DS says DH hogs the T.V

[tastylikemustard]

DS 21 has told me his is a bit annoyed with DH as he hogs the TV, DH is planning in retiring in a couple of years and is currently reducing his hours at work which means he's at home more than he used to be. DH when he's home often watches the T.V, he has some annoying habits too, speaking on the phone to one of his mates whilst he's still watching T.V. DH occasionally comments how much DS stays in his bedroom in a jokey kind of way, DS however has said its because what most things DH wants to watch on T.V is the complete opposite as to what he wants to watch. DS has a computer in his bedroom which he can watch Netflix, ITV Hub things like that on. AIBU in telling DH to not hog the T.V as much?

@MadameMinimes

From your update your DH sounds like a nightmare. It sounds like he is just generally completely inconsiderate of anyone else. Where do you fit in all this? Is your son also frustrated by you being sidelined by your DH too?

Agree. Sorry OP but your husband sounds like an arrogant fool.

@Boatonthehorizon

This is why I never again will live with a man. They think theyre god. Most of my friends have to watch crime dramas all the time because its all their men will watch 🤮

Well, they don't have to watch crime dramas, do they?

They're choosing to. And many women enjoy crime drama

Totally agree with @Clymene that this thread is like an 80s throwback.

My children have moved out now, but the tv in the sitting room was my husband and mine really. Sometimes we’d watch things together, once a week maybe but the rest of the time they used their laptops or tablets.

The shower thing is weird. Your son should just have a shower when he wants one. It only takes about five minutes.

I don’t know why but I’m imagining your husband on a phone with a curly cable, watching Bullseye, while talking to Bernard about his Ford Cortina

He's 21 why can't he buy his own bloody TV but then again you sound like you are babying him by even starting a thread about this so I suppose I'm not too surprised

I tend to think that parents should have first dibs on the TV over their children, even if the child is an adult. These days, I actually prefer watching things on my computer, sometimes, and it's not really a hardship.

However, it's rude for your husband to make comments about your son staying in his room, if he's "hogging" the TV. And the talking over the TV would drive me nuts, too!

Asking your adult child to run a bath for you seems very strange to me. I'd tell DH to stop doing that, run his own bath, and then go ahead and use it! Otherwise, institute a rule that if someone runs a bath or has one run for them and doesn't start using it within half an hour or so, it's fair game to be unplugged. Wasteful, but better than "reserving" the bath all day when someone else needs it.

This is such an odd thread.

I was really surprised when you said they were father and son.

Anyone hogging the TV is a bit of a pita. Compromise is a good thing.

The phonecall thing is inconsiderate.

The bath thing is so weird- what middle aged man asks his 21yo son to run him a bath!?! That's just pure bonkers.

I would go mental if anyone in my house thought it was okay to sit in the living room talking on the phone over the TV. How fucking rude. The bath thing is also totally obnoxious, I couldn’t stand your husband.

I've had sons this age living at home . They've all watched TV in their rooms . Maybe once in a while will watch some sport with dad but that's all . Can't expect a lad of that age to watch TV with his mum and dad end of ! I don't think the chatter on the would phone would bother me as much as everyone else I'd go in a different room though while he was chatting. The bath thing is a bit annoying but not major. Just have a quick shower then run the bath ? I think it's nice that he has a nice chat with his mates . I watch different stuff from my DH like This is us , normal people, motherland when he is in the bath . Then shows we both like when we're together like Bosch , the undoing . A think a bit of give and take is required but if they are the only problems you're not doing so bad .

This is like a thread from the 1980s
Totally agree with @Clymene that this thread is like an 80s throwback.

Er.... I lived at home, as an adult, with my parents for some of the 80s... I don't recognise any of this odd behaviour.
Why do you think people behaved this oddly in the 80s ?

@Boatonthehorizon

This is why I never again will live with a man. They think theyre god. Most of my friends have to watch crime dramas all the time because its all their men will watch 🤮

Wow. Just where to start ?

No, no-one has to watch something they don't want on TV.
No-one has to watch the same TV as anyone else in their house
No-one has to stay with another adult who thinks they are "in charge" of the other adult.

You might have had a bad experience with one particular man, but to imagine half the world's adult population are the same, only shows your ignorance.

This is why we don't have aTV. My DD and I never like the same things so we just watch what we like on our laptops, either in separate rooms or side by side on the sofa with earphones in if we fancy the company.
Saying that, growing up, dad definitely had custody of the remote. If he was asleep in the chair and you dared to change channel he would instantly come to and say 'I was watching that!.' I thought that was a recognised 'dad' thing.
The bath thing unfortunately also reminds me of my dad, except that it was my poor mum who was the bath runner. I hoped the days of men acting as king of the house were gone but sadly it doesn't sound like it in this case.

I remember when we were younger, my dad would walk into the living room and we would get up and walk out because we knew he would take over the TV.

This was before Netflix, laptops etc., so we would just go and sit in our room.

It was rather miserable actually.

@FrankButchersDickieBow

I remember when we were younger, my dad would walk into the living room and we would get up and walk out because we knew he would take over the TV.

This was before Netflix, laptops etc., so we would just go and sit in our room.

It was rather miserable actually.

Same in my house - it was pretty grim, really.

A TV in a shared living space should be for everyone to watch equally. If parents want to watch something specific, they can put a TV in their bedroom, surely?

I remember this too . . . as soon as my father came home from work, the living room became his space. I hated being in there with him.

Basically, it sounds to me like your DH is doing everything except cocking his leg and pissing up a wall to mark his territory!

This.

And I agree with others that this sounds like my dad in the 70s and 80s, dominating the TV and taking over the whole house. I thought times had moved on.

Basically, it sounds to me like your DH is doing everything except cocking his leg and pissing up a wall to mark his territory

And the young male wants to challenge the supremacy of the silverback.

Meanwhile, the female is off hunting and gathering and is expected to adjudicate their pissing contest when she gets home.

Honestly, leave them to it.

Saying that, growing up, dad definitely had custody of the remote. If he was asleep in the chair and you dared to change channel he would instantly come to and say 'I was watching that!

Mine too! He would also then wake up later and switch the bloody TV off because HE was going to bed. Nevermind if anyone else was mid watch of something.

Why doesn't your son have a tv in his bedroom to watch? At that age I don't think I ever watched tv with a parent.

This

The thought of a bath of water going cold because someone is chatting on the phone (landline?) and that water then being wasted...