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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should dogs be allowed in more places?

538 replies

Patchworkknitter · 05/08/2021 17:44

I'm a bit hurt today but I don't know if I'm being completely unreasonable.

A friend and I were trying to arrange to meet up. We had sorted what we were doing and then she changed her mind and wanted to change where we did something which would have added another 90 minutes onto the day.

I couldn't do that as my dog would already have been left all day (with 2 dog walks from a dog walker). Even with the dog walker, he couldn't do another 90 minutes. My friend got a bit cross and said I should just get my parents to look after him but they're already looking after him the day before so it wouldn't be fair. I don't like to ask them too often, a bit like people don't like to look after their children too often.

It just seems we always do child friendly places (I'm not a Mum but I try my best to be understanding of her childcare needs). She says she can't afford any additional childcare to that which she already needs for work but I can't afford additional dog care either (I pay £400 a month and don't have a partner to share any costs).

It got me thinking how restrictive it can be having a dog as a single person. I wouldn't change him for the world but it's incredibly difficult. If it was childcare I feel people would be much more understanding.

If I was a mum I could take my children pretty much everywhere.
As a dog owner, I can no longer go to the cinema, to most pubs, to restaurants, to the theatre, shopping, etc without paying out for extra dog care.

I feel dogs should be allowed in more places, more shops, more cafes, more pubs etc. Aibu?

OP posts:
XingMing · 05/08/2021 21:29

@SoupDragon, the expectation in Europe is that dogs are socialised to sit under the table, close by the owner/diner and not disrupt the whole place. If we could teach the population of the UK that this should be the minimum standard for taking children out to eat, the world would be much improved. My dog never ventures into your dining space and would not bark. I don't want your loud children careering around disrupting my enjoyment. No matter how good a time they are having.

HermioneKipper · 05/08/2021 21:30

Erm no. I love dogs (although don’t have one) but absolutely not. I’m afraid too many irresponsible dog owners have nixxed it for you. I don’t want dogs sniffing round me in cafes or jumping up at my kids.

Dogs are allowed in all the pubs/outdoor attractions near me

Mrstamborineman · 05/08/2021 21:33

You are outrageously daft to compare child friendly with dog friendly.
No comparison.

FindYourPorpoise · 05/08/2021 21:36

[quote XelaM]@cjpark I SO agree with this! Kids are so much more unhygienic and unpleasant than dogs[/quote]
I was about to question your claim that kids are less hygienic than dogs and then saw the photo you posted. I think you need to teach your child better hygiene. Confused

RedToothBrush · 05/08/2021 21:37

Should dogs be allowed in more places

No.

Powertothepetal · 05/08/2021 21:37

I honestly think the British public are way too entitled and selfish for this to ever work tbh.

I have been to countries where dogs are allowed in shops, restaurants etc and I thought it was lovely.
But they were very well behaved and under proper control.

Here, i have lost count of the number of out of control/badly trained dogs running at people, jumping, even behaving aggressively.

I was shocked to hear a woman who I always thought very respectable and polite laughing about her dog peeing up a woman’s dress in the garden centre.

Our local pet shop had to put up signs warning people if they let their dog piss on stock then they had to pay for it.
I’ve seen dogs at cafes outside jumping up, barking etc.

The British are just too rude for dogs to be allowed everywhere.

And I say that as both a Brit and a dog owner.

FindYourPorpoise · 05/08/2021 21:38

[quote XingMing]@SoupDragon, the expectation in Europe is that dogs are socialised to sit under the table, close by the owner/diner and not disrupt the whole place. If we could teach the population of the UK that this should be the minimum standard for taking children out to eat, the world would be much improved. My dog never ventures into your dining space and would not bark. I don't want your loud children careering around disrupting my enjoyment. No matter how good a time they are having.[/quote]
You think children should have to sit under the table? Hmm

FrangipaniDeLaSqueegeeMop · 05/08/2021 21:40

@XingMing you think it would be good for the world for children to sit under a table at restaurants?

XingMing · 05/08/2021 21:43

Don't be stupid. Children are socialised by sitting at tables. Dogs aren't.

bigbluebus · 05/08/2021 21:43

This is why I never understand why people decide to get a dog because the DCs are now older and are getting more independent. They've just spent years arranging their entire life around the DCs and just as they start to get a little bit of freedom and independence back, not having to rush hither and thither to be back for the children, they buy a bloody dog! I've seen this multiple times in my friendship circles.

