Am I a hypocrite for being on SM but not sharing anything about my own life?

[BeenThruMoreThanALilBit]

Yes - YABU
No - YANBU

Personally, I think if people want to share, they can but I’m bring lambasted (well, criticised) for “taking” but not “giving”

Criticised for not plastering your life all over the internet.
Good enough reason to come off it I'd say. It's mostly lies anyway.

Taking what? The random shite other people post about? Social media is entertainment at this point so there's no reason to put anything on it if you don't want to.

You know someone with a weird view on social media consumption.

People can share as much or as little as they like. It’s a personal choice.

If they don't like it they don't have to engage with you. YANBU.

I find it odd when people have blank profiles and never like/comment/share/react etc

Find it a bit unsettling as most people share pics, vids, thoughts... That's kind of the point

If you've nothing to say or contribute why be on there? Would be like going to a party and standing in the corner not speaking to anyone or engaging imo.

Why are you even asking this question?

It's almost as weird as being 'lambasted'.

@LondonGrimmer

I find it odd when people have blank profiles and never like/comment/share/react etc

Find it a bit unsettling as most people share pics, vids, thoughts... That's kind of the point

If you've nothing to say or contribute why be on there? Would be like going to a party and standing in the corner not speaking to anyone or engaging imo.

I'm like the OP. A lot of businesses are active on social media. I use it to find gardeners, hairdressers, baby groups, nail technicians, cake makers, curtain alterations... the list goes on and on. Many don't have websites and their SM pages have reviews.

Yes I understand that aspect @Holskey I guess I get mildly irked at times when a certain friend who always says she "doesn't do social media" will reply to something I'm talking about with "yeah, I know, I saw it on your FB". I forget she's on there as she never interacts.

And for some it might feel unbalanced: one person putting lots on (their choice) and the other not putting anything (also their choice).

But each to their own and I'd never criticise anyone for being like you OP.

The point that was being made is exactly as PPs have said: SM is information and entertainment, and given we don’t pay for it with money I guess they’re saying I should pay for it in kind. They even threw in (I’m paraphrasing) “what’s so special about your kids that they need privacy?”

I do see the point about it being like pitching up to a dinner party empty handed, eating the food, drinking the wine, enjoying the company, and not contributing to the conversation at all. My attitude is that nobody is obligated to invite me. So, if people want me as their FB friends, it doesn’t come with strings attached. But, perhaps there is some kind of SM code that I’m unaware of…

Just because people share doesn't make it true...🤫

Tbh it doesn't sound like they're much of a friend? What they said about your children being special was unkind and unfair.

I suppose there is an association with those who don't post personal things on sm with the elite / royalty etc so perhaps some might think those people are aspirational wannabes? But goodness I'd never think that, esp of a friend! I just accept and respect that we're different (and be envious of all the free time she has because she's not spending 3hrs a day on Facebook! )

“what’s so special about your kids that they need privacy?”

@BeenThruMoreThanALilBit If anyone said that to me I would delete them from my friends list. I wouldn’t trust them.

I’m of the belief that children who are too young to give informed consent to having their images and personal information posted on social media it is up to parents to decide whether it’s ok or not. I am waiting for my child to be old enough to understand the internet better, the possible ramifications of sharing your personal information etc. before I post pictures of her on Facebook. I want her to decide if she wants her pictures on social media when she is old enough to understand. Not because she is more special than anyone else but because of my personal beliefs in respecting others and their autonomy.

I want my dd to have self respect, respect for others and respect for her surrounding environment. Not to be manipulated by peer pressure or taken advantage of.

What we choose to share on social media is a personal choice. Anyone who can’t respect that has some kind of agenda and I wouldn’t trust them.

Agree with you @Oceanbliss altho when you say

"I want my dd to have self respect, respect for others and respect for her surrounding environment. Not to be manipulated by peer pressure or taken advantage of."

You do realise we can teach this to our children and post some pics to Facebook sometimes right?

Yanbu. I'm on there for useful info like when Santa can be booked at the local soft play, or of there's road closures on my commute.

