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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

"Can I get"

278 replies

Facilitatingdarkness · 07/09/2021 21:02

What's wrong with "Can I have"?

It doesn't even make grammatical sense! I've noticed it more and more when people are ordering coffee, to the point that more people say it than not.

Makes me irrationally angry. Just me?

OP posts:
Geamhradh · 07/09/2021 21:26

Oxford English Dictionary (full version) gives 289 meanings for "get", so I think it's probably the case that being given a Starbucks by a barista comes in there somewhere.

Original poster
Facilitatingdarkness · 07/09/2021 21:27

Thank you - this is gold! Grin

OP posts:
Babyroobs · 07/09/2021 21:27

My two adult sons say this. I don't like it. Somehow it just sounds a bit rude even though they say please afterwards.

RaraRachael · 07/09/2021 21:31

It's a regional thing. Where I live it's perfectly acceptable to say "Can I get". It's like using may or can. I've never said, "May I ........... " in my entire life.

DrEllie · 07/09/2021 21:31

It sounds rude to me but then I'm an oldie. I think 'please can I have...?' is more polite

Original poster
Facilitatingdarkness · 07/09/2021 21:31

Today in Starbucks:

"Can I get a large cappuccino, extra hot with so much chocolate you can't see the white through it?"

I wanted to scream "Pleeeeease!" over the woman's shoulder!

OP posts:
Trufflethewuffle · 07/09/2021 21:33

A couple of weeks ago one of my sons had COVID and stayed in his room for the duration. We took his meals up on a tray.
One morning, he texted me “can I get a coffee?”. I said no and that I would get it for him.
He said that’s what he meant. In that particular instance “can I have” would have been a bit clearer!

JenniferAllisonPhillipaSue · 07/09/2021 21:33

"Can I get XYZ?"

"I don't know. Can you get it? Is it in reach? Can you see it? Do your arms work? Oh, you mean could I please hand to you / give you XYZ ...." Hmm

BarbaraofSeville · 07/09/2021 21:38

Can I get

People who talk about 'grabbing' a coffee, sandwich, drink etc#

People who say do or did when they mean went or been to, as in 'last year we did Menorca'. I have to fight the urge to ask 'what exactly did you do to Menorca last year'.

Infuriating the lot of them.

Bloodypunkrockers · 07/09/2021 21:39

Can I get is common here. May I have sounds too try hard

I'm not American but I'm not English

Allfednonedead · 07/09/2021 21:44

It's absolutely standard in Ireland. I dread to think how rude I have sounded to countless English people.
What winds me up is 'do you have sugar?' in your cup of tea. Well, no, I don't have sugar in my tea, but I would like some, please!

Evanna13 · 07/09/2021 21:44

I think they both sound fine and I clearly understand what they both mean.
I do not think either is rude.
I think a 'please' at the end of either of them is nice and polite.
"May I" is fine too but quite old fashioned.

overnightangel · 07/09/2021 21:44

@Poochnewbie1

I use it all the time. I usually use a polite tone and say please at the end so don’t really see how it’s rude..

“Could I get a glass of wine please?”
I realise that ‘May I have…’ sounds more polite but I feel like I’m trying to be posh.

Well you’ve disingenuously changed 2 things there so you’re not comparing like with like, why not just say “could I have a glass of wine please”?🤷🏻‍♀️
BeckyWithTheGoodHair5629456 · 07/09/2021 21:45

I hate "can I get". So rude. It's "please may I have"

sweeneytoddsrazor · 07/09/2021 21:45

Please can I have , or ,please can you get me.

Sparklingbrook · 07/09/2021 21:48

‘Please may I have’ sounds like something a 4 year old would say.
How about ‘I’ll have a latte please’ is that any better?

That said I don’t see the ‘can I get?’ angst/rudeness.

Chunkymenrock · 07/09/2021 21:52

@Poochnewbie1

I use it all the time. I usually use a polite tone and say please at the end so don’t really see how it’s rude..

“Could I get a glass of wine please?”
I realise that ‘May I have…’ sounds more polite but I feel like I’m trying to be posh.

But 'could I get' a glass of wine sounds like you want to go over and help yourself! It's ridiculous.
CurlsandCurves · 07/09/2021 21:55

I have to admit, ‘can I get?’ Really did grate on me when I first heard it about 20 years ago. I’m still not a fan but each to their own.

However do not get me started on the ‘Get me....’ when someone is asked what they want.

Can I get is at least still a request, get me is a demand, which will never sit right with me when addressing someone who is serving you.

malmi · 07/09/2021 21:58

Is "I'll have" rude? As in "I'll have the chicken."

sbhydrogen · 07/09/2021 22:00

I really dislike the use of "can I get ..?".

annacondom · 07/09/2021 22:00

Yanbu. I hate it too. It sounds as if the person is trying to be American. "Can I have a latte, please"?
This is eclipsed for me, though, by being asked "Are you alright?"' instead of "Can I help you?", or "Yes?". I did once reply, "I'm fine, thanks. Can I have a latte, please?" :)

Geamhradh · 07/09/2021 22:05

@BeckyWithTheGoodHair5629456

I hate "can I get". So rude. It's "please may I have"
Well, as the article by Scott Thornbury points out, in descriptive linguistics, "may I have", whilst being perfectly correct, is antiquated and rarely used. (Corpus linguistics- massive study on what people actually say, helps to chart language change) I expect when people first started to say "hello everyone!" the latter day equivalent of MN would be full of pearl clutchers saying that "salutations, ye sons and daughters of men" was the only possible greeting that was acceptable. Wink
lazylinguist · 07/09/2021 22:15

Things are phrased differently in different countries and regions where English is spoken. Sometimes those different ways of phrasing things spread and become popular elsewhere. This is normal.

No, 'Can I get...?' is not 'grammatically incorrect'. The grammar works perfectly well. Modal verb 'can', inverted with the pronoun 'I' because it's a question, followed by the verb 'get'. Perfectly correct.

Oh and 'get' can mean 'receive'. So a person asking "Can I get a coffee' isn't hilariously implying they're going to leap the Starbucks counter and fetch it themselves. They are asking if they may receive a coffee from the barista.

You probably don't like it because you're snobby about Americanisms, so you want it to be 'wrong'. It's not 'wrong'. Language evolves.

CurlsandCurves · 07/09/2021 22:16

@annacondom

Yanbu. I hate it too. It sounds as if the person is trying to be American. "Can I have a latte, please"? This is eclipsed for me, though, by being asked "Are you alright?"' instead of "Can I help you?", or "Yes?". I did once reply, "I'm fine, thanks. Can I have a latte, please?" :)
Guilty as charged for that one!

I work in retail and in the morning I’ll always say ‘good morning!’. But in the afternoon good afternoon , well, you don’t hear people say that so I go with ‘hello there!’ Or ‘hello, are you alright, can I help?’

Ooh it’s a minefield, but that’s the English language for you, and that’s the beauty of it.

PepsiHoover · 07/09/2021 22:19

@HarryLimeFoxtrot

It’s an Americanism.
As with most "Americanisms" as MN likes to call them, it's actually been used in Scotland for at least the last 40s years.