To be pissed off that the children’s centres where I live still aren’t open?!

[AngeloMysterioso]

My son is 22 months old (so was 4 months at the start of lockdown). Has barely been seen by any kind of medical professional since then except when he’s had his jabs- Doctors appointments are telephone calls, health visitor checks are telephone calls, and the only baby groups that have restarted where I live are the kind that are £7.50 for the pleasure of spending 45 minutes trying to keep your toddler on a yoga mat. Support for new mums pretty much vanished overnight and nobody seems to be in any hurry to bring it back.

With all the covid restrictions easing I’ve been really hoping that my local district’s children’s centres would be re-opening as normal soon, but no- they’ve just updated their Facebook page with September’s “virtual offer” of three zoom workshop sessions and “virtual baby massage”- and no mention at all of any change to the current online-only situation.

AIBU to think enough is enough now? How long do they plan on using covid as an excuse not to deliver the service they are designed and built (and paid) for? I’m expecting DC2 in December and at this point fully expect them to be walking and talking before anyone besides the immunisation nurse actually claps eyes on them.

Completely agree. I had twins in May 2020 and only the GP and vaccination nurse has seen them.
Health Visitor has been useless, only telephone calls and like you said, no actual toddler groups. Absolutely fed up of this nonsense.

We had no children’s centres in my area when mine were little. Most of the baby groups I went to were run by mums in schools/churches/village halls. Can you start one op?

YANBU. Adult DC here now but I don't know how you have all managed. I could not have imagined bringing up a baby under the circumstances of the last 18 months. Like others I shudder to think about the ones with neglectful or abusive parents and am waiting for a catalogue of horror stories to hit the press about child deaths, while a lot of hand wringing goes on with cries of "how could this happen " alongside "lessons have been learned "

Sadly before covid the government changed the funded on children s centres...we the mums in my town tried to keep the centre open but sadly the decision was made and ours was about to close then covid hit....I suspect alot of children centres won't reopen. However op the church playgroup s are beginning to open again and they £1 or similar. Meet all my mum friends that way. Check if there's a book called toddle about in your area as it list all the group's. Otherwise try the library as they sometimes have a list of groups. X

Lots of baby groups around here are term time only as many of the volunteers have their own children. I suspect children’s centres might also have been as they are on school sites. Perhaps they are all due to start opening up now?

As a first time mum in the pandemic, this thread has been very validating to read.

It was such a weird and lonely experience, I’d love another child at some point but I think back to those early baby days and get a pit in my stomach.

She’s a toddler now and life here is normal and I’m absolutely loving it. Having things to do and people to see has made a world of difference for us.

Fully agree. I called my HV to see if when the drop in clinics are restarting (you can go along, get baby weighed, ask for advice etc) and was told there’s no plans to restart! I think it’s absolutely disgusting.

Luckily I can afford to attend the expensive private classes and do soft plays etc but I know a lot can’t and it’s unfair. I also dread to think how many babies are suffering and slipping through the net in abusive households with home visits suspended for so long and also feel for FTM struggling with the lack of groups and services available. It’s a disgrace.

@inpixiehollow

Completely agree with you. Exactly same situation for me in my area too, my daughter has just turned one and I'm due baby no2 in November. I was saying to my partner the other day how I'm not surprised that child abuse cases resulting in serious harm/death of a baby or child has shot up in the last year because our daughter hadn't been seen by a professional for 9 months until her vaccinations appointment. Also plenty of the expensive 'business' type baby groups open but the local church playgroup types have vanished :(

Tell that to Kaylee Jayde Priest who was murdered by her mom and boyfriend last year during lockdown. It is happening, it is just not being as widely reported on.

I'm pregnant and keeping an eye on local provision, and it does mercifully seem to be opening up again round here (very mixed bit of s London). The local children's centres are offering daily in-person activities, church playgroups are starting to advertise themselves, the one o'clock club is back without lots of hoop-jumping booking stuff to do.

Check on your local council website if the children's centre is actually re opening at all. Our 2 closest centres have been permanently closed, they did have a consultation which was poorly advertised and kept in the heart of lockdown so even if parents had known there was little chance to participate and voice concerns.
It's a cost cutting measure by local councils which in the long run could prove very costly to some families and babies.

Yanbu. My child hasnt been seen by anyone in ages, and that's despite her being premature and having a few health issues.

Definitely lots of organisations hiding behind covid instead of finding ways to manage risks.

We can't live our lives via zoom.

Never had a children's centre when my were young - stay and play type sessions are held in church halls etc for very low cost, we restarted in April here

@Whinge

I've never lived in an area where children's centres existed, the nearest one to where my kids grew up was 8 miles away in a different town. They are not the only option

[quote gogohm]@Whinge

I've never lived in an area where children's centres existed, the nearest one to where my kids grew up was 8 miles away in a different town. They are not the only option [/quote]
My post wasn't just referring to children's centres. During lockdown there were so many posters telling mums of young children that they should stop moaning about groups being closed, as they never used groups and there children were fine. Which is great, but saying they never used them so others shouldn't complain, missed the point that they at least had the choice to use them.

