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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Reading Festival / 16yr olds.

114 replies

houselikeashed · 18/08/2021 22:39

Would you let your 16yr DD go to Reading Festival?
IMO DD is not very 'aware' of what's happening around her.

DH says she can go, I'm saying she can't.

Just wondering what others think?

OP posts:
maddening · 19/08/2021 00:23

I would rather she went with young 16 yo friends than older friends.

I went at 16, had an excellent time.

maddening · 19/08/2021 00:28

Imo it must be safer these days with phones and stuff, in the 90's if you got pissed and lost you stayed lost.

Good tips on keeping safe from pick pocketing, keeping together in at least pairs and waiting to get in to the arena area to use the flushing loos to avoid the portaloos.

And make sure she has enough loo roll.

Has she done camping before?

KittyMcKitty · 19/08/2021 00:31

@houselikeashed

Do you think you need to be pretty streetwise to be safe?
Not really. There are dealers there but they don’t push anything- according to my older child they just walk around offering “ket and pills” so just reinforce the message that a festival is no place to experiment with drugs.

It’s a lot of year 11’s - my eldest says there’s not the harassment of girls that you get in places like Laganas.

LawnFever · 19/08/2021 07:29

@houselikeashed

Do you think you need to be pretty streetwise to be safe?
It’s full of other 16/17 year olds, there will be lots of drunk teenagers drinking cans of cider in the campsite but in the arena they do definitely take asking for ID seriously.

They might get offered drugs, as long as they’re sensible enough to say no and stick together they’ll be fine. Nobody will force anything on them.

Make sure they all have power packs to charge phones & arrange a meeting point if they lose each other (although everyone gets chucked out of the main arena after the headliners anyway so they’ll make it back to camp after)

LawnFever · 19/08/2021 07:33

Make sure they pack sensibly, and for all weathers, wet feet are miserable if it rains, sunburn is miserable if it’s hot!

Take wellies/sun cream/ear plugs/eye mask/lots of socks/warm jumper/etc

HelenHywater · 19/08/2021 07:34

my 16 yo dd is going, Both my other dds went when they were 16 (in the summer after GCSEs). I think the whole festival is full of 16 year olds (my older daughters wouldn't dream of going now - they are 18 and 20).

I have no doubt alcohol there is alcohol and drugs there.

I will just tell my dd to be careful, that she can phone me at any time. My other daughters were fine.

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 19/08/2021 07:35

Reading is considered a sort of "starter festival"

lots and lots post GCSE so lots of young ones.

Agree preparation is vital- will she be camping or is it a day ticket?

LakieLady · 19/08/2021 07:38

My DNiece went to Reading at 16. She's quite naive, but she was fine. She was in a big group and they all looked out for one another.

The ghastly toilets and lack of showers completely put her off ever going to another festival though!

ILoveFlumps · 19/08/2021 07:39

My DDs have been going since they were 15. It helps we live 5 mins from the festival site though. There were never any issues and they always had an amazing time.

KingdomScrolls · 19/08/2021 07:43

I went at 16 and for the following five or six years, first time I kissed DH was at Reading when we were sixteen 😁

Romanticrights · 19/08/2021 07:52

I went when I was 16/17, then again when I was about 22 and felt SO out of place! Definitely preferred it younger. I never felt unsafe, in fact I loved how friendly it all was! Have the best memories of Leeds fest Grin

TabithaTiger · 19/08/2021 07:55

As others have said, Reading is full of 16/17 year olds. DS is 20 and won't be going this year ad he he says it's for kids!

It's pretty full on, but I'm sure she'll be fine and have a great time if you let her go, There's loads of security/ welfare people on hand if she has any issues.

redtshirt50 · 19/08/2021 07:58

I'd definitely let her go

Me and all my friends went to reading at 16 and it was great.

Her friends will be reminiscing for years to come so she'll be sorry if she misses out.

Just make she she knows to phone you if shes in trouble, and you will come and get her whatever the issue is.

dressupinyou · 19/08/2021 08:02

I'm torn on this. I've been to both Reading and Boardmasters (the other traditional post school festival) and they worry me a bit. I wouldn't stop my kid but I'd secretly hope they'd wait another year or two.

Great festivals, well run and all that but this year especially there'll be lots of teens there who aren't very streetwise.

Lots of kids with minimal experience of drugs just taking everything offered.
Fights, being robbed, losing all their stuff.

I found Reading a bit sketchy and heard it's a much nicer atmosphere at Leeds.

They won't listen I expect but suggest when they get there, they find out where the camp stewards are and the medical and welfare tents so they know where to go to ask for help if they need it or just need a friendly ear.

Big festivals can be overwhelming the first time. Reading is ok for this as it's all in one arena but it's still big and confusing at night when you've lost your mates and can't find your tent.

JudyGemstone · 19/08/2021 08:05

I reckon I can get to Reading in 90 mins if I have to, also have family there which is helpful.

