Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DS wants an eyebrow piercing!

28 replies

schunnig · 16/08/2021 19:48

DS is 15, his style has changed a lot recently, which I don't have an issue with this, but recently he's been going on about want an eyebrow piercing, apparently he can have it but needs parental consent.

He came back from his dads, and told me his dad said yes, I spoke to ex and he told me he'd said no and that he told DS he probably wouldn't be allowed it at school. DS also told ex I said yes.

I asked DS why he lied and he told me that we should let him as its what he wants and he’d be paying for it.

Are we BU by saying no?

OP posts:
Plumtree391 · 16/08/2021 19:50

You're not unreasonable at all. He's going through a phase and will get over it.

Newnormal99 · 16/08/2021 19:52

I cannot imagine it will be slowed at school. My dd has just had second ear piercing and is eyeing up her next one but she knows it has to be out at school.

I have a feeling she will opt for college at 16 rather than school 6th form to get more freedom with stuff like that!

GiantCheeseMonster · 16/08/2021 19:52

A reputable piercer won’t pierce under-16s for anything except single earlobes, even with parental consent. You are not BU and I would also be concerned about where he is planning on getting this done.

DramaAlpaca · 16/08/2021 19:52

I'm all for picking my battles with teenagers but I'd say no to that, mainly because they can scar very badly.

SummerHouse · 16/08/2021 19:53

No, not at all. I wouldn't really care about the look of it. His look is up to him ( and school...). But eyebrow piercings can get infected and / or grow out leaving a scar. He is not old enough to make that decision.

Tibtab · 16/08/2021 19:54

It’s good that you and Ex are on the same page. School are not going to allow it though even if he manages to get it done.

BeautifulBirds · 16/08/2021 20:05

You are quite right to say no. He is a child. I had my first inking at 16, with parental consent, and would change it if I could! My piercings have left scars, that I hate.

Mumdiva99 · 16/08/2021 20:09

I would let him. Its just a piercing which can heal up if he doesn't like o
It or changes his mind. I was allowed to decide at 13 I wanted my ears pierced....(yes my mum made me wait till then). Your son is 15 which is even older. I would save my 'No' for something which he might really regret later.

Hellocatshome · 16/08/2021 20:11

I would tell him he can have it done when he is 16. I would put money on him not bothering when he turns 16.

Piggypiggyoinkoink · 16/08/2021 20:36

Is he aware of the possible risks? Triggering of migraines, nerve damage (to the extent his eye could droop permanently) and infection which can spread and affect his sight for starters. Not to say this will happen, but they’re not reversible if they do.

We were presented with a safety video at work that showed what happened if a face piercing got caught and ripped out. It was not pretty. One tough as nails lad passed out at that slide.

As has been said in other messages, any reputable piercer won’t touch him at his current age, but unfortunately there are disreputable places about. And these are more likely to cause issues.

It’s great that you and your ex communicate by the way. And DS needs to learn one of life’s harsh lessons - just because you want something, doesn’t mean you’re going to get it…

Stand firm!

Original poster
schunnig · 16/08/2021 20:39

@BeautifulBirds

You are quite right to say no. He is a child. I had my first inking at 16, with parental consent, and would change it if I could! My piercings have left scars, that I hate.
DS looked it up on Google apparently!

He also seems to think his school won't have a problem with it (although I'm sure it's against the uniform policy). He had his ears pierced last year, which I was fine with. But I think he's a bit too young for an eyebrow piercing.

OP posts:
Meatshake · 16/08/2021 20:41

Tell him it can be his 16th birthday present and then you've got a while to talk him out of it?

sbhydrogen · 16/08/2021 20:42

My school didn't mind my friend having an eyebrow piercing. Let him have it, he can take it out if he wants to.

TheBodyPiercer · 16/08/2021 20:50

It's a bit of a reach saying no reputable piercer will pierce under 16s. Many reputable piercers will pierce under 16s with parental consent, which piercings they will do is a matter of personal experience etc. I personally won't pierce eyebrows under 16 regardless of consent.

