What tiny things have you done to specifically annoy someone?

[FlyingSoHigh]

My Mil came from a pretty wealthy family and definitely saw herself as a 'cut above' most people.
So I always used to chop carrots into rounds when she came for a meal as I knew she thought it was 'common'; posh people always cut carrots into sticks.
It was a tiny thing but it gave me so much pleasure over the years.
Can anyone beat passive-aggressive cooked carrots?

@c190

Not me, but someone I once worked with. He wasn't originally from this country, and found a security guard used to follow him all around a particular shop. So one day, he knew what he was going to buy, and made sure he had the EXACT money for it. He picked up all the goods, and then walked straight out of the shop (making sure the security guard was watching him), and dropped the money in the bin inside the shop door. Security man, finally pleased to have caught his suspected shoplifter comes charging out after him. He innocently explains, in very broken English (he is fluent, he got his PhD in the UK), that he had paid, he put his money in the machine. Security guard then asks what machine, and he points to the bin. Security guard then had to empty said bin, where he did indeed find the exact money. My friend was never followed by him again lol!

I don’t get that - he put the money in the bin? Surely things that are purchased have to go through the till or they’re not bought?

@c190

Not me, but someone I once worked with. He wasn't originally from this country, and found a security guard used to follow him all around a particular shop. So one day, he knew what he was going to buy, and made sure he had the EXACT money for it. He picked up all the goods, and then walked straight out of the shop (making sure the security guard was watching him), and dropped the money in the bin inside the shop door. Security man, finally pleased to have caught his suspected shoplifter comes charging out after him. He innocently explains, in very broken English (he is fluent, he got his PhD in the UK), that he had paid, he put his money in the machine. Security guard then asks what machine, and he points to the bin. Security guard then had to empty said bin, where he did indeed find the exact money. My friend was never followed by him again lol!

Which shops in this country permit you to pay by putting money into a bin? Ignoring the till? What am I missing?

The carol "O Holy Night" is often played by bands as an instrumental piece with the solo line given to a trumpeter who, in the normal run of things, doesn't know the words and plays the music in the way that seems best to them. That is, with the natural break after the long high note: absolutely fine, unless you are, as S1 is, a band member who also sings in a church choir. He was very vocal in his disapproval.

So when after a gap of a couple of years we got O Holy Night out to rehearse, I sang
O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shiii [breath]
Ning it is the night

Fortunately my little boy has a sense of humour

@WolfFleeceSpotter that is genius! The image I have is hilarious!

[quote FlamingoQueen]@smoothieooo
There We Are Then! Love it and am stealing it [/quote]
So am I

Are you suggesting that your friend was doing a ‘dumb foreigner’ act? Because that is more disturbing than the behaviour of the security guard.

I once tidied my sister's half of the bedroom because I was mad at her - it made perfect sense at the time. She, apparently totally sincerely, thanked me for doing such a nice thing

When DH is being irksome I’ll find a reason to refer to his “knickers” rather than pants. “I’ve just put away a pile of your clean knickers”
I also refer to his wallet as his “purse”.

When I was at college, there was a girl, who for no reason at all, just didn't like me. She once said to me "God, your laugh is so fake" another time I heard her say "omg, I can't stand her laugh"
I had a loud laugh, always have done, I used to be quite self conscious about it, but after she said that, whenever I found something funny , I would laugh even louder , just to annoy her. Petty, I know but satisfying. She was a pretty miserable person.

Cooking bacon and eggs for breakfast after my rotten neighbours had been up until 4 am playing music and drinking in their garden. Not a special occasion just regular thing.
I believe there is nothing quite like that smell when you wake up with a massive hangover...

A boss that bullied me. He made me work one weekend when I had the flu. As it was the weekend the offices were empty including his. I went into his office and coughed over everything, including a spitty cough on his phone mouth piece.

@LokiOfAsgard

Devices that turn off TV screens

Really easy to find. Look for a universal remote control app on your phone. I use them in pubs when we're given the booths with the little TV's in that are almost always showing bloody Bing.

Reminds me of sitting with DH at a tiny table in the corner of a nice pub, having a lovely meal - except there was an electric light on the table which was shining right in my eyes. DH cut to the chase, reached down & switched it off at the socket. Much better.

The waiter came back with something, saw the light was out & apologised that it had failed. We didn't let on. He went off & came back with a candle & lit it for us. As soon as he'd gone DH blew it out.

The waiter didn't try any more after that. I don't know why but it felt like we'd been so naughty.