He’s used to coming camping/festivals with me and my partner who’s band is performing, so has been a bit spoilt as we have a decent set up with van, gazebo, fire pit, bbq etc
4 nights is quite a lot to be slumming it but they’ll get used to it I’m sure!

SkankingMopoke · 19/08/2021 08:05

I also went at 16. I came home with my nose pierced, but was otherwise unharmed Grin
I went with 3 other girls from school, having never camped before (staying in a friend's tent). I took only my DM's 1970s sleeping bag and a change of clothes tied in a bin bag, with no waterproofs despite the forecast of rain (I like to be optimistic 😂). I wore the bin bag most of the weekend to keep the rain off, and had a great time. The next festival I went to I added a foam roll mat, waterproofs and food to my packing, and took it all in a proper bag...

Unless she is utterly hopeless, I'd let her go. It'll be a great learning experience and a lot of fun.

fishonabicycle · 19/08/2021 08:09

My son and loads of friends went after GCSEs. All of the kids from our area camped in the same field, and had a great time!

EmmaGrundyForPM · 19/08/2021 08:14

@HelenHywater

my 16 yo dd is going, Both my other dds went when they were 16 (in the summer after GCSEs). I think the whole festival is full of 16 year olds (my older daughters wouldn't dream of going now - they are 18 and 20).

I have no doubt alcohol there is alcohol and drugs there.

I will just tell my dd to be careful, that she can phone me at any time. My other daughters were fine.

Yes, DS went after GCSEs and at end of Y12 and loved it. When he was in Y13 I asked him if he was going after A levels and he rolled his eyes and said "no way, it's full of kids" in a scathing voice.
RealBecca · 19/08/2021 08:17

Yes i would.

Im trying hard to find a gentle way to say this that wont panic you but try to make sure she looks after her drink and understands that being drunk isnt her giving consent. Pergaps a vague talk about how she plans to stay safe so the seed is planted (sorry to make this dark, full disclaimer that i am 100% projecting)

Blamelesscars · 19/08/2021 08:19

I went to Glastonbury with a. Friend when we were 14 & 15 (and every year after until we moved and stopped getting tickets via local
Scheme)

V festival from 16-19 (with friends)

Also went to Cornwall
For 6 weeks with just my best friend after our GCSEs so I would have been 15 because I’m an august baby …

Id let me son do the same when he’s old enough i expect

gogohm · 19/08/2021 08:21

Mine went at 18, was plenty of younger ones there. She said it was was very well organised and lots of security, more than the other festivals she had been to with us and also welfare tents etc because they know there is a lot of unaccompanied young people. Whether at 16 they can cope and not do anything stupid is down to the individual, they mature at different rates! Dd went with about 25 from her school

BrendaLee · 19/08/2021 08:22

My daughter went to Reading at 16 and had a fab time. However, has just come back from Boardmasters - went with cousins and friends and they all now have COVID. I’m sure it will be rife in Reading too so might be worth taking that into consideration?

MojoMoon · 19/08/2021 08:23

I went at 16. Worked in the bar at 18. And in the welfare tent at 20 (admittedly getting on for 15 years ago)

So my view from the welfare tent: the most widespread problems were teens with existing mental health problems, who by Sunday were probably very tired, dirty and low on resilience - this seemed to make arguments with their friends more common and so they'd end up by themselves in floods of tears in the welfare tent. Usually the answer was just to call their mum and get them picked up.

We had a lot more people who had had too much to drink than had problems taking drugs. We had some monitored sobering up beds.

And lots of girls with terrible blisters due to wearing stupid footwear. Tip: wear trainers and liner socks. If very wet, wellies and knee length socks underneath (people had blisters on their calf from rubbing wellies on bare skin). Bring some compeed plasters. Blisters ruin all your fun.

And boys who had managed to lose all their possessions. That was a category definitely dominated by males. I'd recommend a discreet money belt to be worn under their top. Don't leave stuff you care about in your tent. Have a meeting point discussed with friends.

Go to the welfare tent if you need help. Although we don't dole out cash to you so don't ask for money!

Yes there are a small number of more serious incidents but the vast majority have a great time

LemonRoses · 19/08/2021 08:23

No, not in a hundred years. They moaned but accepted it. Festivals are for adults over eighteen in my book.

Under eighteens only with parents. Too many risks for sixteen year olds to deal with.

dressupinyou · 19/08/2021 08:25

@Blamelesscars

I went to Glastonbury with a. Friend when we were 14 & 15 (and every year after until we moved and stopped getting tickets via local Scheme)

V festival from 16-19 (with friends)

Also went to Cornwall
For 6 weeks with just my best friend after our GCSEs so I would have been 15 because I’m an august baby …

Id let me son do the same when he’s old enough i expect

Glastonbury is very different to Reading though, it's not a fair comparison at all.