What were your family struggles growing up?

[MeiganMcSeinna6]

father leaving when i was younger.

Mum and dad split when I was young after years of him abusing her.
Dad moved abroad and we never heard from him again.
We struggled for money for a long time, mum worked 3 jobs so we spent a lot of time with grandparents.
She did what she had to do to raise two children by herself though and she's my complete inspiration for that.

My eldest brother was a heroin addict, would kick off screaming punch holes in the walls, would cause arguments between my mum and dad. He gave me a black eye when I was 14 years old was a difficult time trying to do gcses. My parents were overly strict due to his actions. My dm ended up having a heart attack. It was a difficult time and awful atmosphere to live in.

Bananarama21 I can really relate to what you are saying about the atmosphere being awful to live in. I moved out as soon as I could and the relief was immense and while I struggled for money the stress was nothing compared to my home life and walking into the house feeling dread, anxious about it all kicking off, always on eggshells. I live in a very happy home now and sometimes it feels to good to truly be my life now.

Opal93 it's awful isn't it, he was on drugs on and off from the age of 17. I was about 9/10 when it first started. I was so quiet and unconfident at school because of the home environment. I can't imagine my own dc going through what I went through. I don't think my dbro who's been clean for 17 years realises the impact in had on my childhood.

A mother who was 19 having me & v I'll suited to being a mother. My parents were married & stayed together so she wsas b t a single mum. She was impatient & v short tempered. She hit me a lot for v minor things. I reckon she took her frustrations out on me. It was a running joke amongst aunts & uncles how quick tempered she was ..They used to laugh about it but it was never funny to me as I was the one being hit .
Coupled with this she was highly anxious & allowed her anxiety to ruin an awful lot of things - holidays / Christmas etc

My dad was a workaholic who tipped into being an alcoholic later in his life. I reckon he was avoiding her a lot & he stayed away a lot, gone fron early morning till late at night. They fought a lot.

It was often a v unhappy house. I often wished they'd just be done with it & split up. Money was often v tight.

My home life now is the polar opposite & our dc have grown up in totally different type of environment..thank God. I'm v often grateful for that

Being parented by two children and not really having a childhood as I was expected to take over parenting of my younger sister whilst being neglected and emotionally abused by my parents, mostly my mother.

On the upside they were the blueprint for how NOT to parent my own child so I got into therapy, cleared out the consequent dross in my life ('friends', family and ex husband)and couldn't be happier or more secure now.

The buck stopped here and I am hoping the next generation don't make such a mess of their and their children's lives.

Parents split up when I was a baby. They then spent 18 years trying to co-parent me without ever speaking to each other. So two households with two completely separate sets of rules. I felt like I had a split personality trying to please both parents. Instead of dealing with each other, I would be the one that would get in trouble if one parent LET ME do something that the other one wouldn’t. How either of them thought that the blame should lie with the child is beyond me. Was constantly anxious and on edge but no one seemed to notice.
I have a great relationship with both parents now but I don’t think I can ever forgive them in my heart for their fucked up parenting.

My mother must have had anxiety or depression or OCD but nothing was diagnosed. She was emotionally absent, gaslighting and abusive and would have a meltdown around twice a week which were violent and scary. Both mum and dad had alcohol problems and we were in poverty. My mother was so focussed on her completing her qualifications and she blames us children as the reason she was not successful in her chosen career path. She screamed at me often: " I should have aborted you, I didn't want you" and "if you don't like it, fck off out of my house".

One example was my mother had a violent meltdown when I was 11. This was a few weeks before I was due to start secondary school. As revenge for some perceived slight, she threw away all my newly-bought uniform and taunted me that I would have to start secondary school with no uniform. I was so terrified I didn't know what would happen, and I started to plan my suicide. A few days before I started secondary school, she returned the uniform to me, which she had hidden in a black bag. My dad and nan were also 'in' on this lie. I find this incomprehensible, now I'm a mum to a nearly 11 year old girl. I always attempt to be a totally different mother to my daughter.

From 13 I was desperate to escape and put everything into my education so I could escape for university aged 18. Which I did...