My ex FiL, when staying with us, would make a point of departing for the loo, with great pomp and ceremonial each time a meal was ready. My countermove was to go into the lounge 5 mins before each meal and say, “Dinner will be ready in 5 minutes so would anyone who would like to use the bathroom please do so now.” He trotted off meekly but the next evening he ignored the “request”, waited till all were assembled at the table and said, “Oh I think I might as well go while I’m up.” I proceeded to serve the meal anyway, including his, and said to the rest of them, “Eat up everyone, while it’s nice and hot”

Very petty of both of us, but this was the man who used to ask me whether I preferred (say) A or B. I might answer “A” and he would change the subject then 5 mins later say something like, “Anyone who likes A is a brainless idiot” 🤣

*ceremony

@Eviebeans

Cooking bacon and eggs for breakfast after my rotten neighbours had been up until 4 am playing music and drinking in their garden. Not a special occasion just regular thing. I believe there is nothing quite like that smell when you wake up with a massive hangover...

you missed a trick. Fish on the bbq.. sardines or other smellies that taste delicious on that grill.

nothing better for a hungover neighbour that a fishy smoke from next door's breakfast.

@TheCrowening

I work in/around the family law field and there’s one particular lawyer who regularly seems to get the name of the children wrong. It drives me bonkers as it’s such a basic yet key part of the work. I’ve taken to calling him a different name each time we meet. He knows why. It’s petty but ultimately satisfying.

I've done similar. When a man refused to give me his name for some reason, I guess he thought it was funny. So every single time i saw him I called him a different name. Morning trevor Charles, David, Chris, Jonathan, Went on until I left that area,. I thought it was hilarious, him not so much.

A former boss wanted his teabag dipped in the cup precisely 7 times before the milk was added. 50% of the time I dipped it 6 times. The other 50%, 8 times. Funny how life turns out-He ended up working for me many years later......

Second thing is that DSIL said my 15 year old DD dresses inappropriately. She doesn't..... She happens to have a fabulous, healthy figure as she is sporty and eats healthily....but I will make damn sure she is dressed in her most 'inappropriate' clothes from now on whenever we see SIL.

@Sparklfairy

Drank pints instead of halves in front of my mother

I did this too

They had to move their Merc from outside their own house to accommodate it. They had the cheek to ask me to move my car out of the way so they could reposition the skip and get their own car infront of their house

Bloody cheeky! How on earth did they try to justify that you should do that?!

After20 odd years with DP, I have a few micro aggressions that give me pleasure 🤣
Mismatch the crusts on a sandwich
Scrape the butter tub with a knife when getting it out
Put his sock on the right foot first (he had back trouble)

@BamberGascoine

So sorry to derail but this thread reminds me of a past thread. Something about an OP who had a friend whose family had a long running joke lr something. But you couldn’t be told the joke you had to work it out. Does anyone remember it? This thread makes me think it was all a wind up🤣🤣🤣

OH GOD NO that thread was beyond irritating. I lost hours to that thing trying to work it out!

I do all the communication to dhs ex. Because she's so vile to him and uses child as a weapon. Solicitors in the past have told him to have no contact and go through a 3rd party. She wanted it to be his mum as she knows she can equally piss her off.
Where as me, she never ever 'wins' because I don't rise to her patheticness trying to make out dsc has issues here.
Last weeks email was dcs had a 0.6cm diameter bruise on her shin! And needed an explanation in the next 60 min before seeking legal advice! Yes less than a cm, a child who had been to parks, woods, seaside and go ape..
A black eye I'd understand but kids get bruises!

I replied there is no explanation other than dsc was having outdoor fun so could have happened at any point dsc didn't mention Injuries but if you feel the need to seek legal advice please feel free to do so, we look forward to hearing from you regarding the outcome.

My thing that I do specifically to annoy my DH is refuse to come/answer if he stands in another room and shouts for me. He seems subconsciously to think I should just drop everything I'm doing and go find him whenever he yells since it's too much trouble for him to actually come and find me

DH does this. I’ve only recently realised. Now, after many years, I have started to become selectively deaf, he still keeps shouting but he now does it whilst coming to find me

I also left it 24 hours before replying.

In a job I once had there was a newly-joined department manager who kept asking for my files and then giving the work to my junior - permanently, so basically she was managing me out. She was a complete bitch and I knew what she was doing. Unfortunately for her, she didn't know our particular accounting software as well as I did.
We had a very complicated accounts package, which dealt with several companies in the group, produced all their accounts and also combined them all for the holding company's accounts, VAT returns, the lot. I'd written a lot of the programs and reporting structures. They couldn't be fiddled with unless you knew the ramifications, and my handwritten notes & test reports were fairly important in the grand scheme of things. I noticed in the weeks before I left, that she and my junior had slightly changed a few of the report structures. I slightly changed a couple more. Nothing drastic, but it meant that the totals wouldn't always add up right.
I then shredded every single handwritten note and procedural document I could find. I'd been there a while, so there was a lot. I also deleted every single spreadsheet template as well.
My last day was joyous.