I never used to get on with my brother, for a long time I think I just did not get him. Our parents often made things a completion when we were growing up and he is immensely intelligent but can sometimes be a bit too relaxed for his own good, so either he was better at the thing that was made a competition, or I was better because he did not care enough to try. In our 20s he also often offered advice and I did not want to listen.
When I got married he helped me with the wedding planning, he had been an events manager and I realised how helpful he was, he gave me options and explained the pros and cons of each and his help made my wedding the amazing day it was. I also realised that to him there was never any competition, he did the best he could when interesting, he did what was required when he was not interested, but it was never about beating me no matter how much that is what our parents had made it into. I gained a husband on my wedding, but I also forged a totally new relationship with my brother.
Things also got even better when I had children, he is an incredibly kind, caring and helpful uncle, he has so much patience with kids, they love spending time with him and he is in many ways like a third parent to them. I know that our relationship could have turned out very differently and I realise that the many years of us not getting on were largely down to me, but I am glad I have him now.