I previously got into a horrible rut of feeling like I had to "like" everything my friends posted so as to not upset anyone. Then I caught myself feeling awful about people not liking my posts or being jealous of them doing things together...and I thought "fuck this, I'm creating problems for myself." So now I check occasionally* for useful info, dont interact, leave!

*not as occasionally as I'd like tbh.

You don't have a social media problem, you have a friend problem. Get rid of the weirdo.

I'm completely comfortable using Facebook for information but not sharing anything really.
It's a public network, if you don't like me on there quietly observing I don't mind being unfriended.
Its so full of commercials, business posts, group announcements that I really don't feel it's only a personal network and that people would even notice that I don't post on my wall...

I remove friends that don't contribute anything on social as I'm friends with people to keep up with their news. If it's not two way then they don't make the cut.

However, lots of people wouldn't care and would be happy to have another 'friend' on FB to share news with. I guess in the same way that some people talk at people and some require contributions.

I wouldn't remove you for not featuring your kids on social though. I'd just expect at least a few posts a year on your life in general.

Mumsnet is the only 'social media' I take part in outside of work.
I am not on Facebook, but do feel increasing pressure to join because of the number of local businesses that only have Facebook. So I have to telephone to find out opening hours, prices, what they offer etc.
If I did join, I would also be a 'taker' not a 'giver'.

I'm on facebook, and use it to share the odd jokey or ranty status / meme / animal pictures etc. Once in a blue moon I might post a pic of me and DH, or our dog doing something cute, or some nice scenery if we've been somewhere new. That's it - nothing else. A lot of friends post multiple pictures and statuses daily - when they are having relationship or health or work issues, if they've had their hair / nails done, if they have a new car or have decorated a room at home, pictures of pretty much everything they do with their kids. Their choice, and I am a frequent liker of their stuff / add comments etc.

Anyone I consider close enough to know about the ins and outs of my life will know anyway, they don't need to wait to see it on social media. Anyone who's not that close I wouldn't want to know anyway! Everyone's different, and everyone will be more or less comfortable with sharing their life online.

No-one has ever said anything about it to me, to operate a 'tit for tat' facebook policy seems totally and utterly bizarre, your friends are weird.

How very strange the comments you have received! I know quite a few people who are on FB because it is a useful way of keeping an eye on school pages, local events and services etc but rarely interact except to accept/decline event invitations. Fair enough I say.

I post quite a lot including stuff about my kids and home but i don't think everyone should be obliged to do the same. i mostly do it as a way of keeping a sort of photo diary that I enjoy looking back on (so do my kids). If i think I am posting too much and risking boring others I set my posts to private for a while so only I can see them. I know some parents who have decided not to put their kids on SM at all (or no face shots) and again, I think fair enough. Mine happen to love looking back at albums from their younger days and favourite holidays though so I am comfortable with what I do.

Some people are comfortable with lots of privacy, others with less. It's all good as far as i am concerned.

Whoever made those comments is the weird one, quite obviously. There's no obligation to "pay" for the privilege of using free social media platforms. You can choose not to share anything on social media for any reason, and it's nobody's business but your own.

Well I’m glad the majority see thing the same way as me. @GreyEyedWitch has a similar sounding approach as the person I was talking with. Reading her/his post, friendships sound transactional. This isn’t how I live my life but I know many people who do. To those, I think SM can be especially toxic.

Just start posting what you have at each meal, what you watched on TV and share lots of memes of puppies. No commentary, just the bare bones of what you watched or ate, and lots of it. They'll soon be begging you to share less again!

@LondonGrimmer You do realise we can teach this to our children and post some pics to Facebook sometimes right?

Of course, that’s why I said it’s a personal choice of the parents. Not up to someone else to peer pressure the op into posting about her kids on sm. Also, I have made my personal choice which may differ from other parents.

My life is quite dull my children are grown I rarely share personal stuff I share videos the occasional update holidays etc and info that's happening. You don't really have to share anything you don't want,