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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you ever think you’re really lucky?

130 replies

AtlasPine · 10/09/2021 23:53

I do, but I don’t take it for granted and don’t thing I deserve it.

Not hungry

People love me

Not anything special but life hasn’t beaten me down as such.

OP posts:
Withgasoliiiiine · 11/09/2021 05:32

Yes!!

I live in a safe country which has an imperfect government but the resources and culture of supporting its population. I have a family who care, rent a lovely, safe, little house, have an interesting and I have to admit, quite impressive on paper, educational and career history and a chance at retraining in something bloody hard to get into but which I think will be extremely rewarding. I have wonderful friends, am attractive (although struggle to keep my weight down) and broadly healthy.

I have faced some real adversity, including ongoing health problems and adverse experiences, plus imposter syndrome and low self esteem but have been able to afford good help with trying to manage all this mentally. I don't have much spare money but have the skills to find work.

Sometimes I get told I am very strong for keeping going and laughing when dealing with issues but I honestly think the good in my life outweighs the bad. I don't think it's all about comparison but my dear best friend is from an extremely troubled country. He lives in the UK, originally as a refugee, but I've seen how much stress and fear for close family that still causes him, especially now it has flared up there again. I am (touch wood) never likely to have that hanging over me my whole life and that is very lucky. He's done nothing to merit that, it's just fortune. My aunt has been housebound for years for health issues that are psychological at their core. Again, she doesn't deserve this, it's all just luck and on balance I think I'm not doing so badly.

Pemmican · 11/09/2021 06:00

All the time.

Whenever I start feeling a bit sorry for myself, I remember that I live in a country where we flush our toilets with drinking water.

Tlollj · 11/09/2021 06:10

Yep definitely lucky. Four healthy happy grown children. Not one day of sickness whilst pregnant. Easy quick straightforward deliveries.
6 soon to be 7 dgc. Good kind dils and son in law.
Still got my mum at 93.
Not much money but bills are paid and there’s food in the fridge.
Yep life is good.

NotReallyAPrincess · 11/09/2021 06:16

Yes, I’m very lucky. Life isn’t perfect but it’s great. My close family are brilliant.

I do not take it for granted, at all.

fourminutestosavetheworld · 11/09/2021 06:23

Yes. I am a poor single mum, and my marriage ended due to his affair. But I love my home, my kids, the town I live in, my job. I often open my curtains in the morning and feel lucky as I look outside at my garden and neighbourhood, and on the journey to work. Historically, happy childhood and many decades of happy marriage before it ended. So many good memories. There have been bad bits of course, and sometimes I'm a bit lonely, or worried about money I suppose, but all of the other things too the balance.

lannistunut · 11/09/2021 06:33

I know I am lucky, yes. The biggest luck is my health and the health of my family. I also live in a town people can feel safe in and find work in.

But I also acknowledge sometimes I feel bad, as life is complicated too.

Even though I recognise the backdrop of luck, and am very grateful for it, I am not one of those callous optimists who brushes off other people's hurt, stress or worry.

ILikeYourHair · 11/09/2021 06:35

No, cause i’m not.
My life is awful.

Cosmos123 · 11/09/2021 06:46

I feel incredibly blessed to have the freedom.
Freedom to work, drive make decisions for myself.
I'm lucky to have family who are always there.
I'm lucky to have job which pays my bills.
Lucky to born in the west where we have rights and freedom.

lannistunut · 11/09/2021 06:47

@ILikeYourHair

No, cause i’m not. My life is awful.
Flowers Brew
Roselilly36 · 11/09/2021 06:54

I think I am very lucky to have met my lovely DH, had my wonderful DS’ moved a few times, always gone through ok. We can afford to buy most things we needs. And our home is full of love. So yes, very, very lucky.

vampirethriller · 11/09/2021 06:56

Yes! I always say I'm the luckiest woman in the world.
I used to be homeless after being forced into prostitution, I was an addict, an alcoholic and living and working on the street.
Now I've got a little flat, my daughter and my dog. We've got an allotment, I'm back in contact with my family and friends, I'm going back to college. I'm very luckySmile

SandysMam · 11/09/2021 07:00

I have a serious health condition and constantly get told how dreadful it must be to be me!! But I don’t feel that way! I feel lucky to live in a country which treats my condition and lucky to have experienced the utter kindness I have along the way. Also lucky to have had the loveliest kindest parents, fantastic friends and an amazing DH and kids who get me through it all.

SandysMam · 11/09/2021 07:01

@vampirethriller I have seen your posts about your past before - I think yours is hard work and determination, not just luck!! Always think you sound like an amazingly strong woman!!

