To not want my 17 year old dad to drive 20 miles away.

[Kaylasmum49]

My dad has just passed her driving test on Friday, I’m so pleased for her as she failed first time and was devastated. She has asked me if she go on a drive to a small town 20 miles away with her friends tomorrow. Of course I have said yes but I am really worried. The road is a dual carriageway all the way but there have been many serious accidents on that road. My dad is a sensible driver but I’m worried that when she has her friends in the car she will show off and not concentrate as well she should. I want to ask her not to go but I know she will be disappointed if I do.

Dad?

Obviously that should be dd!

I'd be nervous too. Has she driven alone yet?

Presume you mean DD?

I’d be worried as well.

But she’s passed her test so is deemed to be safe.

She drove a mile to work today and has driven the road while learning a couple of times so it’s not completely new to her.

I do t think it’s the 20 miles or the dual carriageway which is the issue. It’s ‘with her friends’. I asked DD to stick to just one other passenger for a little while (though on a couple of occasions I approved 2 sensible ones). I didn’t make it a rule, just asked. She agreed.

She passed her test,she can drive her car. She's 17. Leave her to it op.

Try and think of it this way, dual carriage way=60mph, she'll only be about 20 minutes, it's not that long really. By the time you've made yourself a cuppa and sat down she'll be almost there 😊

My DS hasn’t passed his test (got a month until his test) but he has already said he doesn’t want to drive with friends in the car for a while, which I hope he sticks to.
I wouldn’t feel happy with him driving 20 miles with a group of friends in the car so soon after passing his test.

@cardibach

I do t think it’s the 20 miles or the dual carriageway which is the issue. It’s ‘with her friends’. I asked DD to stick to just one other passenger for a little while (though on a couple of occasions I approved 2 sensible ones). I didn’t make it a rule, just asked. She agreed.

Agree with this, difficult to concentrate on driving with excited friends in car. You need them to be sensible and realise she is a very new driver and distractions will affect her.

If I was the parent of one of her friends I'd be concerned too.
Are they aware she only passed her test on Friday?

It will be two friends and they are pretty sensible girls but I just worry that all the chatter will affect my dd’s driving

Is she assertive & sensible enough to tell them to shut up when needed, e.g when joining the dual carriageway and at roundabouts?

Where I live we have graduated licenses for just this reason. We start driving younger, but once you get a license you can’t have friends in the car for a couple of years.

I would probably ask her to humor you and do a closer trip first, but in reality, it should be fine.

No, not with friends in so soon. Needs to do a few solo drives and get used to it first.

My 18yo passed 3 weeks ago so I understand the fear but it has to be up to her.

The day I passed my test I got home, sorted insurance out, then ran straight out of the door for a four hour drive all over the place.

I was so happy If she's passed her test I don't know why you would try to stop her.

Can she drive you there first as a test run, so she has practiced recently and you can chat on the way there to mimic her being with friends?

"but I’m worried that when she has her friends in the car she will show off"

Then surely you say no?

Being behind the wheel isn't the time to show off!

Do she has passed her test and presumably has a car
But has to ask permission from mummy before she can drive her car
Time to cut the apron strings

She will be fine. I passed my driving test and drove 300 miles back to uni the weekend after. You don’t learn until you pass your test!

DD passed her test in May, I found out there was an agreement between parents that their DDs wouldn't passenger until the new driver has been driving for at least 3 weeks. Initially I thought it a bit OTT but after speaking with DD, it became sensible in my mind.

She may actually be safer. After just passing her test she will be driving to all the right rules and will also very aware of all hazards around.
I passed my test and had to pick the kids up from school in a brand new 7 seater I'd never drive before!
Have faith in her!!

We let our son drive all over the place when he passed his test, he couldn't wait to have his freedom. He passed first time, 3 months after his 17th birthday but he is very worldy and independent. He is also very sensible and would not hesitate to tell his friends to shut up if they distracted him. I think you know your daughter, her driving abilities and the roads in your area

@IncludeWomenInThePrequel

The day I passed my test I got home, sorted insurance out, then ran straight out of the door for a four hour drive all over the place.

I was so happy If she's passed her test I don't know why you would try to stop her.

Exactly. Rite of passage. I went over 100 miles and back in a day to the seaside a few weeks after passing my test.