To think I’m behind in life at 24

[ston]

Just come out of a long term relationship (5 years). Re-evaluating my whole life. Graduated from uni in 2019, wanted to take a year out to travel but didn’t happen due to covid, tried to apply for some jobs in London but didn’t have the self confidence to go to some assessment centres etc. Tried really hard to get a job in my hometown working from home.

Now I realise how miserable I am. I am working from home and going in the office once a week (1 hour and a half away). There is hardly anyone my age. I live with my parents but do go out at the weekends with some friends.

I feel I have made the wrong decision not going to London. It is ironic as my ex said the distance was a problem (he works in London). Now I am miserable about my life at home, and want a change and to get out of my hometown where I never thought I’d be forever.

Problem is I know hardly no one in London, so I’m so conflicted. To get a grad job in London now at nearly 25 years old? I feel I have messed up the last few years of life.

Go to london. You’re 24, you have the rest of your life to play it safe.

Honestly just put yourself out there! Apply for jobs, go to the assessment centres - even if you don't get the job on the first try, it's more experience for the next time!

I've moved all over the country for uni and various studies, not knowing people & while it can be daunting at first you're sure to make some friends.

At 25 you're still young & have achieved a lot so far so put your best foot forward and carry on!

It's never too late to do all the things you've listed. Go for it!

Honestly, OP, but at 24 you're still a 'baby'-adult so to speak. Your prefrontal cortex is still developing. Dont base your life decisions on unrealistic sitcoms and social media influencers. Hardly anyone has their life figured out at 24.

Life isn't a race op. At 24 I just started out in London. I couldn't have done it any sooner as I'd had a mental health crisis. Everything was fine and at 31 I'm doing great now. 24 is very young.

Oh gosh you can easy go for grad scheme at your age, lots do. On mine the ages ranged from new grads who were 22 through to a couple of people who were 27/28.

I moved to London for work when I was 26, you're definitely not too late! I had a great time (and still love living here over a decade later, albeit married and further out these days). You can do it!

I worry as I don’t really know many people in London. I don’t want to be miserable not knowing anyone!

Gosh you’ve not messed up at all. You are young. You have the perfect answer to why didn’t you apply after Uni - covid. Apply for graduate jobs. You’ve got a degree and experience. Move into a house share. Is your chosen career London centric? If not look at grad schemes in any major cities.

I moved to London (from the north west) when I was age 25, which was many years ago. I didn’t know anyone before I moved. Best thing I ever did, for career and otherwise. Go for it.

You’ll soon meet people. Job/gym/hobbies/online dating.

Go for it, 24 is the perfect time to try London for a bit!

Go for it! If you were 55 I might agree you'd got behind a bit, but 25?! Nah. It's all ahead of you still.

@ston

I worry as I don’t really know many people in London. I don’t want to be miserable not knowing anyone!

I knew no one in UK. I am still alive. You will manage 😁

So just... take a job in London? There's literally nothing holding you back. Grad cohorts range in age from 21 into the 30s.

Get a houseshare and take a grad job and you will have two built-in venues for socialising and making friends. And if you are miserable... you can move somewhere else. You seem to have got yourself in knots and stuck in a rut overthinking everything. Nothing is irrevocable. If you move and don't like it, you can try something else.

You’re so young and tbh you haven’t made any bad decisions. You’ve made decisions that you’re not happy and that’s ok! You can change things if you aren’t happy.

If it helps, I didn’t get my career started til I was 26.

Not many decisions are permanent, you can always change your mind. And if you do don’t beat yourself up, just learn from it. If you want to move to London give it a crack, if you don’t like it then Plan B.

I reckon 20s is for trying things to see what you like. Don’t put yourself under pressure.

@ston

I worry as I don’t really know many people in London. I don’t want to be miserable not knowing anyone!

It is a bit intimidating and London can feel lonely at times. But have a plan. If you have hobbies search out clubs/teams/groups you can going.

@ston

I worry as I don’t really know many people in London. I don’t want to be miserable not knowing anyone!

You stated that you are miserable now. Plus, in college you'll get to meet so many people to hang out with.

You’re right - I have got myself in a mess.

I feel behind in my life that I didn’t get a graduate job straight out of uni like basically everyone I know.

@ston

You’re right - I have got myself in a mess.

I feel behind in my life that I didn’t get a graduate job straight out of uni like basically everyone I know.

I disagree. Everyone is going through life in different paces.

Also, I know many grads and most did nlt get a grad job straight after uni because there is just not as many as grads. They got jobs.

Grad job isn't some holy grail in many cases.

I feel behind in my life that I didn’t get a graduate job straight out of uni like basically everyone I know

I used to manage grad programs, and my biggest successes were always people who'd had other FT jobs and hadn't come straight out of uni, because they'd already navigated the roughest bit of their learning curve and snapped up every available opportunity.

Just do it. Life does not come in one preset acceptable order. In ten years' time you're going to find it hilarious how much time you spent obsessing over not being "ahead" at the tender age of 24!

It sounds like you have nothing to lose! You’re not happy now so why not go for it? It could be the change that does make you happy. Covid will have derailed lots of people’s “plans” so stop comparing yourself to others. Trust that you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be and will make the right choice

I’m sorry you’re feeling like this. Life isn’t a race, and we aren’t all on the same track xx

If you get a job you really want now, you'll not notice the difference in a few years time.

You have nothing to lose by going to assessment centres or interviews - you can't get a job you don't apply for or go to the interview for! Remember you need to make sure you like the company as well as the other way round.

You are so young, definitely not to old to go to London. Do it!