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AIBU?

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Original poster

Bad weather only really matters when you have children

232 replies

Welcometotheterrorzone · 21/08/2021 21:07

This might be a bit of a 'well duh' thread but...
Since when did so much of my happiness depend on the weather?
Child free friends still seem to have amazing weekends and holidays despite it pissing down all week. 'Let's just go to the pub or musuem or stay in and watch interesting box sets' all of which are denied to parents of small children.
Now my life seems to revolve around 'please don't rain' 'did I just feel a spot' and 'we've paid £1,700 for this cottage and we are going to the beach, kids, get your waterproof trousers on!'
I mean, I chose this life, but I never expected to have to spend half my life in a car 'waiting for it to ease up a little?'

OP posts:
whatswithtodaytoday · 21/08/2021 22:17

My most viewed app is Minutecast on AccuWeather. It tells you the minute it's meant to start /stop raining and is pretty accurate. Bloody love it.

I can and do take my two year old out in the rain, but after a bit of puddle jumping he gets hot/cold, tries to take his coat or wellies off, wants to go on the wet, dangerously slippy playground, or sits down in a puddle and gets soaked through and cries. None of which are fun for either of us.

Pub lunch - only if it's served quickly and I have a steady stream of snacks to give him. Museum - sure, but he'll run round it in 10 minutes and I won't get to see anything. They're not really aimed at two year olds. Movie - errrr no. He gets bored halfway through Waffle Dog.

I love being outdoors, he loves being outdoors, his first demand every garden is 'my garden'. But endless rain with a toddler is just soul-destroying.

Excelthetube · 21/08/2021 22:18

What is it with parents when they think their lives are Sssoooooo much harder than anyone childless/childfree.
Yet most can be so horrible to those people too.

Martyrdom at the extreme

Hardbackwriter · 21/08/2021 22:21

@Excelthetube

What is it with parents when they think their lives are Sssoooooo much harder than anyone childless/childfree. Yet most can be so horrible to those people too.

Martyrdom at the extreme

Are you not a parent? Surely you're not delivering lectures on good parenting if not?!
Original poster
Welcometotheterrorzone · 21/08/2021 22:22

@Excelthetube oh come on you know that's not what I mean. It's just if I compare your average family U.K. holiday in the rain to a young childfree couples holiday in the rain, I bet the couple has more fun. My cousin just got back from a very wet honeymoon and had a great time (shag, pub, food, nap, pub, bit of culture, booze, sleep) whilst for most of my parent friends it's more of an endurance test. ESPECIALLY if you're camping!

OP posts:
SpiderinaWingMirror · 21/08/2021 22:23

I have a film somewhere of me with my sister in law, brother in law, nieces and nephews and my own very small children on holiday in Wales, possibly Easter 2000.
It is literally blowing a gale and raining. The film shows us trudging up and down a beach. Sitting in a people carrier and a vw golf parked next to each other passing a picnic around without it being blown out of tupperware and finally singing.
I remember showing this to my brothers californian wife and ending up hysterical at her complete lack of comprehension.
To think, at the time I was telling myself I was "making memories" only to have no recollection of it, its a good job we filmed it.

MazDazzle · 21/08/2021 22:27

We’ve been camping all weekend in the rain.

The biggest problem is that my children won’t STFU, so anywhere I take them they are LOUD! If I had a pound for every time I said ‘indoor voice!’…

Having a lazy day doesn’t go hand in hand with kids - lazing on the sofa watching movies isn’t the same with a chatterbox poking you in the eye ball every time you nod off!

Claudia84 · 21/08/2021 22:27

You can’t actually be comparing a honeymoon to camping?

WiggIyWoo · 21/08/2021 22:31

@LionGiraffe

I have a 1 year old.

Spent the day walking with friends followed by a pub meal while DP looked after DD.

This evening DP is at a restaurant with friends while I look after DD.

It’s been a good weekend (so far).

Come back when you have a 2.5 year old. We used to do exactly the same with our 1 year old and it was bliss. When they start getting really quite heavy for the back carrier and too big to sit in a pub high chair, it's less fun.
Polkabott · 21/08/2021 22:36

No, I used to hate the rain and bad weather when on holiday prior to having DS, weirdly every hen weekend I went on it poured with rain, annoying after you've spent ages getting ready! I don't mind the rain now, DS is pretty happy with puddles still, and not overly fussed if we stay indoors for a day or whatever.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 21/08/2021 22:36

My kids literally dont give a shit about the weather. Small 'un actively loves a wet day, will happily lark about in puddles for hours, and appreciates the high speed potential of a puddle suit on a wet slide. Big one likes a wet beach because he prefers wet sand for building castles!

There's a mindset you have to get into, that you just chuck on the warm gear/waterproofs etc and find the activities that work well on a wet day!

EffYouSeeKaye · 21/08/2021 22:37

@Excelthetube

What is it with parents when they think their lives are Sssoooooo much harder than anyone childless/childfree. Yet most can be so horrible to those people too.

Martyrdom at the extreme

It’s just that parents have had both lives. The one without children and the one with. So when they say it’s harder with children than it was without, then that is true for them and their experience.
NewMum0305 · 21/08/2021 22:39

Rolling my eyes at people making suggestions for activities that take up about 30 mins at best!

