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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have slight worries about changing figure (pregnancy)?

54 replies

LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 08:41

Cutting a long story short I got down to 7 and a half stone to attract my partner. Am now pregnant - unplanned but thrilled about it. No bump yet but I’ve started putting on a bit of weight - up a cup size and now a slight tummy where there was none before! Partner is lean and says he wants to put on weight - I think he’s lovely as he is! He says he loves my now slightly curvier figure but I wonder how he’ll feel about 7 months from now! Grin Since we’ve been a couple he’s only known me being very slim. Anyone else feel like this in early pregnancy?

OP posts:
thanksforyourcommentrandomman · 26/08/2021 08:45

No but I wouldn't have lost weight to attract a partner in the first instance

DontWiltMySpinachPlease · 26/08/2021 08:47

@thanksforyourcommentrandomman

No but I wouldn't have lost weight to attract a partner in the first instance
Couldn't agree more.
spotcheck · 26/08/2021 08:48

It sounds like you didn't need to be 7.5 stone to 'attract' him, if he likes you curves now.
Perhaps he loves you for you?

oprahwindfuryy · 26/08/2021 08:48

How tall are you? 7 and a half stone isn’t sustainable for most adults, pregnant or not

Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 08:48

Fair enough - I understand completely that many wouldn’t lose weight to attract a partner but I did need to lose it

OP posts:
KarmaStar · 26/08/2021 08:49

Boost your confidence op this is not good.
Please don't starve yourself( and baby) to remain slim.
There is nothing you can do about a baby bump,you can alter your mind set.

AnneLovesGilbert · 26/08/2021 08:50

Why?

Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 08:50

opraheindfuryy I’m 5ft 1 /155 cm so it’s within a normal BMI for me but I’m certainly not 7 stone 7 anymore! Grin

OP posts:
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 26/08/2021 08:51

7.5 stone- that’s tiny and I suspect the issues are with you and food not your partners view of you

CloseYourEyesAndSee · 26/08/2021 08:52

Did he tell you he only likes underweight women??
How do you think weighing 7.5 stone attracted him?
Personally I was secure that my partner's attraction wasn't based on my weight or looks so I didn't worry about this.

Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 08:54

spotcheck when I knew him as part of my social circle he seemed to like slim women but with hindsight I
at 7 stone 7 I had no curves at all

OP posts:
Mammyofasuperbaby · 26/08/2021 08:55

I'm 4ft 11 and my weight should be between 8 or 9 stone. You sound very underweight.
However there's a few issues here.

  1. How do you view your body generally (do you have severe body issues)
  2. It sounds like your partner loves you for who you are and not just your body, that's a great thing.
  3. Why do you think that being skinny attracted your partner?

Pregnancy is a strange time for our bodies and yes you will put on weight (around 35lbs, if I remember correctly) but it is needed for the health of you and your baby.

Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 08:55

CloseYourEyes with hindsight I did think 7 at 7 is too light for me although I’m within normal BMI at that weight

OP posts:
girlmom21 · 26/08/2021 08:56

You will put on weight - 100% - and it's completely normal to worry about it.

I've got a lot more stretch marks in this pregnancy than my first (next to none in my first) but any man worth anything won't be put off by the changes to a body carrying his child.

Waspsarearseholes · 26/08/2021 08:58

Oh dear. Really?

Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 08:59

Mammyofasuperbaby I’m not 7.5 stone anymore!! With hindsight that was too light a weight for me. I prefer being slim to being overweight as I was. He saw me in my weight loss ‘campaign’ and I lost several stone - around 5 stone - he seemed to pay me more attention as I got to about 8 stone

OP posts:
Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 09:01

KarmaStar don’t worry I’m not 7.5 stone any more!! in fact I’m really glad my appetite’s increased a bit after a few bad weeks of morning sickness

OP posts:
Bancha · 26/08/2021 09:03

Pregnancy will change your body and that’s really hard for lots of women, especially those with difficulties around food (it sounds like you do have an unhealthy relationship with food/your weight), if you don’t mind me saying.

You need to try to give your body permission to do what it needs to do to grow your baby and bring them into the world safely. I have so much more love and respect for my body having had a baby than I did before. It’s amazing. If your partner has a problem with your changing body (it doesn’t sound like he does, from your post) then he’s a total bellend.

Oldraver · 26/08/2021 09:04

No one needs to slim to 7.5 stone for anything

patrickbatemansbusinesscard · 26/08/2021 09:05

How long have you been together?

Bluntness100 · 26/08/2021 09:08

@patrickbatemansbusinesscard

How long have you been together?
This.
Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 09:09

patrickbateman we’ve known each other and socialised for 11 years or so as part of same broad social group but been together officially just coming up to a year

OP posts:
Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 09:11

His problem has always been the need to put on weight!!

OP posts:
bridgetreilly · 26/08/2021 09:24

Everything about this is a red flag, OP.

Original poster
LBirch02 · 26/08/2021 09:30

bridgetreilly I’m really happy and getting to a stage where I’m feeling better and enjoying my pregnancy. You can’t say that not even a few women worry a bit at the start about weight gain in pregnancy? I’m liking my new figure at the moment.

OP posts:
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