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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you be a bit disappointed?

47 replies

Backofbeyond50 · 14/09/2021 16:17

So I have two siblings. They both have kids who went to good Universities
My DD is currently looking at Universities so I was chatting to said siblings about it. They asked what Universities she was looking at. I told them and it did include Cambridge which is her 1st choice.
Ones response was O my dd could have gone to Oxbridge but didn't want to as it is so elitist bla bla.
The other said that there is no way kids these day are brighter than. When she went so it must be do much easier to get in etc etc..
AIBU to feel a bit deflated.

OP posts:
PurpleFlower1983 · 14/09/2021 16:18

YABU to take any notice of the jealous idiots.

Jumpingintosummer · 14/09/2021 16:18

They are being pricks.

MangoBiscuit · 14/09/2021 16:19

Blimey, I'm surprised you didn't see their eyes glow green! As PurpleFlower says, take no notice of their jealousy.

Lindy2 · 14/09/2021 16:21

Jealousy and sibling competiveness.

Just crack on with your own plans and ignore their comments.

AryaStarkWolf · 14/09/2021 16:25

Bit nasty of them

ANameChangeAgain · 14/09/2021 16:26

Yabu to take any notice of fully grown women behaving like preschoolers. Don't they call this sort of behaviour inverted snobbery?

LadyCatStark · 14/09/2021 16:26

Oh it’s just jealousy and trying to play down your DD’s achievements. DS started at a Grammar School last September and I’ve lost count of the amount of people who have said, “Oh, they (they never explain who they is/are) wanted me/ my DS to go to the grammar school but I/he decided not to because they don’t play football/ I couldn’t be bothered to take the test/ I didn’t like the uniform/ insert other vague reason.”

WitchBaby · 14/09/2021 16:29

Ignore them OP and know that inside they are seething with jealousy 😂

girlmom21 · 14/09/2021 16:48

There's always an excuse as to why someone didn't 'want' to attend these universities etc...

TaraR2020 · 14/09/2021 16:50

Yanbu - insecurity on their part. Whether there's any truth to what they say doesn't matter, if your dd goes she'll still have all the benefits that come with an oxbridge education

RedHelenB · 14/09/2021 16:51

Some people don't want to go who are academically able to. Don't automatically assume jealousy. Good luck to your daughter OP.

Fraine · 14/09/2021 16:52

I would be so happy if my nieces and nephews got into Cambridge.

As the kids’ aunt said in East is East - ‘I’ve wiped their shitty arse before now!’ Grin i.e. I’m very close to them.

lockdownalli · 14/09/2021 16:53

YABU to pay them any mind to be honest.

Onlinedilema · 14/09/2021 16:55

Take no notice op, they sound jealous. Your dd needs to try and work out what is best for her.

YouTubeAddict · 14/09/2021 16:58

Yeah definitely jealousy. I had an ex-friend who was like this and I’m only annoyed with myself because I didn’t see through her quicker 😤

Polkadots2021 · 14/09/2021 17:01

@Backofbeyond50

So I have two siblings. They both have kids who went to good Universities My DD is currently looking at Universities so I was chatting to said siblings about it. They asked what Universities she was looking at. I told them and it did include Cambridge which is her 1st choice. Ones response was O my dd could have gone to Oxbridge but didn't want to as it is so elitist bla bla. The other said that there is no way kids these day are brighter than. When she went so it must be do much easier to get in etc etc.. AIBU to feel a bit deflated.
Wow she isn't even hiding the bitterness and jealousy, is she. That's awful. Well done to your DD she has done amazing!!
AhNowTed · 14/09/2021 17:04

So jealous they can't even make the scantest effort to hide it.

Claricestarling1 · 14/09/2021 17:08

Hahaha wow they are GREEN!!!

Gorl · 14/09/2021 17:10

Yanbu, that was very rude of them. They’re clearly a bit jealous of your bright daughter!

DeletedByAccident · 14/09/2021 17:13

@RedHelenB

Some people don't want to go who are academically able to. Don't automatically assume jealousy. Good luck to your daughter OP.
Maybe. However, the normal acceptable response would be “oh that’s fantastic!”
Bywayofanupdate · 14/09/2021 17:16

Well done to your daughter 👊 Ignore your jealous siblings!

Janaih · 14/09/2021 17:17

It's best to completely filter out these snakey comments and pretend they said something nice like a decent person would.
"Thankyou. Yes we are very proud of her for working so hard".
Confuses the hell out of them.

Holskey · 14/09/2021 17:19

The first comment about it being elitist wouldn't bother me at all. As siblings, you're close enough to be honest (rather than just be polite about choices).

The second comment is so pathetic I would have laughed.

driftcompatible · 14/09/2021 17:21

Laugh. Pure jealousy. How embarrassing for them. I bet they are burning inside with envy and they pretty much told you that. Enjoy the fact that they were stewing in it.

As for the 'DD could have gone' the response to that is 'oh I didn't realise she got in and turned the place down!' Because otherwise it's total bollocks. You only 'could have gone' if offered a place.

vixeyann · 14/09/2021 17:25

@RedHelenB

Some people don't want to go who are academically able to. Don't automatically assume jealousy. Good luck to your daughter OP.
But why not keep that to themselves, even if it's not jealously it appears snide.
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