My daughter loves baking, drawing etc but it’s pretty tough to fill a 12 hour day with those activities! And as for a movie day for pre-schoolers - is the plan to have 8 or so back-to-back films??

Excelthetube · 21/08/2021 22:40

@EffYouSeeKaye
That’s one persons life. A pretty privileged one too. I’m sure that the woman who works night shifts on minimum wage in a care home that I know doesn’t have long endless days in bed luxuriating without the thought of children.

Original poster
Welcometotheterrorzone · 21/08/2021 22:43

@Excelthetube I work for pretty much minimum wage in a hospital which is why I fucking resent it raining every single day of the holiday that I am paying the majority of a monthly salary to be on! If I didn't have school aged children I could go away in balmy September or beautiful June but no!

OP posts:
Planetsandstars · 21/08/2021 22:45

But have you bought a puddle suit and adjusted your mindset, @Welcometotheterrorzone Wink

MadameOvary81 · 21/08/2021 22:45

Absolutely. I have just bought myself a rain jacket for the first time in my adult life and it's the most ugly motherfucking thing i've ever clapped eyes on. I'm now desperately trying to find a pair of sexy wellies to go with it, in a desperate attempt to not feel like Jeremy Clarkson. I swore blind i'd never wear either...but here I am, Worzel Gummidge mark II.

Original poster
Welcometotheterrorzone · 21/08/2021 22:48

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland find the activities that work well on a wet day except everything that needs to be booked in advance, is shut or is busy. Today I've tried swimming (fully booked till Thursday) musuem (fully booked apart from half hour slot at 4.30 when they shut at 5, soft play (would be absolute hell but one is booked for a party and the other is fully booked, science musuem is £20 per person and took half hour last time we attempted it. So no I do not think it's mindset, it's Covid, atrocious weather even for the U.K. and everyone being forced to holiday in the same two bits of the U.K. which are nice!

OP posts:
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 21/08/2021 22:49

I know exactly what you mean OP.

Without children, if it’s raining you can find a pub, settle in, and take your time over food, have a few cosy drinks by the fire etc. With kids, especially little ones, they’ll be restless after a fairly short while. Then what?

Or you can stay in your holiday place and snuggle up without anyone being booooored…

I mean, I’m on holiday with kids right now in Wales - it’s been raining a lot but we’re still having an amazing time. Today we went walking on an uninhabited island which was fantastic- ot was raining heavily to begin with, but it eased off an was fantastic. My kids are 7 and 12 though.

But I still know exactly what you mean!

EffYouSeeKaye · 21/08/2021 22:51

[quote Excelthetube]@EffYouSeeKaye
That’s one persons life. A pretty privileged one too. I’m sure that the woman who works night shifts on minimum wage in a care home that I know doesn’t have long endless days in bed luxuriating without the thought of children.[/quote]
No, but they are just saying their life is harder than it was before they had children. Not that it is harder than anyone’s life. Whatever their starting point was - working nights & struggling to make ends meet, or living off somebody else’s platinum card - they are still doing that plus caring for a child, for example.

People are usually just describing their experiences, not making a competition out of it.

It’s like when teachers moan about their jobs and get shot down by other professionals taking offence and saying their jobs are just as hard, when no comparison was intended.

PixieLaLa · 21/08/2021 22:54

Ergh could you sound anymore resentful? It was your choice to have children, maybe you should spend more time focusing on all the good parts of having a family rather than comparing yourself to childless couples. Confused

BastardMonkfish · 21/08/2021 22:55

@DGFB

Oh come on, we’re on holiday too. I don’t want to spend it doing arts and crafts all day with the rain beating down

Or baking with children, baking with children is terrible! They make such a mess, try to injure themselves constantly and then refuse to eat what you've baked.

thriftyhen · 21/08/2021 22:55

No! Bad weather only really matters when you have dogs and horses!

TrainspottingWelsh · 21/08/2021 22:55

@EffYouSeeKaye no, parents have had their own life experience, they haven't had everybody else's life experiences. If you struggle with something as a parent when you didn't pre dc, it doesn't automatically mean it is harder for parents in general than someone without dc.
Horses are genuinely harder work in the rain than in dry weather, but I think we'd all agree that anyone stating 'bad weather is harder for horse owners than the unhorsey' would live in an extremely sheltered bubble. We wouldn't defend it by suggesting horse owners have a wider life experience than none horse owners so are entitled to decide everyone else has it easier.

FunnysInLaJardin · 21/08/2021 22:57

@PlanDeRaccordement

I disagree. Whenever it rained on holiday in a cottage we would have a day in with Arts and crafts Board games Children’s films Reading stories Baking

As well as going out in rain itself.
You are only limited by your imagination.

I assume you had DC who would be happy with that?

Long ago now but my 2 boys need to be active all the fucking time, board games, baking and arts and craft did NOT cut it

The only limits are your particular breed of DC

smashionaltreasure · 21/08/2021 22:59

I say this with all sincerity-

The deficit lies not in the weather but in your wardrobe.

Don thee a puddlebuster.

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