nose looks a little swollen and under his eyes look like they're starting to bruise too. I think I'd go to A&E now instead of waiting until the morning. Hopefully all is okay though.

Mymapuddlington · 15/09/2021 21:39

@BelieveInRainbows I thought that too. I actually can’t think of an incident that would cause a bruise to come up like that as well as his eyes and nose looking effected as well bless him.

Original poster
chocolatethunder · 15/09/2021 21:41

@overworkedrobot

They forgot to review the ehcp before summer

Was the meeting in March the annual review? If so, there wouldn't have been another AR in the summer term, but you could ask for an early review, although there's no right of appeal if the LA refuse. An AR must be held every 12 months, if March's meeting wasn't the AR and the last one was longer than that complain using IPSEA's model letter, then threaten Judicial Review.

If March was the annual review did the LA amend the EHCP afterwards, and if you have the finalised amended EHCP have you appealed if a special school isn't named and you want one to be?

No in March it was agreed the EHCP was going to ne reviewed early due to the massive change in needs and wanting to move school. Was done in September last year his original one !
OP posts:
Elephantsparade · 15/09/2021 21:44

Now i see the picture it looks like two seperate injuries. A skull fracture can cause bruising around the eyes.

Poor boy i hope he feels ok.

Summerfun54321 · 15/09/2021 21:44

He’s got a head injury that is getting worse. I would go to A&E.

Blue4YOU · 15/09/2021 21:47

I’m also going to say that I’d be taking that to A and E - his forehead looks swollen all over as does his nose. I know you place a lot of faith in your nurse but that looks quite nasty

FrownedUpon · 15/09/2021 21:48

Why have you still got him in the school if it’s that bad. Move him or educate him at home.

Mymapuddlington · 15/09/2021 21:50

@FrownedUpon op has explained the struggle trying to move him and once you home school it can be incredibly difficult to get a special needs child back into school.

overworkedrobot · 15/09/2021 21:55

Early reviews are carried out by the LA not schools. If you asked the LA in March why didn't you chase it up before now?

Is the meeting next week a formal review? If so, has the relevant information been gathered and shared?

Frownedupon EHE is unlikely to help, as Mymapuddlington posts, getting support and provision often becomes harder when you're out of the system.

Original poster
chocolatethunder · 15/09/2021 22:00

@overworkedrobot

Early reviews are carried out by the LA not schools. If you asked the LA in March why didn't you chase it up before now?

Is the meeting next week a formal review? If so, has the relevant information been gathered and shared?

Frownedupon EHE is unlikely to help, as Mymapuddlington posts, getting support and provision often becomes harder when you're out of the system.

All our consultants and doctors and nurses and physio etc did the reviews in March so they've done another last week so we have 2 from each relevant person. I have the best teams just not school. I do thing it is 2 bangs but il never know and they know that. I think 90% of the time I will be keeping him off school safe and not secluded an just send him 1 morning a week to keep his place in the system Iv no other options
OP posts:
Confused102 · 15/09/2021 22:02

Poor baby. That looks so sore. How is he feeling op? I would be extremely upset too. Hope you get some answers tomorrow.

Original poster
chocolatethunder · 15/09/2021 22:04

@overworkedrobot

Early reviews are carried out by the LA not schools. If you asked the LA in March why didn't you chase it up before now?

Is the meeting next week a formal review? If so, has the relevant information been gathered and shared?

Frownedupon EHE is unlikely to help, as Mymapuddlington posts, getting support and provision often becomes harder when you're out of the system.

Also I did chase it up and kept getting different answers an was told it was under way an it would all be sorted by September (now) but only last week did the school senco respond to me an say it never actually got done even though everyone from my side sent their information, school didn't complete theirs ! I took him out of school in may an hes only just gone back

Since may at home hes started to walk on his own again, got more Speach back and not had to wear nappy's like school said he had to do !
it is very evident from the change we've had that school doesn't help so moving forward wil be one morning a week to maintain his place an that's all. I can't mentally take no more worry with my baby boy it's breaking me.

OP posts:
Original poster
chocolatethunder · 15/09/2021 22:04

@Confused102

Poor baby. That looks so sore. How is he feeling op? I would be extremely upset too. Hope you get some answers tomorrow.
He's okay in himself still full of cuddles and trying to play football an hasn't mentioned it so do think it looks worse then it is! Xx
OP posts:
DukeOfEarlGrey · 15/09/2021 22:10

OP I would at least call 111 for advice on that rather than waiting until the morning.

Original poster
chocolatethunder · 15/09/2021 22:11

@DukeOfEarlGrey

OP I would at least call 111 for advice on that rather than waiting until the morning.
He's been medically seen already today
OP posts:
overworkedrobot · 15/09/2021 22:19

Did you chase the LA, not school? An early review requested in March should not take until September to hold, the LA are at fault here and it's them you should have chased.

It is not just about the doctors/physio etc. writing reports, information has to be circulated to attendees 2 weeks before the review. Has it been? You might find this outline of annual review timescales helpful. Early review follow the same timescales.

SparklyLeprechaun · 15/09/2021 22:24

Only time I've seen something like this is when DD was running and fell head first on concrete. Panda eyes developed very quickly.

It looks awful, I can't see how he could have done it without anyone noticing. Surely he would have cried at least?

DecorChange · 15/09/2021 22:31

I'm no expert but it looks to me to be in the same place. But I'm not there. Dd once fell off a wall on a bike (no clue why she thought it was a good idea) she seemed fine but after about 3 hours her face was black and huge. Hope you get answers soon

crapatthis1 · 15/09/2021 22:51

It can happen where bruises can get bigger/ darker over time so try not to panic too much. I play sport and will often get what starts off as a lighter bruise and will become very dark or even yellow over a matter of days.

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 15/09/2021 22:56

I agree with pp, that looks like two separate injuries. My first instinct is that he has banged it again. I know school have said he hasn't but they can't possibly have eyes on him every minute of every day, that is physically impossible.

I'd take him back to A&E, OP. Any worsening head injury needs to be taken seriously.

Hugoslavia · 15/09/2021 22:58

I've actually seen a mild goose egg bump suddenly turn black and blue. The goose egg pops up first, although isn't always that noticable if not discoloured. The blood from it can then soon flow to the skin and change colour.

This is an extract from a health site.

A goose egg is essentially just a bruise on the forehead. These bumps often turn black and blue after a day or two.

Hugoslavia · 15/09/2021 23:05

Some more info which you may find reassuring.

pmpediatrics.com/dear-dr-christina/black-and-blue-what-your-bruise-tells-you/

DiscoLightsOnAFridayNight · 15/09/2021 23:06

That is not a fresh bruise, they turn blue / black when they are 1-2 days old so it fits the timeline of the original bump.

Livia22 · 15/09/2021 23:57

@iwannabelikeyouhoohoo

No advice but brooze has made my day

You are an idiot.

OP I agree A&E should be first priority and then think about the rest in the morning.

It’s a rather charming spelling! Similar posts are often commented upon here; absolutely no need for the deletion.
VaguelyInteresting · 16/09/2021 00:10

Hmmm

I think I’d be at A&E tonight with that, OP, regardless of how it happened. Like a PP I’d be slightly worried about skull fracture too, with swelling eyes etc, and if I understand from the above posts, he’s not verbal, so he can’t necessarily tell you what he’s feeling like to reassure you?

If it HAS been 2 bumps in a short space of time he’s at higher risk of brain injury (I know that’s a scary phrase but it covers everything from concussion up) - and for me would be another reason to seek further reassurance tonight.

Hope he’s okay- poor love. And you, it all sounds so stressful and worrying Flowers

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