Issues with new guy

[Notanotherone89]

That’s just it. Thought I really like him and had a good few dates. Then when we’re we’re out for dinner he made some comment about eating out getting expensive ( it wasn’t an expensive place ) and he’s said before he has no money issues.
Then when sitting near him I noticed a bit of BO, sex was a disappointment and to top it off he’s decided he can’t speak to me on the phone in case my 16 year old daughter asks who it is!! I think that’s my decision who and when I speak to people. I’m feeling a bit cross at being told that. AIBU?

Nah. You can do better.

You've tried him and found he's not suitable. Throw him back.

Some of you are harsh.

So made a comment about eating out being expensive = tight
OP smelled BO once after a good few dates = smelly/disgusting
Bad sex = was this the first time? Sex often takes time to get better.

The phone thing is a bit dodgy though.

I'd love to meet one of these perfect people who never have to worry about money, never have a slight whiff and who always have perfect sex from the first time.

Why does the phone issue bother you more than the fact he’s crap in bed and smells?! Raise your standards.

So you take it in turns to pay. Did he say something about the cost when it was his turn to pay or your turn?

@Goodthings

I hope you didn’t have sex after you smelt the BO?

Pheromones!

Eek!

Eating out regularly does get expensive.

The BO and bad sex are enough of a reason not to date him.

I don't understand the phone call comment.

@girlmom21 he didn’t want my dd asking questions about who I was taking to!

@Notanotherone89 but why's that an issue?

think the BO thing is a bit harsh, too. OP caught a whiff; she didn't say he constantly stinks. I'm sure all the MN'ers too clean for dandruff will say they've never had bad breath in their life, but the fact is between 1 in 2 and 1 in 4 people have it fairly regularly. If these things are chronic, and caused by laziness and poor hygiene - yeah, gross. But if they're occasional, pipe down, ffs.

What I find most interesting is a lot of MN claim to not shower daily and claim to only shower 2/3 times a week then moan at a man for having a little bit of BO when you can guarantee they do as well but don’t notice it themselves

@girlmom21 it’s not for me! Dd is fine with me dating & wants me to meet someone nice. He’s obviously decided it’s a problem

*Some of you are harsh.

So made a comment about eating out being expensive = tight
OP smelled BO once after a good few dates = smelly/disgusting
Bad sex = was this the first time? Sex often takes time to get better.

The phone thing is a bit dodgy though.

I'd love to meet one of these perfect people who never have to worry about money, never have a slight whiff and who always have perfect sex from the first time.*

I agree. These replies about him being "tight, controlling and lazy" because he had a whiff of sweat once after several dates and made a passing comment about money WHICH IS TRUE are absurd. If this was a man posting about a woman he'd get an absolute pasting.

@namechangetheworld the money comment was strange as he’d make it quite clear before he has no money issues at all!

[quote Notanotherone89]@namechangetheworld the money comment was strange as he’d make it quite clear before he has no money issues at all![/quote]
Somebody doesn’t have to have money issues to comment that eating out all the time gets expensive, especially considering you’re not the only person he’ll want to go out for meals with sometimes. It sounds like he was making the point as a lead in to suggesting cheaper dates involving other things.

It’s really the least of your issues with him I’d focus on. All of the others are the reason you tell him you don’t feel any chemistry and move on.

Crap sex with a stinky man. What's not to love?

@Crunchymum he comes with the added bonus of guilt-tripping after meals and being secretive about phone calls too.
He's mine!

@NalPolishRemover I completely agree! Ive bet on (probably too!) many dates over the years and have never once experienced smells!!! Or any of the other issues - well apart from one tight one.

because he had a whiff of sweat

BO is very different to being a bit hot and sweaty as the one odd.

Off

@KatherineJaneway hardly just a whiff of sweat euuwwgg

[quote Notanotherone89]@KatherineJaneway hardly just a whiff of sweat euuwwgg[/quote]
Hi, A pp said that being a bit sweaty was like BO. I was saying that is not the same at all 🤮

Well he doesn’t sound great does he?! 😬