Could you maybe compromise on an ear piercing? If he really wants it he'll find somewhere to do it and it wont be the type of place you want him getting pierced.

MrsSkylerWhite · 16/08/2021 20:53

I often wonder how people feel about their piercings as they age and their tastes change? Are eyebrow piercings like earlobes, do they close up if they’re not used?

My stepdad had tattoos when he was in the army, aged 17 in the 1960s. He hates them with a passion now and won’t wear short sleeves in the hottest of days.

I gues we all have to make our own mistakes but at 15 I’d say no, wait a while.

therocinante · 16/08/2021 21:04

I'd say no, only because it's such a hassle at school getting told to take it out all the time/having to wear a stupid plaster over it - I got my nose pierced at 15 and it was such a faff.

I wouldn't worry too much about scarring if he's sensible enough to look after it, I know a couple of people who had their eyebrows done and there's no scarring there now.

But it'll be a nightmare for school (and an infection risk if he's having to take it out/put it back in all the time), so tell him he's got to wait until he finishes year 11 maybe?

GiantCheeseMonster · 16/08/2021 21:05

TheBodyPiercer I’m only quoting the owner of the studio I use for my piercings who will only do earlobes on under-16s and is adamant that a reputable studio should not do anything else below this age. She is very insistent on ID etc.

therocinante · 16/08/2021 21:06

@TheBodyPiercer

It's a bit of a reach saying no reputable piercer will pierce under 16s. Many reputable piercers will pierce under 16s with parental consent, which piercings they will do is a matter of personal experience etc. I personally won't pierce eyebrows under 16 regardless of consent.

Could you maybe compromise on an ear piercing? If he really wants it he'll find somewhere to do it and it wont be the type of place you want him getting pierced.

This is a good point... if you say no and he does it anyway, he's doing to the type of piercer who'd pierce a 15 year old's face without parental consent. Which is exactly the kind of place I got my nose pierced at 15 and took a LONG time to heal!

Not advocating for letting him get it done, but if you could get him to compromise on something that's not on his face you could help choose the piercer.

TheBodyPiercer · 16/08/2021 21:11

@GiantCheeseMonster

TheBodyPiercer I’m only quoting the owner of the studio I use for my piercings who will only do earlobes on under-16s and is adamant that a reputable studio should not do anything else below this age. She is very insistent on ID etc.
Everyone has different restrictions that they adhere to. There's no legal guidelines and age restrictions vary from council to council and insurance to insurance. So it may be correct that no reputable studio near him should but it's certainly not the case country wide.

To pierce anyone under 16 I require consent from the person getting pierced, the parent/guardian as well as further proof if surnames differ.

NewlyGranny · 16/08/2021 21:15

16 isn't long to wait. I'd be more worried that at 15 he still hasn't twigged that you and his DF compare notes on what he's saying!

steppemum · 16/08/2021 21:17

Most schools have a policy that they have to take the piercing out for pe, and a piercing needs 6-8 weeks to heal.

eyebrow piercings are notorious for being slow to heal.

Some schools do not allow anythign but ears.

I would check uniform policy first.

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 16/08/2021 21:17

He can get his eyebrow peirced when he's old enough to go in and get it don't without his his mum or dad. I say that as someone who has loads of piercings and tattoos. My mum took me for ears and belly button when I was 14, but she would never have taken for anything on my face.

junebirthdaygirl · 16/08/2021 21:18

My ds got one at that age approximately and scanned around with it for the Summer holidays. He wasn't allowed to wear it in school so by September it was gone and never mentioned again. Sometimes it's not worth fighting over it as part of the plan is to shock his parents and them being not shocked ends all that pretty quickly.

AtleastitsnotMonday · 16/08/2021 21:20

Just say
‘yes, of course, they look great. In fact shall we go on Tuesday? We can both get it done together’.
That should change his mind pretty quick.

SuperCaliFragalistic · 16/08/2021 21:24

I would bollock him for trying to play you and his dad off against each other to start with. I think I would say no to the piercing. Eyebrow piercings can look pretty crap long term. I don't regret my nose piercings which I haven't worn for years but the holes are almost invisible. Eyebrows are more obvious.