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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think he's nasty?

90 replies

RainbowBriteUk · 23/08/2021 17:37

I've recently been getting close to an ex. Had a few dates and everything was going well.

We've been texting and I called him an old affectionate nickname that he once said he loved when I called him it. When I used the term of affection (it's nothing romantic or lovey dovey) he text back saying 'please don't start all that shit again'. I was a bit taken aback by his reaction to be honest. AIBU and being overly sensitive?

OP posts:
Original poster
RainbowBriteUk · 23/08/2021 20:46

I called him out on it and he didn't text me back. Oh well. I'm done doing the running now.

OP posts:
Original poster
RainbowBriteUk · 23/08/2021 20:49

@RedHelenB It doesn't work for me at all. I think he likes to play with my emotions because I react so easily.

OP posts:
FinallyHere · 23/08/2021 20:59

we ... get on great. Every now and then he says some horrible stuff.

If you know that he is like that, do you really want to continue knowing that at any moment the other side of him will appear?

Might you start tiptoeing around him to avoid Mr Nasty. That's no way to live. He doesn't want to put up with "your shut".

Why do you put up with his shit?

LadyJaye · 23/08/2021 21:55

Oh, I've just recognised your user name.

Is this the same ex who has to be at home for his dinner cooked by his dad at 7pm every night?

ShouldersBackChestOutChinUp · 23/08/2021 21:58

This is a red flag. He's nasty, rude and abrupt. It won't get better.

Block him. Disappear. Find someone new. Seriously. If you continue to be involved with this man you'll make an utter fool of yourself.

He's shown you who he still is. Don't be a sucker. Walk away.

wintercoffees · 23/08/2021 22:04

How long ago did he become your ex

RickJames · 23/08/2021 22:05

@LadyJaye

Oh no! Not 'my dad has cooked me fish fingers and I must go home' thread Grin

Good lord, there's like 3 billion men in the world. Get the fuck away from this one lol. Seriously, try going out with a Hells Angel, a flat-earther, a stamp collector.. anything but this one!

LadyJaye · 23/08/2021 22:09

@RickJames I suspect they may be one and the same.

Branleuse · 23/08/2021 22:12

Bin him.

JaquelineBean · 23/08/2021 22:18

Narcissism jumping out at me through all those examples. Get rid, he won’t change.

Cirin · 23/08/2021 22:19

Stop trailing after an ex who clearly doesn't like you and is just using you?

HonoreDeBallsack · 23/08/2021 22:20

@RainbowBriteUk

We broke up because he said negative things about me and my weight and when I confronted him he said he didn't realise he was saying them in a derogatory fashion.
Oh, he can bog off.

How many men are there in the universe? Why waste time on this one?

CaMePlaitPas · 23/08/2021 22:39

Is this the 43 year old who likes to eat dinner with his Dad OP? Or is this the one who asked why you shaved your eyebrows?

LadyJaye · 23/08/2021 23:10

@RainbowBriteUk, you've posted many, many threads about your unfortunate dating history and many, MANY MNers have given you some genuinely compassionate and excellent advice.

Why don't you take some of it on board?

toocold54 · 23/08/2021 23:50

The only reason I can think is that he doesn’t want a relationship and is thinking you are wanting more than a friendship even though he’s made it clear that he doesn’t.

In some ways it’s good this has happened as if he is stringing you along or there’s been crossed worries at least you will know.

timeisnotaline · 23/08/2021 23:53

He’s not just after a shag he needs it to come with no lovey dovey shit and him getting to rip into you whenever he feels like it. Back into the ex for a good reason bucket.

Original poster
RainbowBriteUk · 24/08/2021 07:47

I've kicked him to the curb.

He's not the same as the one who had to go home for his tea.

I finished with the ex in this thread not long before I got with the tea man. I don't do well with men.

OP posts:
MistyGreenAndBlue · 24/08/2021 08:18

@RainbowBriteUk

I've kicked him to the curb.

He's not the same as the one who had to go home for his tea.

I finished with the ex in this thread not long before I got with the tea man. I don't do well with men.

Oh love, it's not you. We've all had a pile of shit ones - bastards are everywhere. As long as you get rid when they start being arseholes you'll do fine. Keep your standards up and one day a decent one will pass the test. Grin
Original poster
RainbowBriteUk · 24/08/2021 09:36

@MistyGreenAndBlue I really hope so. I want someone who respects me. That's all! I'm starting to feel that all men are arseholes by now!

OP posts:
MistyGreenAndBlue · 24/08/2021 09:51

[quote RainbowBriteUk]@MistyGreenAndBlue I really hope so. I want someone who respects me. That's all! I'm starting to feel that all men are arseholes by now![/quote]
Not all, just far too many. Wink
The best way to sort through the dross is to respect yourself. Don't take any crap.
It can be disheartening I know, but always remember what you deserve.
WineFlowers

KarmaStar · 24/08/2021 10:23

Are to very young op?
Or a journalist?😀

Sceptre86 · 24/08/2021 10:39

You maybe need to focus on yourself for a bit before moving from one relationship to the next. Not all men are arseholes but there seems to be a pattern in the type you go for so maybe you need to address that and what a healthy relationship looks like. As for the ex I agree with other posters he is an ex for a reason and I would leave it at that. He clearly didn't like the pet name you used when you were in a relationship and doesn't respect you.

Shoxfordian · 24/08/2021 10:44

Don’t waste any more of your time with him

FinallyHere · 24/08/2021 11:40

Good choice @RainbowBriteUk

toocold54 · 24/08/2021 11:57

They say men are like roses, you have to watch out for the pricks.
There are decent men out there you’ve just met a couple of idiots but don’t let that put you off.
Just make sure you don’t get back with any ex’s. If it didn’t work the first time it won’t work the next time.