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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's rude to nab a piece of a shared meal before it's served?

101 replies

00100001 · 15/08/2021 20:51

So for example. If you're having a roast and are serving it in dishes so people can take what they want. So all the hot food is being out into dishes in the kitchen, ready to take to the dining table.

Am I unreasonable in thinking that someone shouldn't pop into the kitchen/take the food through and help themselves to a bit of chicken or a roast potato before they're on the plate...? (Especially as they weren't involved in the preparation or cooking!)

OP posts:
flameycakes · 15/08/2021 21:21

My ex would always try to get a dip butty using the meat juices.

chickenwinghot · 15/08/2021 21:24

It is my biggest pet peeve OP!

HeReWeGoAgAiN1112 · 15/08/2021 21:27

It’s called “testing for poison” in our house and is completely a non event

SD1978 · 15/08/2021 21:30

Family situation, this is pretty normal,isn't it? Grabbing the best roast potato and sneaking it in.

FlowerGardens · 15/08/2021 21:31

Roasties, wedges and fries with skin on are just weird.

ShockShockShock

pinkcircustop · 15/08/2021 21:32

YABU. Why would it be rude? Confused

Waspsarearseholes · 15/08/2021 21:33

@Batshittery

It wouldn't bother me, but I'm probably the one who would do it! Not roast potatoes though
Do you find yourself generally friendless and not trusted by others? 😉 I don't think I've ever heard of anyone not liking roasties. They're the only type of spud I actually enjoy rather than tolerate.
Waspsarearseholes · 15/08/2021 21:34

@flameycakes

My ex would always try to get a dip butty using the meat juices.
I'm intrigued about this 'dip butty'. Could you tell me more, please?
70isaLimitNotaTarget · 15/08/2021 21:36

Ha! Yes Poison Tester Grin

When it's roast potatoes or chips , I put the tings on the plate and say DSHB (DS Hold Back) otherwise he's scoff the lot .

As long as no Double Dipping goes on, its fair game

MrsWidgerysLodger · 15/08/2021 21:36

I have been known to (light-heartedly) stab DH with a carving fork for attempting to prematurely snaffle a roast potato! So I get the irritation but it's not the end of the world to me, unless you've previously expressed that it annoys you and they continue to do it. At that point it becomes a problem because they're ignoring your wishes, not because they're cheekily requisitioning a bit of dinner before they should.

WestendVBroadway · 15/08/2021 21:37

Bugger OP, have you been spying on me in the kitchen again?Blush

HalloHello · 15/08/2021 21:38

Unless you're one of those people who prepare only the exact amount each person is allocated then YABU. There is nothing better than a nabbed roastie, parsnip or chicken skin!

Shodan · 15/08/2021 21:39

It doesn't bother me at all, as long as the dishes aren't completely emptied by the time they get to the table...

Except when it was XH. He used to piss me off so much trying to snag pieces of meat while I was carving it. But that was because I didn't like him much by then...

alltheemptyfields · 15/08/2021 21:40

As long as someone doesn't use dirty hands to pick up food from the serving dish, I genuinely cannot see what the issue is Confused

Saidtoomuch · 15/08/2021 21:40

My children are always doing this! I keep trying to tell them it's cook's perogative to pinch the best bits!

Batshittery · 15/08/2021 21:40

Do you find yourself generally friendless and not trusted by others? 😉

I had to think twice about posting my aversion to roasties. It's so outing.
One day I hope to meet a like minded soul Grin

Angryfrommanchester1 · 15/08/2021 21:41

S I do this.... go scavenging around for a bit 🙈

LemonRoses · 15/08/2021 21:41

I do think certain things invite this sort of behaviour. Crispy crackling, the blue bubbly liquorice assorts, the really crispy bit of roast potato, the broken piece of poppadum, chocolate buttons on a tiramisu.

I’d be pleased people were enjoying my cooking.

UndertheCedartree · 15/08/2021 21:42

@HeReWeGoAgAiN1112 - haha 'testing for poison' is always my excuse for having a little bite of a treat I give my DD! Grin

Oysterbabe · 15/08/2021 21:42

Depends who it is. Family member? No issue. Guest? Bit rude.

6fingerkitkat · 15/08/2021 21:43

Is this the CF who dared to only feed the DS lasagne trying to justify why there wasn't enough roast for him ?

Trivium4all · 15/08/2021 21:44

If it's a festive dinner, or something similar where the cook has taken care in presentation, then yes, it's rude. As is starting to eat before everyone has their food in front of them. Generally, the rule I was taught was that you wait until the host has taken the first bite (traditionally, the lady of the house, but now modernised to whoever is in charge of the cooking). However, the more important rule is not to get caught when you do snaffle a bite ahead of time! ;-) It's rude to let people think that you want to grab the best bite for yourself (even if that's naturally exactly what you're doing!).

2reefsin30knots · 15/08/2021 21:44

DH and I went to a college where there was communal dining (with service) a la Hogwarts. Sometimes the plates of food would be lined up the middle of the tables before students received their plates. On roast days, it was common for the roast potatoes to be gone before plates were dished out. The boys would just load them into their pockets.

Clearly a British institution.

Flatdisco · 15/08/2021 21:44

I think unless they take loads of food or you didn't cook enough it's no big deal to eat a potato or something before serving

2reefsin30knots · 15/08/2021 21:46

@6fingerkitkat

Is this the CF who dared to only feed the DS lasagne trying to justify why there wasn't enough roast for him ?
Obviously does not compare to being given a ping-meal in place of the roasties Grin