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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I expecting too much?

57 replies

anon19918 · 04/09/2021 19:00

I have been with DP for seven months, things are largely going well. A few hiccups but nothing major.

I am chronically ill, but able to do most things most of the time. I become unwell often as my immune system is crap with things like tonsillitis and chest infections. We currently live 2.5 hours apart so FaceTime a lot, I called him today and told him I had tonsil and he rolled his eyes and said he's lost his patience with me being unwell.

He said its because I've been constantly ill for three months and says I don't rest enough so can't recover. I go out once at the weekend, maybe three times a month and I am a single parent. I rest as much as I can.

I was also attacked in my home almost three months ago by an intruder and when I asked if he would come to be with me (this was when he living five minutes away) and he told me to ask someone else. He said this because we had had a falling out a couple days prior (nothing major) and hadn't been speaking much.

He had an incident at his new place and asked me to be with him for support, I drove the 2.5 hours to be there with him.

It's been a hard year money and health wise, as well as the attack. I have also lost a couple of long-term close friends due to them letting me down. I expressed to him I was stressed and he and he said "what because of the money situation?". And I just felt like: ugh!!!!! How can he be so unaware.

I really care for him and he has so many good qualities. Am I expecting too much from him?

OP posts:
HopelesslyOptimistic · 05/09/2021 08:55

Dump him, you will have many other people in your life that you can have fun with. Get well soon.

MzHz · 05/09/2021 09:47

I agree with all those saying to dump him

He’s AWFUL!

You were actually attacked in your home and he wouldn’t go 5mins to see you?

That’s literally game over, not even bother to text him or reply to anything ever again territory

And you then drove 2.5hours to see this clown when he asked?

Who the fuck taught you that you were worth so little?

I’d like a “chat” with that person!

He IS showing you who he is, and that’s someone who wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire.

That’s crap! That’s the end.

Just text him and tell him “I’ve been considering our relationship and it’s clearly not working, so I’ll leave it there, good luck with everything you do”

Then block.

Honestly

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 05/09/2021 09:52

@girlmom21

Somebody attacked you in your own home and he wouldn't come to be with you. He doesn't hold a torch for you in the way you do for him.

If you're questioning the relationship after 7 months I'd 100% walk away.

This...
Sugarplumfairy65 · 05/09/2021 10:33

He doesn't care. He's told you that a number of times by his actions.

Travis1 · 05/09/2021 11:06

7 months in? No. And he wouldn’t come to you after someone had been in your home and assaulted you?! That was the point you should have walked away. Get rid. You’ll be better off without him

MoiraRose4 · 05/09/2021 11:09

You are NOT expecting too much. He is a waste of space and you need to walk away from this now.

honeylulu · 05/09/2021 11:13

He's a fairweather friend, only interested when you're fun, entertaining and available to him. When you're not, he not only can't be bothered but he's actively annoyed that you're not in top form and at his disposal.

In his eyes you're below him in the pecking order. You should take the view that someone who doesn't consider you an equal is not worth your while. Ugh. Dump!

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