FastFood · 11/09/2021 07:05

@vampirethriller

Yes! I always say I'm the luckiest woman in the world. I used to be homeless after being forced into prostitution, I was an addict, an alcoholic and living and working on the street. Now I've got a little flat, my daughter and my dog. We've got an allotment, I'm back in contact with my family and friends, I'm going back to college. I'm very luckySmile
Whaooo, well done!
Mummadeze · 11/09/2021 07:07

I am lucky. I have a well paid job that many people would love to do. A family member recently helped me enormously in terms of giving me a secure home to live in. I have good friends who care about me. And the kindest DD imaginable. That is not to say that there aren’t things that are not good in my life. I am in an unhappy relationship and I worry constantly about my weight. Over all I definitely see myself as lucky though.

TreeSmuggler · 11/09/2021 07:20

If I'm honest, I only think this about half the time. Sometimes I feel really lucky. Sometimes I turn the tap on and have a glass of water, and I actually tear up with how lucky I am just for this, how good it tastes, how clean, how safe, how easy.

Other times I admit I think, yes I'm lucky, but others are luckier, and it sure would be nice to be like them. For example, my DH once said "aren't we so lucky to have our house". I worked full time my whole life, at a job I hate, saved, and bought it. He hardly worked (no medical or other reason, just didn't want to, preferred travelling and partying), saved nothing, married me and boom he has a free house. So yes we are, but not quite in the same way. I try not to think this way though.

Clarinet53 · 11/09/2021 07:23

I do feel lucky. There are plenty of folk who would love my life.

I was told by teachers I wouldn't amount to much. I have a really good career!

Consultant told me I wouldn't be able to become a mum. I have two amazing teens. Their take on life makes me so proud!

I had a good husband. Unfortunately, he decided he needed more than what I had to offer and left for a colleague. We are on good terms so that when he wants to he is able to see the teens.

Life is not always easy but I feel mine is perfectly imperfect 🙂

OddBoots · 11/09/2021 07:28

Oh yes, I feel so very fortunate and I always have but having recently read (well, heard the audiobook of) Brading Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer I had so much more to be grateful for than it had ever occurred me to think about before.

imip · 11/09/2021 07:33

Despite not what everyone would think is lucky, I feel very lucky indeed.

Crappy, violent, poor childhood. Not much educationally but eventually got a good degree - just ‘fell’ into it! Never any aspirations. Lots of travel. Good husband, children with autism who I have had to strongly advocate for. Constantly stressed by their needs, a good PT job but it causes me lots of stress.

But I think imagine doing this in Afghanistan, trying to get my girls an education would be horrendous, having their needs meet. Most likely I would be illiterate, no freedom of expression.

In very much a glass half full kind of person, I think it is what keeps me sane.

vampirethriller · 11/09/2021 07:36

@SandysMam thank you! I'm a very stubborn person which has helped me not give upGrin

Rossetti47 · 11/09/2021 07:36

I was utterly lucky and blessed. But all changed. Life changes, enjoy it while it’s good.

LastGirlSanding · 11/09/2021 07:39

I feel grateful rather than lucky for some things. Luck to me is random and nothing to do with work or effort - so I feel lucky to live in a country where I am safe on the whole and have access to many things other don’t have, just because I was lucky to be born here.

Most of the rest of my life I feel grateful for because it took many years and a lot of really bad things to overcome to get here. So I feel really grateful when I reflect and think about things like work or relationships and my own sense of peace and happiness because I know how it feels to be on the flip side of that year after year after year.

Elephantsparade · 11/09/2021 07:41

I feel very blessed to be born here and the era I was born as so far my life has been lucky. Always had adequete shelter, food, warmth and water. Always been able to get healthcare and had a great state education and my employment has always had good health and safety measures, annual leave and hours.

However, noone knows whats ahead the second half of my life could be beset with post covid/brexit chaos and climate change chaos and poor health.

Bananarice · 11/09/2021 07:41

Dm few weeks ago another family secret was revealed. I'm very grateful for dm that she was able to hide a lot of things from me. Yes, I feel stupid now not having had connected the pieces together. But how would knowing it, any early have helped me?

I'm glad to hear this now as an adult instead of as a child.

FoxgloveSummers · 11/09/2021 07:45

I have always felt incredibly lucky - having a loving family (although not without problems), a permanent home to grow up in, amazing animals to live with. Currently despite my employment situation being precarious I feel so lucky that I met and married an amazingly kind man who constantly backs me up when times are tough. I was single for many years and dated many men, some nice, some crap, and I have a lot of single friends still so I know there is no good reason for this huge piece of luck - it’s random.