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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Families should have more space than couples

274 replies

CrunchiestCru · 09/08/2021 08:19

Employer provides accommodation, existing employees can request to move within as needed. AIBU to expect that a family would get the larger accommodation over a couple?

OP posts:
54321nought · 09/08/2021 08:20

sounds like you are targeting a specific couple, and want their home

So yes, that would be very unreasonable of you

IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves · 09/08/2021 08:21

I'd expect an appropriate number of bedrooms.

SalsaLove · 09/08/2021 08:21

It depends on the guidelines.

Potteringshed · 09/08/2021 08:23

Not enough info. You seem to be angling to get people to agree with you. I feel like there may be another side to this.

PyjamaFan · 09/08/2021 08:24

Need more info.

But it does sound like you want a couple to move out if their home so you can have it. Which doesn't sound very reasonable!

Happy36 · 09/08/2021 08:25

If one family has 6 kids and is given a 4 bedroom home on the basis that their children share, should a family with 2 kids be given a 2 bedroom home and the same expectation?

If the accommodation is part of the remuneration package then it should be the same for all employees just as those with children don't get a higher salary or bonus.

ConstantlySeekingHappiness · 09/08/2021 08:25

There are too many variables.

What exactly is the issue?

Happy36 · 09/08/2021 08:26

As SalsaLove says, it depends on what the employer has agreed to provide.

DDiva · 09/08/2021 08:26

I would expect families to be considered for a larger space over a couple when its available. I wouldn't expect a couple established in accommodation to move for a family.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 09/08/2021 08:27

With DHs employer is was a mix of family size and job. Did mean that a couple could be in a four bed and a family with three kids in a 3 bed.

But the 4 bed cost more.

DeathByWalkies · 09/08/2021 08:27

Sounds like you want a specific couple to give up their home because you've been producing children and they haven't.

Firstly, why should they, and secondly, for all you know they're suffering from fertility issues, which would add an extra layer of injustice.

It's your job to provide for your children, not your employer's, so you may just have to go into private rented like the rest of us if you want more space.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 09/08/2021 08:27

It depends on the employers rules. If its based on a waiting list and the couple have been on it for ages and a family have recently joined the list, it would be unfair to expect to go to the top of the list.

PyjamaFan · 09/08/2021 08:27

Agree with PP above. If accommodation is part of salary package then everyone on same band gets the same.

I worked overseas and had a flat as part of my package. I had 2 bedrooms despite being single and childfree because that wasn't relevant to my job.

MargosKaftan · 09/08/2021 08:28

Depends if the employee has to stay at the accommodation or are free to live elsewhere. (For both, so if the couple has a role that they must stay on site, then I would presume their accommodation would be better than a family who don't need to be on site all the time.)

Depends if certain accommodation is reserved for particular roles.

Depends if the couple are already in a property would they need to be removed from it to give the family a bigger property.

DinosaurDiana · 09/08/2021 08:29

I don’t think a couple should be moved out for a family. I think you should wait your turn for a suitable sized home.

Original poster
CrunchiestCru · 09/08/2021 08:29

As in accommodation is empty why would you assign a couple a larger accommodation when families could have it?

OP posts:
JingsMahBucket · 09/08/2021 08:30

Couples are also families. They just happen to not have children. Some couples may also need the extra space due to needing a separate office or what have you. They could also be expecting a child and haven't told anyone other than the employer.

Suck it up.

CherieBabySpliffUp · 09/08/2021 08:31

Surely the employer is only providing accommodation for their employee. However many bodies come with that employee is down to the employee to fit into the space allocated.

54321nought · 09/08/2021 08:32

actually, no , the more I think of it, the more YABU. The accommodation is part of the salary - so should be the same for everyone.

You don't get a bigger salary if you have more kids

Original poster
CrunchiestCru · 09/08/2021 08:33

Wow vitriol so early on that’s surprised me, equally it’s something I’ve observed rather than thankfully experiencing.

Two people need less space than two, three or four etc. @Happy36 made a good point that remuneration should be equal no matter if children are present or not, sadly employers aren’t that forward thinking.

OP posts:
Hathertonhariden · 09/08/2021 08:33

Are you military? Are the people you object to a different rank?

Original poster
CrunchiestCru · 09/08/2021 08:34

Sorry typo fail there two people need less space than three/four/five etc

OP posts:
Original poster
CrunchiestCru · 09/08/2021 08:35

@Hathertonhariden not military no, that I get along with management having larger accommodation

OP posts:
ConstantlySeekingHappiness · 09/08/2021 08:35

Why don’t you give relevant information then instead of making stupid and vague statements and then people can give better answers.

MrsHuntGeneNotJeremyObviously · 09/08/2021 08:35

Without knowing the circumstances it's hard to be sure. On the face of it if an employer offers accommodation as part of the package then it only appeals to a sought after candidate if it is suitable. If you are on a position where you've specifically been headhunted maybe the employer could off a contribution towards accommodation, if it cannot supply what is needed to make relocation attractive to you.
If you are suggesting that you get priority over couples who have been employed for longer or who have accommodation they already live in, then yabu.