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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Paying for GCSE results

110 replies

Lilyargin · 12/08/2021 16:47

Some of my DD's (16) friends' parents are giving their children £50 for each 9 they get, £20 for each 8, £10 for each 7 and £5 for each 6.
Am I alone in feeling that you shouldn't put monetary value on academic success; that it de-values the real joy which is in the pride of the achievement by reducing it to a pay per grade transaction?
Or am I just mean?

OP posts:

AlexaShutUp · 12/08/2021 22:05

No, I wouldn't ever do this. I think it's better for kids to find their own motivation.

DD got straight 9s today. The reward is in how happy she feels. That's enough.

EIRA3 · 12/08/2021 22:07

18 years ago when I did my GCSEs my uncle did this for me. My parents were low earners we didn't have much. I started to withdraw from school and couldn't b bothered really!
He said if I put my head down and worked hard he would pay me £100 A* £80A and so on. So I started year 11 went to every lesson, did extra too (best attendance ever) and ended up doing really well, to the shock of everyone! But he paid me and I was so happy that I achieved the results I had, and the financial incentive really pushed me and I am so grateful
My son is 13 I will do the same for him come yr11 just to help in anyway I can.

LunaAndHerMoonDragons · 12/08/2021 22:17

I think it depends on why they're not performing to potential. If they're lazy but capable or capable but scared to try a cash incentive might help. Some people will never be motivated by intrinsics of getting a good grade, so extrinsic motivation might be best. As an adult at work they're are sometimes extrinsic motivation to work harder like, praise, bonuses, promotions.

If DC are hard working, but are only ever going to get so so grades or not pass due to cognitive delays or SEN then rewarding outcomes would be unfair and demotivating. Id prefer to reward effort if anything, but if my DC needed an extrinsic reward to achieve their potential I'd consider it.

Bagamoyo1 · 12/08/2021 22:53

@AlexaShutUp

No, I wouldn't ever do this. I think it's better for kids to find their own motivation.

DD got straight 9s today. The reward is in how happy she feels. That's enough.

I’m guessing you haven’t had problems with her motivation! It’s easy when you don’t have the issue in the first place.

AlexaShutUp · 12/08/2021 22:56

I’m guessing you haven’t had problems with her motivation! It’s easy when you don’t have the issue in the first place.

No, but I have been mindful of the importance of intrinsic motivation since she was tiny. Never did rewards or punishments of any sort.

hernamewas · 12/08/2021 22:59

I was offered a LOT more than this and still got failed them all. It doesn't change anything just do what works for your family and don't worry about others.

therocinante · 12/08/2021 23:09

I was a lazy bastard who got all 9 A*s and 3 As. My sister, who worked her arse off, got Cs, Ds, and one B.

That system would just have rewarded me for being good at exams and clever, while she would have been (comparatively) penalised for being less academic, while being MUCH harder working.

Seems like a stupid system to me. But maybe I'm just bitter I didn't get £450...

LEMtheoriginal · 12/08/2021 23:15

Got DDs results today. She smashed it and i couldn't be more proud. Her reward was an impromptu day out and oh, the small matter of a place in 6th form doing her chosen subjects. Oh and i went on a roller coaster with her despite being terrified she said laughing at my shreiking and swearing all the way round was her best reward! Bugger

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 12/08/2021 23:21

I did not offer any incentive to my child. Just a whole lot of nagging about how important it was.
She got a 4, a 6 and a load of 5’s…which for her was an excellent result. I had to go out after we’d picked her results up this morning. I returned with a brand new laptop as a present for her - to help her a level studies.

We rewarded the effort she’d put in off her own back (after my nagging )

noangel1811 · 12/08/2021 23:31

I just read this to my 15 year old ds he said if Im willing but match these he will work harder to get better scores 😂 my son has suffered with his mental health for the last 18 months, self harming and refusing to go to school. He is on counselling to and has been much better for the last 3 months so in our circumstances I don’t think I would mind offering him these incentives to get better grades as it will probably encourage him to go into school more too. But I can definitely see it from both sides. A year ago I wouldn’t have been in a position financially to be able to do this

SingingInTheShithouse · 12/08/2021 23:45

We did for both GCSEs & this weeks A-Levels. But it was for all her hard work & amazing strength. She was up against massive odds, given that she'd been very ill for a long time, missed years of school & still struggled with health problems, so she's deserved it & it's just so happened that she's also blown everyone away with her actual results

sleepylittlebunnies · 13/08/2021 00:39

My parents couldn’t have afforded to financially incentivise me for GCSE grades as we had very little money. I had free school dinners and as they couldn’t afford to give pocket money, I had a paper round, a Saturday job and regular babysitting.