Toddlerteaplease · 05/08/2021 21:45

No. Not everyone likes dogs.

XingMing · 05/08/2021 21:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

MaMelon · 05/08/2021 21:50

And I’m looking at you XingMing, after 18 years on MN (ooh look, I win). Exactly did you mean by that ridiculous post at 21.29?

VodkaSlimline · 05/08/2021 21:52

I get why you are hurt OP, just in case you're still lurking! Personally I don't want to see dogs anywhere I might be, because I find them frightening and unhygienic. But as a childless person with lots of friends who are mums, I do understand. You have made big efforts to accommodate your friends' children and they have not made the same effort to accommodate your new dog. Unfortunately, they do not see your dog the same way you do and they definitely don't see your dog as equivalent to their children. Some would say that is fair enough. I think only other new dog parents will really understand how you feel! And you should seek out those people. Dogs are everywhere post lockdown and most places are only going to get more dog-friendly - there are plenty of places you can go, you just need friends to go with. Get down to the park and make some more doggy friends.

Heatherjayne1972 · 05/08/2021 21:52

Nope
No
No
Not everyone likes dogs

lazylinguist · 05/08/2021 21:55

This is why I never understand why people decide to get a dog because the DCs are now older and are getting more independent. They've just spent years arranging their entire life around the DCs and just as they start to get a little bit of freedom and independence back, not having to rush hither and thither to be back for the children, they buy a bloody dog!

Yep, that's what we did Grin. It is a pain in a way, but we got him on relocating to a rural area. I've certainly met more people, got a lot more exercise and fresh air, and discovered more of my beautiful area than I would have done with no dog. Plus he's gorgeous and the dc adore him! As does the cat Grin.

SusieBob · 05/08/2021 21:59

People actually think that you should be able to take a dog to a fucking cinema?

Fucking hell. The world has gone nuts.

Jasmine11 · 05/08/2021 22:03

There's hardly any dog friendly places near me.

Didn't you research this before you got a dog though? You can't get a dog in an area that is not dog friendly and complain about it, that doesn't make any sense. Where I live it's a very dog friendly area, a few dog cafes and people seem to bring their dogs everywhere with them.

EffOrf · 05/08/2021 22:03

Some shops allow dogs in, our mall is quite dog friendly and I have seen dogs in some of the shops, there is often a bowl of water outside the shops also.

bringincrazyback · 05/08/2021 22:04

@thecatsabsentcojones

I totally agree with you. On holiday in a very dog friendly part of the UK with our dog and she’s been involved in pretty much everything. There’s been no trouble at all, just a lot of sleeping dogs under tables, dogs on beaches running into the sea with their families and dogs meeting other dogs nicely. There’s been no poos under pub tables put it that way!

This is Mumsnet though, full of pious dog haters who can’t live and let live.

And would you class people like myself who are allergic to dogs as 'pious dog haters'? Bit ironic talking about living and letting live after that remark.
LovelyLovelyWarmCoffee · 05/08/2021 22:05

@Kralia

But while we are comparing, dogs also have sharper teeth and louder barks. And nobody is actually allergic to children.
Exactly! Also, children are brought into restaurants etc so they can learn how to behave there. A dog can’t learn not to trigger allergies, drool on the floor or smell.
Indoctro · 05/08/2021 22:07

Dogs are massively tying , that's why people need to think long and hard how it will impact their lives.

We have recently got a puppy after 3 years being dog free, life was a lot simpler in those 3 years and we have had to make huge changes to our lives to accommodate our dog now. But I knew that would be the case as I've always had dogs. But being dog fee was actually nice if I'm honest, and had my kids not really wanted a dog as much as I love them I wouldn't have got one again. I think this will be my last dog, if it lives a full life my kids will be teens by the time he dies and I think I will be dog free as the are very restrictive.

TheFoundations · 05/08/2021 22:09

But a human can learn where the places that don't allow dogs, and be responsible for taking care of their own preferences.

Honestly. There's enough places that do, and enough places that don't. Something for everybody, and nobody has to froth.

Lalliella · 05/08/2021 22:11

No. Fewer in fact.

MintyGreenDream · 05/08/2021 22:15

I've owned dogs all my adult life and they've never stopped me from doing anything.
Cinema 3 hrs max
Meal 2 hours.
Afternoon out 4 hours.
Apart from full days out or overnights you should be able to do as you please.

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