To feel cheated

[Planetsandstars]

Pregnancy spent in lockdown, no partners at scans, no newborn photo shoot, not even a proper send off at work.

Newborn in lockdown.

Then as soon as we can do things again the weather is beyond shit, I wanted a summer …

and if the restrictions are eased, why aren’t they? Why are some places still blaming covid for crap service?

So you are never allowed to have a bad day or bad experience because there are people elsewhere who don’t have clean water to drink?

Nobodies saying that just saying that crying over a send off at work and photo shoots is nothing compared to people loosing loved ones and their children to this illness. She wanted a baby, she got a baby and her baby is fine and healthy.. that's the point of having a baby not all this material bullshit on top. She litteratly has nothing to complain about but wants a pity party.

@SoupDragon

So you are never allowed to have a bad day or bad experience because there are people elsewhere who don’t have clean water to drink?

I think it's somewhat distasteful when there will be people actually on here who have lost loved ones and livelihoods due to this pandemic.

You could say that about so many threads here. We have threads of women fleeing domestic abuse and others worrying about whether their cleaner spends too long cleaning the toilet.

Everything could be insensitive, triggering, entitled to someone else if they live a different way.

This lady didn't get the pregnancy she'd hoped for. Presumably it was her first baby.

I had a miscarriage and was made redundant within a week of each other last year. That doesn't take away from her missing out on opportunities - it doesn't make her experience any easier.

Check your privilege love.
I also spent my entire maternity leave in lock down and yes it sucked. But I also had 2 family members die due to Covid and a load of other stuff I won’t bore you with. Sometimes you just need to be grateful for things you have instead of focusing on what you don’t have.

Your problems are small and minor compared to many who have losed their lives loved ones , businesses. You need to get a grip what a self indulgent post like your the hardest done by. You had a baby not the messiah people died treatments stopped.

It's all in the title. If it'd been 'am I unreasonable for feeling disappointed', the responses would have been different. To feel cheated though? No definitely not.

bloodywhitecat I'm sorry that you missed out of more time with your dh and his treatment was affected it was incompletely unfair.

You're so lucky to have a baby. Just look at the fertility board. Just focus on that.

Sorry I can't get past 'new born photo shoot' and 'proper send off from work'

You do know that people have died? Lives, business destroyed?
But yeh, sorry you didn't get a 'professional' soft focus photo of your baby and balloons on your desk

I'm sorry the year has been crap for you PaS. I've felt genuinely miserable too, about very little, I think we all have. I'm thinking that we all fantasise about how lovely certain times in our life are going to be, getting married or having our first baby are big life events and if our expectations are not met we do feel let down and hurt. I was raging last Christmas because my youngest son could not come home.
Of course there is always someone (a lot ) worse off than you. Somehow it doesn't make coping with our own problems or unhappiness any easier thinking about them. Here's hoping that the next year will be happier for you - and for all of us!

@bloodywhitecat I can see why you feel cheated.
I suffered in lockdown with stress homeschooling, working and studying, but this has ended, I can see you have real and on going pain

OP, take photos now and move on.

@pinkcircustop

Everyone has been “cheated” out of something during this pandemic from students to the elderly to kids.

It’s not just parents, and yes I understand as I also had a baby in lockdown.

This. I'm missing out on spending valuable time with my sister who has inoperable cancer. We had lots of trips and activities planned.

When people complain about having babies during Covid it really grinds my gears.

I can't even complain about my gripes because I know people whose parents died during Covid and they couldn't be there for them in hospital or give them the funeral they wanted etc.

There really are bigger problems out there!

I hate these threads- can’t you just be happy that you had a pregnancy that went smoothly (as in no exemption for partner to attend scans for support etc) and a healthy happy baby (since your biggest complaint seems to be about ‘crap service’?

No newborn photo shoot 😂

@vivainsomnia

It's all in the title. If it'd been 'am I unreasonable for feeling disappointed', the responses would have been different. To feel cheated though? No definitely not.

I agree.

Seriously, when life really throws something bad at you, you will realise how ridiculous you are being.

YABU

I suggest you ask for this thread to be deleted.

Never complain about a stubbed toe to someone with no feet.

If she's seen all her friends and family have one type of maternity leave and she had it imagined in her head then suddenly lockdown 1 happened and who knew what world she was bringing her baby into then suddenly she's having a completely different experience to what she imagined. I mean by lockdown 3/4 (whatever it was) then she would have known there were restrictions when she got pregnant so could adjust her expectations.

Cheated no, disappointed yes.

Think it's awful the lack of sympathy you're getting op. Yes we've all had it shit but you're also allowed to feel how you feel.
My baby was born July last year. He's our first and likely our only due to fertility issues. I live abroad and all my family but two haven't even met him yet.

Get on your raincoat and get out there regardless! Splash in puddles and try to enjoy the time now. World is going to take a bit of time before getting back to normal

@vodkaredbullgirl

1st time poster.

You must be a new poster, if you’re not familiar with name changing.

More a moan about the weather to be honest, it was freezing this morning, but it’s actually brightened up now so someone sympathised with me, even if it wasn’t on MN!

Erm yes I am, been here years and years. Should have said NC too.

And out of all the replies, you reply to mine

You could say that about so many threads here. We have threads of women fleeing domestic abuse and others worrying about whether their cleaner spends too long cleaning the toilet.

You could, but it wouldn't be even remotely the same.

Well, what’s the problem then?

At any rate, my heart goes out to those of you who have lost loved ones it is obviously awful, far more awful than my experiences. But I was hoping for a nice summer after two years of crap!

I did actually get pregnant just before the first lockdown, although I wouldn’t change it anyway as baby is gorgeous … but had no way of knowing how it would pan out!