I was always expected to do my best and I did, I got A’s, B’s and C’s. My parents had gone from leaving school at 15 straight into full time work. They were thrilled with my efforts as I wasn’t an academic and the 3 C’s I got were expected to be D’s in mocks. I really don’t think money would have got me any higher grades, perhaps if I could have afforded to give up my little jobs to have more study time. Anyway I managed to get to university level study and qualified as a nurse, so not a huge financial incentive there either .

gobackanddoitproperly · 13/08/2021 02:08

I’ve paid my kids for their results since primary school.

ShitShop · 13/08/2021 02:32

It ends up like the tooth fairy or Father Christmas though, in that some kids will get loads, and others nothing. I can’t afford to pay my son £100 for each grade 9 as it would cost me nearly a grand (stealth boast!) so I took him out for a burger, and told he was a clever sausage. Wish I could afford to be more generous and I’m sure lots of his friends will be rolling in their GCSE £££s now. I just hope he understands. I know he worked hard for his own sense of achievement not for any other reason but I’d hate for him to feel let down.

SupermanWithTheGreyHair · 13/08/2021 03:25

My son got his GCSE results last year. We gave him money on results day with a card but hadn’t mentioned it to him before. He’d have got the same amount regardless of grades, the card was sealed with the cash inside days before. He’d worked hard and it was some money to spend over the summer...although he didn’t spend much due to bloody covid. He wasn’t expecting anything, he was happy with his results and the money was just a bonus.

drpet49 · 13/08/2021 06:31

* Hell no. It diminishes the intrinsic worth of education.*

^45% of A Levels students achieving A grade diminishes the intrisinic worth of education.

GreenLakes · 13/08/2021 08:16

Personally I don’t think paying for each grade is a fair system as each DC has a different ability.

In my house, we reward instead for hard work and effort. I pay £1 for every hour of non-compulsory revision that is completed.

JollyAndBright · 13/08/2021 08:24

Two and a bit years ago Dnephew had already signed up to go into the the navy a couple of months after his GCSEs so he really didn’t give a toss how he did and admitted he wasn’t going to try.
We decided to give him a financial incentive to try harder.
We offered him £50 for a C, £100 for a B and £250 for an A.

It worked and he went into the navy with three C’s two B’s, the rest were D’s.
It was significantly better than the grades he was predicted which where pretty much all below that.

TractorAndHeadphones · 13/08/2021 08:40

@LunaAndHerMoonDragons

I think it depends on why they're not performing to potential. If they're lazy but capable or capable but scared to try a cash incentive might help. Some people will never be motivated by intrinsics of getting a good grade, so extrinsic motivation might be best. As an adult at work they're are sometimes extrinsic motivation to work harder like, praise, bonuses, promotions. If DC are hard working, but are only ever going to get so so grades or not pass due to cognitive delays or SEN then rewarding outcomes would be unfair and demotivating. Id prefer to reward effort if anything, but if my DC needed an extrinsic reward to achieve their potential I'd consider it.

I find it strange to have people bang on about ‘intrinsic motivation’. Not everyone likes exams or sees their point. But they could have intrinsic motivation for something they enjoy, like music for example. As adults nobody works for ‘intrinsic motivation’. Some people like their jobs , yes but given a lottery win most would probably quit and never look back. Also people wouldn’t generally take on more responsibility for no career succession would they? I guess the intrinsic motivation comes from the wanting to do a good job and putting in effort. But again people do put in effort for things that they like.

TheWayTheLightFalls · 13/08/2021 08:40

I went to a private school abroad with a very wealthy cohort. There were kids incentivised with money and new cars (!) for certain grades, but it was exclusively the dim kids.

TractorAndHeadphones · 13/08/2021 08:41

*career success

sashh · 13/08/2021 08:46

Thus happened at my school 31 years ago! I got a card

In my day it was O Levels, I got my mum ringing the parents of two relatives who took exams at the same time, compared notes and then made up her own scale to show how I'd done better than one and about the same as the other.

My grandmother and one of the relatives both gave me some money, nothing from my parents.

ihearttc · 13/08/2021 08:54

We’ve given DS a monetary value related to every grade he got. My DH suggested it back in September when they started back to Y11 as an incentive. DS worked incredibly hard throughout both lockdowns when most of his friends were gaming all day and night so it was sort of reward based around that.
It was x amount for 9, x amount for 8 etc. DS didn’t get any 8’s or 9’s…he got mostly 7’s but has walked away with a substantial amount of money which he is using to buy stuff for 6th form (which I would have had to pay for anyway). So it’s a reward for his hard work but he is buying stuff he needs with it to progress further.

Knittedfairies · 13/08/2021 09:40

It's a long time since my daughter took her GCSEs, but we rewarded her for her efforts right after the exams, so before the results.

PolkadotsAndMoonbeams · 13/08/2021 09:46

My grandparents started it with my cousins as an incentive. They then did it with my family too (we're all younger), so it was fair, but capped it when they saw our results.

I didn't mind really, I wanted the grades. It was a nice though. I bought a necklace with it that I still wear, so I think of that as them being proud of my grades, rather than the cash if that makes sense.

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