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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

What time is too early to visit someone on a weekend?

63 replies

Elouera · 29/08/2021 14:09

My FIL and his wife visited, unannounced today at 8:20am. She had an early appointment nearby and they decided to 'pop in'. She then went on and on about how it was such an early appointment and she couldn't have her usual 10am lounging in bed, where DH brings her a cuppa and she will read and snooze!

I started a new job this week, so was shattered. I was awake, but had clearly just got up. I'd never visit theirs without a text or call first (DH didn't grow up with him).

AIBU to think its too early and rude, or would you visit a childless couple at that time?

OP posts:

FangsForTheMemory · 29/08/2021 15:02

Before 10 is not on.

Zombiemum1946 · 29/08/2021 15:02

8.20 without it being arranged or urgent is pretty off. Even after the kids I wouldn't get up before midday unless dh was out or at work. Child care handover was at 7am (6am on really rough nights) with no excuses, I went to bed and didn't get up for anything other than a pee or the kids vomiting.

GoodnightGrandma · 29/08/2021 15:03

I wouldn’t want anyone popping in unannounced at any time.
But I certainly wouldn’t be contacting anyone before 11am on a Sunday.

helentomelon · 29/08/2021 15:03

Absolute rudeness to pop in on anyone without notice. Gives me the absolute rage! It's so utterly un necessary and shows a total lack of respect for someone.

Don't get me started on people who ring the bell a second time when you don't answer.

And 8am!!??!!??

Nirnroot · 29/08/2021 15:05

Completely unannounced visiting is rude for me personally, no matter what the time. I appreciate that as someone who plans and can't deal with surprises this may just be me.

I'm up early but I don't want someone knocking on my door while I'm enjoying my coffee and toast!

Palavah · 29/08/2021 15:05

I wouldn't have had them across the threshold. In fact at that time Id probably have opened an upstair window to see who it was and then said oh nice to see you, see you soon and good luck with the appointment!

AuntieDolly · 29/08/2021 15:06

My people know not to even call or message before 10am! I'd have been horrified.

Standrewsschool · 29/08/2021 15:07

Too early.

I’d say 10am if they were intending to stay for a coffee, or 9am if they just wanted to bring something around.

IAmSuperman · 29/08/2021 15:16

I’d have lived up to mumsnet reputation and not answered the door.

Picklypickles · 29/08/2021 15:18

Any time is too early if they are unnanounced visitors imo!

I was having a lovely relaxing bath yesterday tea time, listening to an audiobook and my brother decided to show up unannounced for no good reason and I had to cut my bath short before I was properly pruney. I was not happy.

8.20am on a sunday is not on at all, I'd be furious unless it was an emergency.

bluebeck · 29/08/2021 15:20

If I am not ready for visitors, I don't answer the door......

GiantHaystacks2021 · 29/08/2021 15:21

Not before noon, I think.

AnonymousCheerleader · 29/08/2021 15:30

So, did you say anything to them?

WomanStanleyWoman · 29/08/2021 15:31

I hate the ‘pop-in’ at any time, but if someone was banging my door at 8.20, I’d think something terrible had happened. I wouldn’t even ring anyone before about 10.30.

Driftingblue · 29/08/2021 15:34

It is always too early to visit unannounced.

As for time. At 8:20 I’m not even sure we would know they were at the door. Our bell rings through our phones and those are set to do not disturb until 10am on weekends.

Debetswell · 29/08/2021 15:35

We have adult dc so don't get up until about 9 onwards at a weekend.
I let the dog out and bring my cuppa back to bed.
Certainly would not be impressed with early visitors.

Driftingblue · 29/08/2021 15:36

And seriously, if my i laws were at my door at 8:20 on a Sunday morning I would assume it would be to tell me that a sibling or a niece or nephew had died. It would have to be someone really close like that. They would call for anyone else.

Mantlemoose · 29/08/2021 15:36

Won't be the first time I've not answered the door at any time of day - just because I couldn't be bothered with visitors - never mind that time of a morning (bearing in mind i'm normally up and out by 6am every morning with the dog)!

ApplesAreTheBaneOfMyLife · 29/08/2021 15:41

Too early unannounced. That’s one occasion where I would be a proper MNer and not answer the door.

LakieLady · 29/08/2021 15:44

@Nirnroot

Completely unannounced visiting is rude for me personally, no matter what the time. I appreciate that as someone who plans and can't deal with surprises this may just be me.

I'm up early but I don't want someone knocking on my door while I'm enjoying my coffee and toast!

Not just you, @Nirnroot, I don't like it either.

I like to have sufficient warning to make myself and the house presentable, and sometimes I just want to chill and not to have to make small talk with people.

Howshouldibehave · 29/08/2021 15:47

I actually wouldn’t even text someone at that time on a Sunday morning in case it woke them up from a much-needed lie in!

Boredhimtodeath · 29/08/2021 15:49

It’s even more annoying she moaned at how early the appointment was and that she would normally be in bed herself!

RainBow725 · 29/08/2021 15:55

I don't even answer the phone before 12pm on a Sunday.

Debetswell · 29/08/2021 15:57

@Elouera you should have pointed out that you missed more than a cuppa. Nudge nudge.
They wouldn't turn up early again !

BalladOfBarryAndFreda · 29/08/2021 15:57

I’d be out walking the dog at that time, so they’d be left waiting.

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