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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Table hoggers

87 replies

wanttomarryamillionaire · 14/09/2021 14:45

Im not sure if im being unreasonable or not but this really irritated me this morning. Myself and an elderly relative went to a very popular local cafe. It has less tables and chairs inside than it used to because of covid regulations and it also has tables and chairs outside but these were unusable this morning due to the pouring rain. The cafe was very busy and we waited for around 20 minutes for a table. During the time we waited there were at least 3 tables of people who had finished eating and drinking and were just sat there chatting. These people could see that there were lots of others waiting for tables but just continued to sit there chatting the whole time we were waiting and while we ate and were still sitting there when we left! AIBU to say this is really really rude and selfish? They can see others were waiting and they kept tables from being used, i also think the cafe manager should have said something to them.

OP posts:

SpiderinaWingMirror · 14/09/2021 16:30

The cafe needs to move them on.
A quick "can I get you anything else" followed by a "we need the table to seat waiting customers" works.

RunningStrong · 14/09/2021 16:33

I wouldn't have waited and if I'm out for a coffee or similar with friends the whole point is to have a chat. They're not just selling us coffee, they're selling us a nice morning out. I wouldn't go back if I got moved on.

girlmom21 · 14/09/2021 16:41

I wouldn't wait for a seat in a café but I wouldn't rush out the door because other people were waiting either, especially if I was mid-conversation.

TractorAndHeadphones · 14/09/2021 16:43

@SpiderinaWingMirror

The cafe needs to move them on. A quick "can I get you anything else" followed by a "we need the table to seat waiting customers" works.

Yes this! It’s the cafés job to balance the number of people waiting vs profit.

Biancadelrioisback · 14/09/2021 16:44

It is frustrating but like others say, where were they meant to go? Continue their conversation in the rain? Maybe they were going to order more food/drinks but we're waiting for the queue to die down a bit?

I get frustrated when someone uses a table of 4 or more for just them and their laptop, plus all their work documents, notebooks, chargers for various devices, bags etc and hog the table most of the day (especially over busy periods).
Just use the library or a co-working space!

TiredButDancing · 14/09/2021 17:28

Blimey, it wouldn't even cross my mind to stop chatting because other people were waiting for a table. Assuming i've paid for my coffee and cake, I wouldn't feel any need to leap up as soon as they're finished. that's bonkers.

I do ensure that I buy something at least every hour if I'm in a cafe working for a few hours, but that's more just because I don't think it's fair for the cafe to have my table taken up if I'm just having one cup of coffee over 2 hours.

Winemewhynot · 14/09/2021 17:32

I think it’s a bit unreasonable to expect customers to leave the moment they stop eating, it might might a catch up date with friends, I might be pondering cake

It’s down the cafe management to decide a policy and enforce it.

lockdownalli · 14/09/2021 17:37

@Winemewhynot

I think it’s a bit unreasonable to expect customers to leave the moment they stop eating, it might might a catch up date with friends, I might be pondering cake

It’s down the cafe management to decide a policy and enforce it.

Totally agree with this!

Sciurus83 · 14/09/2021 17:38

I mean it's one of those things that is unreasonable, but it is massively annoying. See also groups of 2 taking the big tables when it's busy and they could be on a smaller one and stopping groups bigger than 2 from finding a seat. Technically not done anything wrong but I silently seeth at those selfish asshats

Toddlerteaplease · 14/09/2021 17:53

Drives me nuts when I meet my
Parents in a cafe and they sit at a table without even ordering a drink while they are waiting.

QueenBee52 · 14/09/2021 19:07

@Winemewhynot

I think it’s a bit unreasonable to expect customers to leave the moment they stop eating, it might might a catch up date with friends, I might be pondering cake

It’s down the cafe management to decide a policy and enforce it.

I enforced it by asking for my money back for our 4 lunches paid for and couldn't sit down to eat...

They initially refused me a refund, so I asked them to find us a table to eat the food they had sold me, which they refused, so they relented and refunded me my money..

Sorted...