Everything in my area is run by volunteer mums so it could be that the venues eg church halls are staying closed or the volunteers feel they haven't got the extra time and hassle for cleaning toys etc. If you know other mums could you start a group yourselves?

My first baby was born just at the beginning of lockdown #1. I’ve never seen or spoken to a health visitor, despite repeated attempts to access the service. They just never got back to me via email or phone. I had mental health issues in pregnancy caused by pregnancy so I was supposed to be supported perinatally, but no one ever got in contact. Fortunately I was pretty solid. My now toddler has had jabs but that’s it. No groups run anywhere (although one little church near me has started one and it’s charming and such a godsend) and this is the long-standing post on our children’s centre’s website.

Despite no support, I have been fine but I am really concerned about the fall out of this for families who aren’t as lucky.

It is rubbish, but it is most likely due to lack of funding for local authorities to provide services. So where OP refers to the council being 'paid to provide these' the budget for childrens services is in deficit/overspent in almost all council areas now, due to changes in how central govt fund these services and then increasing demand (since baby p case) and then the effects of covid. A few years ago the system was changed and local councils were essentially told to find ways of raising money locally - council tax rises, increasing revenue by things like selling off non essential buildings or renting out others, charging for car parking etc.

Those income streams have been hugely affected by covid, the demand/cost for services in adult and children's social care has gone up hugely and councils are facing bankruptcy. They can't cut child protection services (though will try and find 'efficiencies' such as not replacing staff who leave) and so by default they're left with cutting 'non essential' services such as children's centres.

It's always short term thinking, and everyone working in the area knows it, but they're stuck between a rock and hard place.

Ours have undertaken a “restructuring” during lockdown. With my first child I went to the weigh in/ under ones group once a week, and to a group for mums with mental health challenges for about 8 weeks. It really meant a lot to me.

I had my second (lockdown) baby, nearly everything shut. I did try a virtual group by the children’s centre but it really wasn’t good. I’ve since been told there will be no general groups. No under ones, no weigh ins. What was the point of weighing babies if suddenly for my second child it doesn’t matter and he hasn’t been weighed for over 6 months?

It makes me really sad. Plenty of £££ expensive paid groups as others have said.

Too late for me now, I’m back at work soon. I hope there is better support for mums than what I had this year.

At this point I’d assume ongoing closures have more to do with cost-cutting than Covid. Agree that it’s appalling though; under 5s and new mothers have essentially been forgotten throughout the pandemic, with little sign of anything changing in many areas. I dread to think about all the things that are being missed due to lack of support and professional scrutiny.

Personally I consider myself lucky as DD was born in 2017, I have a good support network and we can afford the pricey commercial groups. But friends who had babies during lockdown have struggled, had no weigh-ins, seen delays to vaccinations and health checks, been unable to access breastfeeding support and health visitors etc - and these are families who are not especially vulnerable on paper. I have no doubt that there will be much, much worse going on elsewhere.

YANBU. The provision for new parents has been shocking. Our local children’s centre shut down at the start and only just started offering a few groups again a couple of weeks ago. Yet somehow, privately run groups charging £££ (for example £8 per session, have to book ten at a time upfront) have been able to run most of the way through. Funny that. They’ve honestly lost all of my respect, I needed them as a new parent and got nothing. I am very fortunate that we could afford to spend £50-80 per month on toddler groups to save my sanity but how many parents can afford that while on maternity leave?

Ps I'm not talking about play groups etc here. I'm talking "the local health visiting team seem to have vanished off the face of the earth". So development checks seem to have been relegated to a quick phone call to mum to ask if she thinks everything's alright.

Cos there's no risk in that approach, is there.

All I wanted was to show up to a church hall for half an hour while DS wriggled around on the floor, to have a quick cuppa with another parent and whinge about sleep deprivation. It would have made all the difference.

That’s awful OP. The services were cut to the bone anyway.

They used to be amazing when Dd was a baby 12+ years ago. Groups you could go to every day and plenty of locations. Must have helped so many people

Totally agree as well!!

I remember a lot of playgroups actually were quite distanced we would sit on a mat and sing songs and what not

When DD was a baby (13 years ago) there were 3 children’s centres within walking distance. By the time she started school 2 of those had closed. The remaining one (the hub) had suspended most of its activities and toy library etc. The last year I went there we were basically running our own group and the support worker would pop in at the start and end of the session as she had been restructured and couldn’t give the time up.
I was also lucky there were 2 playgroups nearby, one run by retired women which was fab.
It’s very sad. Haven’t we all agreed by now that these are mostly for the mums and not the children anyway. It was one of the first things my HV told me to find out about/go to as it gets you out of the house.