AIBU to have sent my son away?

[kravestix]

I woke up today and realised I couldn't do it all again for another day. DS is three. My house is a shit hole. He trashes it. He doesn't listen to me. He constantly wants to do things he shouldn't be and no matter what I say or do it's nigh on impossible to get him to stop. I'm exhausted with it all. Mentally exhausted. I've got £1.08 in the bank to last until 25th. A water leak in my bedroom. Assesors from Home Insurance are coming tomorrow but I've got to try and get the house sorted first because they'll probably trip over something or catch something nasty and end up in Hospital. I've phoned DM this morning and she's coming to pick DS up and take him back to hers. I'll either pick him up tomorrow after work or Saturday morning depending on how she copes with him! I'm doing some gardening for someone on Saturday afternoon for fifty quid which I'll make last until the 25th. Just exhausted with the drudgery.

You need to divide and conquer, make that clear to DH.

I'm starting to understand why you're at breaking point... Your DH

DH did help without me asking but I don't think he did quite as much as me. I have now managed to get the entire upstairs done including hoovering off the stairs. DH took a few bags of rubbish downstairs and some dirty washing but not sure what else he did really 🤔 Don't think I'll get much more done tonight. Still need to shower. Still need to do kitchen. Living room isn't too bad but does need a hoover. And garden still needs doing.

YANBU my DS is like this! Only problem is no one will have him and he wouldn't stay out anyway, glued to my hip!! Can I borrow your DM?🤣

@ZiggZagg

YANBU my DS is like this! Only problem is no one will have him and he wouldn't stay out anyway, glued to my hip!! Can I borrow your DM?🤣

Awww, haha! No way. I'm keeping DM to myself.

Everything was coming together and then everything went to shit again. Got my house semi sorted. DS was having a great time with DM. Arranged to pick him up on Saturday instead of Friday. Lovely. Extra day to get things sorted. Got offered a job interview for Saturday Morning at 9am. Fab. That'll ease ease financial pressure. Assesors for Home Insurance came Friday. Everything seemed to be going great. Well. Assesors said the Water Leak wasn't covered by Home Ins. Great. Then DM called us at 2am Saturday Morning. DS had developed croup and she was very worried. So DH and I had to drive down there at 3am and stay. So then I missed my interview at 9am this Morning as we were out of town at DMs. 🤣

Yanbu at all- sounds exhausting

OP it sounds like you need more support from your DH.

Given your precarious financial state why on earth did you both go to DMs? Or why not bring him back at 3am? That way you could have gone to the interview. I know you’re exhausted but if DH had picked up the slack here you could have managed.

Leaving the bin and litter tray till it smells is not good enough.

Not pulling his weight when you’ve told him you’re at breaking point is not good enough.

Hi OP hope your son is OK. You do have a lot on your plate. I think you should have a think about your husband’s input here. I notice that you talk about trying to get him to “help” you which suggests you think all household stuff and childcare is your sole responsibility. He is not helping you. He is doing his share. He is an adult with a child and a house therefore responsibilities. He thinks helping you is an option. Maybe try and have a conversation with him about what chores he will routinely do without being asked and what you will do. If he continues to see it as helping you he will see it as an option for him. An option that is not v attractive compared to lying on the sofa watching the telly in his goonie! It sounds as if you are doing the lion share of housework and childcare. You’re going to uni and trying to find a job that will work round that. That’s a lot. What does your husband bring to the table? x

What a shame. Sorry your plans got derailed and hope your boy is better soon. Steamy bathrooms are good for sudden onset of croup but they do need close watching.
You did absolutely the right thing getting help from DM and you did really well with the clear up until all of this happened.
I actually think you sound really good at planning and getting on with things
Don’t let it get you down. Things will get better. It’s not long to September. Well done for getting onto your course.
Can you contact the interviewers to reschedule?
It’s probably not the time to have a massive showdown with DP re housework today as you sound worn out but if you can have that talk in a positive way soon, it should help. He lives there too, he’s a parent too and needs to pull his weight.
Keep on keeping on, you’ll get there.