Original poster

wanttomarryamillionaire · 14/09/2021 20:11

Hi thank you for all the replies. I only sat and waited because this place is the only place round here that's suitable for the elderly relative ( ie not a greasy spoon full of builders swearing). She can't walk far and is unsteady on her feet and i can park here. It wasn't lunch time, it was mid morning and the majority of people were just having coffees and teas etc not eating lunch! I wouldn't expect anyone to rush their drink but to sit at a table in a busy place where it's obvious that there are lots of people waiting for tables ( not just us) for at least 30-45mins after you have finished your drink is just plain rude and ignorant imo!

OP posts:

ChocBeforeCock · 14/09/2021 20:16

This is why I give busy places a swerve because I do agree you shouldn’t linger while people are waiting, but equally for me sitting in a cafe is as much for the company as the coffee so I hate feeling like I need to rush.

Surewhynot · 14/09/2021 20:41

I hate this too. We went to a touristy place earlier in the year and the cafes were still outdoors only. It was lunchtime and lots of people waiting but the majority of those on the tables weren’t eating or drinking, they were just chatting or looking at phones.

It’s really inconsiderate. I mean, no-one expects you to bolt your food and drink then fuck off with five minutes, but leisurely group chats and single men taking up whole tables is not on when they can see people waiting.

TractorAndHeadphones · 14/09/2021 20:50

@wanttomarryamillionaire

This is a difficult one. I'd say that it's rude to hog a table but that's because it's unfair to the cafe - not because other people are waiting. A cafe isn't a public service where you're obliged to consider others. On the other hand if it was the only place around like that and there was a crowd I'd be conscious of the space. It's not really wrong, but inconsiderate. Also not customers' fault that it's the only place around there.

HalzTangz · 14/09/2021 22:32

This happens all the time in my local Costa, people taking a table all day to use their WiFi to work on their laptops whilst (according to staff) only buying 2 drinks the whole day

PigletJohn · 14/09/2021 23:06

My Italian friend wanted us to go and sit at one of the occupied tables.

BlackberryMuncher · 14/09/2021 23:15

@SpiderinaWingMirror

The cafe needs to move them on. A quick "can I get you anything else" followed by a "we need the table to seat waiting customers" works.

Define 'works'. It might get other people sitting at the table there & then, but it won't get return customers. Soon you'll have annoyed so many customers you won't need to worry about there being a free table.

Kara198 · 14/09/2021 23:22

It is rude. We went to a food festival with our young dc at the weekend. Ordered some street food and made our way to the big seating area. So many adults just sat chatting with no food or even a drink! My dc had to sit on the floor to eat. I sat there totally pissed off.

BoredZelda · 14/09/2021 23:41

She can't walk far and is unsteady on her feet and i can park here

Can’t walk far but can stand waiting for 20 minutes?

BoredZelda · 14/09/2021 23:43

It was lunchtime and lots of people waiting but the majority of those on the tables weren’t eating or drinking, they were just chatting or looking at phones.

Perhaps they were waiting for food/drinks to come, and what’s wrong with people looking at phones?

Original poster

wanttomarryamillionaire · 14/09/2021 23:46

@BoredZelda

She can't walk far and is unsteady on her feet and i can park here

Can’t walk far but can stand waiting for 20 minutes?

There was two chairs to sit on while you waited at the entrance.

OP posts:

KatherineJaneway · 14/09/2021 23:50

I couldn't imagine sitting there for 20 or 30 minutes chatting away after finishing my drink / snack knowing people were waiting to sit down. Who would be that selfish.

Rosebel · 14/09/2021 23:55

I'm guessing those saying the staff should move them on have never worked in this sort of job. Tbh most people who work with the public have had enough of being shouted at, sworn at, insulted and threatened. All while working on minimum wage.
So unsurprisingly they try to limit that threat where possible. You'd think politely asking them to vacate the table would result in the said person leaving (and some will) but all to often it ends up with the staff getting verbally abused and sometimes physically.

TableFlowerss · 14/09/2021 23:59

@PineappleWilson

What was so good about this cafe that you waited 20 minutes for a table? I'd have left and gone elsewhere tbh.

Same.

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