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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Or is this taking the Michael

46 replies

dryasaboner · 14/08/2021 15:37

When your other half comes back from playing golf then proceeds to come back after 5 hours away then lie on the sofa and fall asleep

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HalloHello · 14/08/2021 15:38

What do you want him to do instead? Did you tell him you had plans for him?

Hopdathelf · 14/08/2021 15:38

What else should he be doing? Hard to judge unless you give more context about your household and plans for the day.

MaMelon · 14/08/2021 15:39

Yep, it’s taking the p. Poor lamb - he must be all tuckered out. I hope you’re heading out the door to the nearest coffee shop with a good book?

GoodnightGrandma · 14/08/2021 15:39

Wake him up in time to make your tea 😉

dryasaboner · 14/08/2021 15:39

Nothing really but surely wouldn't hurt him to do some chores

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Booboosweet · 14/08/2021 15:39

It wouldn't bother me too much.

putthebinsout · 14/08/2021 15:39

Depends what it is you had planned or what he's supposed to be doing?

A long game of golf followed by a nap sounds lovely

dryasaboner · 14/08/2021 15:40

@putthebinsout

Depends what it is you had planned or what he's supposed to be doing?

A long game of golf followed by a nap sounds lovely

It's a mans life
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Hopdathelf · 14/08/2021 15:41

Well why don’t you get a hobby too?

putthebinsout · 14/08/2021 15:41

Chores? Sounds like a joyless day to me! Unless you've got a ton of kids and had them on your own all week or something but even then I don't think a quick nap after sports is really a crime

Biancadelrioisback · 14/08/2021 15:41

Depends if this is a weekly occurrence or a one off.
One off would be absolutely fine.

Snoozer11 · 14/08/2021 15:42

Why can't he do chores when he wakes up?

VladmirsPoutine · 14/08/2021 15:43

As pointed out it's hard to say whether or not he's taking the piss. If this is a regular occurrence and you have children that would be a problem but if it's just a random lazy day then it sounds rather lovely.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 14/08/2021 15:46

What were you doing while he was playing golf?

If you were running around doing the housework/food shopping/gardening/chores etc. Then YANBU.

But if you were off meeting friends, having a lie-in or having your hair or nails done, then YABU.

Does he usually help out at home?

icedcoffees · 14/08/2021 15:47

Unless you're about to drip feed that you have multiple young children that need looking after or a dog that needs walking, I think YABU.

It's the weekend - isn't the entire point to do your hobbies, relax and chill out after a busy week?

DH and I went out this morning but he's currently upstairs asleep and I"m curled up on the sofa watching trash TV and eating Malteasers Grin

lineeyesneeded · 14/08/2021 15:47

Depends really? Do you have young kids who need looking after/entertaining?
If so, then yes he should have given you a bit of time out too but if not I'd just leave him to have his lazy day!

dryasaboner · 14/08/2021 15:48

@Hopdathelf

Well why don’t you get a hobby too?
When would I have time to
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debka · 14/08/2021 15:50

Mine is playing golf this afternoon. He often has a nap when he gets in. Yesterday he looked after (my) children, did all the washing and ironing, finished decorating the hall, which he started this week, and hung two big pictures.
I really don't begrudge him golf and a nap. I'll have dinner ready for when he gets in, too.

DancingInTheGarden · 14/08/2021 15:51

Do you have children? Have you been looking after them alone?
People need context to this.
If you are child-free and this is your weekend then super.
If you are pretty much a single parent with a H who goes out for his own activity then comes back and sleeps while you continue to be a single parent then yanbu

TidyDancer · 14/08/2021 15:51

In itself, it doesn't sound like he's done anything wrong. But context is everything. What specifically did you want/need him to do? Do you have DCs?

Freddiefox · 14/08/2021 15:51

Why don’t you have time op?

GoWalkabout · 14/08/2021 15:51

I spent this morning running 13 miles and the rest of today napping and not moving. Tomorrow we have guests so I will do chores then. DH is always shattered after a bike ride on the weekend. But our kids are older, we muddle through with chores fitting them around what we want to do. When they were little there was just so much to do that a whole day 'off' at a weekend would have put too much on the other person. If you feel lonely or annoyed about it then you should definitely have a conversation about it.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 14/08/2021 15:57

When would I have time to

Why do you now have the time?

Do you have kids? An exhausting job? Are you a carer?

It's really difficult to offer practical advice without context/more information.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 14/08/2021 15:57

'not' not 'now'. Sorry for typo.

dryasaboner · 14/08/2021 16:03

Have two older kids and one five year old . He's a hurricane

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