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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how you feel about mature students in university halls

29 replies

Whocareswherewego76 · 27/08/2021 23:18

Say 25-27 personally I’m on the fence as feel. They may be singled out. At the same time though it’s still a young age in terms of life.

OP posts:
Themeparklover · 27/08/2021 23:21

I think it's fine I think more housing should be available for mature students also

XenoBitch · 27/08/2021 23:21

Singled out how? Mature students tend to be at uni because they want the qualification, not because they want the whole "university experience".

lughnasadh · 27/08/2021 23:22

Don't most halls have an area just for mature and PhD students?

Original poster
Whocareswherewego76 · 27/08/2021 23:23

I would imagine it could get quite lonely if people are having a party and you aren’t included etc.

OP posts:
Lindjam · 27/08/2021 23:24

I am not sure what you mean?

Both my young adult DC have attended uni for under grad and masters studies and have lived in halls at some point. They didn't exactly go around asking everyone their age. Yes, sometimes there were older students, but so what? Never been a problem for them, or for me as a parent.

Are you a mature student who is worried about this? I really wouldn't stress, it's absolutely normal these days.

If you are a parent who thinks their adult DC shouldn't be sharing with over 21s then get a grip!

CoopersHawke · 27/08/2021 23:25

@lughnasadh

Don't most halls have an area just for mature and PhD students?
I was just going to say the same. They won't be stuck on a floor with the 18 yr olds.
Brakebackcyclebot · 27/08/2021 23:25

Why would you assume a 25-27 year old wouldn't be included? One of my flat mates at uni was 25 when we started in halls in our 1st year. She was treated just the same as everyone else. I didn't even realise she was a bit older until later.

Rainbowsew · 27/08/2021 23:26

Why wouldn't they be included?

My boyfriend at uni was 27 to my 21 and met him through my housemates the same age as me, he was on their course.

rothbury · 27/08/2021 23:28

@Whocareswherewego76

I would imagine it could get quite lonely if people are having a party and you aren’t included etc.
Can you explain yourself? What sort of arseholes wouldn't include someone in their halls because they were a few years older?

Are you an older student who is worried about fitting in? Please don't be anxious, there's really no such divide.

Confusedmeanderings · 27/08/2021 23:28

I think its absolutely fine. I met DH at university, he was 33 and in his first year. I was 22 and in my final year. He spent all three years of his degree in halls and loved it. He got involved with everything that was going on and knew everyone. 25-27 is not so very much older - go for it!

StarryStarrySocks · 27/08/2021 23:30

One of my best friends in halls was a mature student. She was 25 and the rest of our friend group were 18/19. So it depends on the people involved!

Original poster
Whocareswherewego76 · 27/08/2021 23:31

No I’m just thinking back to what some of my friends were like at 18. I would have aimed to make everyone feel comfortable at that age. No this a family friends son.

OP posts:
XenoBitch · 27/08/2021 23:31

@Whocareswherewego76

I would imagine it could get quite lonely if people are having a party and you aren’t included etc.
Wouldn't bother me. I was a mature student (not in halls though... I stayed local to home). My partying days are done. I was there to get the bit of paper at the end.
GreenWhiteViolet · 27/08/2021 23:34

I went to university as a mature student (27) and didn't live in halls because I knew I couldn't deal with the likely immaturity of some of the 18-year-olds - shared kitchen/bathroom being left in a state, late night noise and the like. And they'd probably have found me equally annoying!

I think if there are separate halls for mature/graduate students that might be different, but for someone older who is used to independent living or sensible flatmates, sharing with people who have just left school might be difficult.

Socially I had no problems, but I was at a university with lots of other mature students from the local area.

n11e · 27/08/2021 23:34

There was a mature student, late 20s a couple of floors above me in halls, he was the halls party animal, he was always involved with everything! They can easily find their group be that quiet, party etc etc type and I doubt most would judge

pastabest · 27/08/2021 23:36

In my experience (working in university accommodation one upon a time) it's not so much the 18 year olds who mind having mature students in halls, if want to join in they are welcomed.

Most of the issues arise though because understandably most mature students, even if it's just by a few years, don't want to behave like stupid 18 year olds having their first taste of freedom. Mostly, older students have worked for a couple of years, understand that in the real world you can't get drunk every night and steal traffic cones and are generally on the course because they really want to be there and learn so don't take kindly to being woken up every night at 2am.

It leads to conflict and bad feeling. Unless the mature student is a bit of a party animal themselves they are usually better off in specific mature/grad accommodation or finding shared private rented with other mature students.

Most in-year hall moves I had to deal with were mature students, closely followed by international students.

Themeparklover · 28/08/2021 00:30

@Whocareswherewego76

I would imagine it could get quite lonely if people are having a party and you aren’t included etc.
A lot of cities or uni's don't have an adaquete number of housing for mature students so we sadly end up in regular halls in studios if like my city 'london' it is too expensive for a private flat. Luckily I'm in a mature student halls and up north you can typically get private rentals much easier but down south you will struggle also mature student is from 21 and if you are a single young adult and need to move cities to complete learning sometimes it just isn't feasible to find independent living on short notice.Hardly any mature students at uni are the stereotyped (single 30+ parents)
Themeparklover · 28/08/2021 00:31

To clarify I'm in a studio flat in mate halls zone 3 of london finishing up masters whilst working, even whilst working my rent is nearly 13,000 a year

Themeparklover · 28/08/2021 00:32

mature halls*

Original poster
Whocareswherewego76 · 28/08/2021 10:23

Thank you for all your views

OP posts:
Edmontine · 28/08/2021 10:28

For anyone feeling alienated by this thread - some of us are hoping to persuade @MNHQ to allow us a Mature Study and Retraining board.

Do come and add your voice!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/site_stuff/4327788-Is-there-a-specific-Mature-Study-Retraining-board?msgid=110096218

Edmontine · 28/08/2021 10:29

Hope you found enough for your article / blog post, OP. Grin

WorriedWishingWell · 28/08/2021 10:33

This reminds me of when I was 26, doing a post grad course and house sharing with 2 first year undergraduates. One of them asked me if I worried that I was too old to still be studying Grin. They thought I was ancient.

PaulaTrilloe · 28/08/2021 10:34

I did at 32 it was fine. I had international students for neighbours and we were at the of a long block so not too noisy! Happy times

Original poster
Whocareswherewego76 · 28/08/2021 10:49

I’ve said it’s for a family friend who’s worried about being too old. He’s however now obviously got a place that’s too far to commute.

OP posts: