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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Bit cheeky?

119 replies

Nannybyday · 04/08/2021 19:36

I'm a nanny currently in between jobs. I will hopefully be starting with a new family in September. In the meantime I thought I'd just do some ad-hoc work. A family contacted me asking if I could help them out a couple of days a week until I start my new job so I met up with them tonight to have a chat.

They put me on the spot and asked if I'd be happy to reduce my hourly rate, £2 an hour difference. My rate is clearly advertised on my profile so they will have seen that when they contacted me. I said I would go away and think about it and get back to them. They then asked me that if I can't reduce my fee, would I be happy to pick up/drop off mum (she doesn't drive) to work on both days.

Again, I said I would go away and think about it and let them know my decision by tomorrow morning. I can't say I've ever experienced that before, especially the travel request (maybe I'm just lucky). All families that I've worked for have made their own way to and from work. Obviously I've been expected to transport the kids around but that's different. In regards to my fee, she explained that she's still training in her new job so she's on a low salary (I do sympathise but I'm trying to earn a living myself). The dad is a doctor.

AIBU?

OP posts:
KarmaStar · 04/08/2021 20:29

Say no! I'd turn this job down.At this very early stage they are trying to manipulate you to their benefit things will get much worse.
Walk away.🙈💐

Newkitchen123 · 04/08/2021 20:30

What do they do when they get to the supermarket checkout? Ask for a discount?
No. Just no. Your fees are clearly stated

Wishes2020 · 04/08/2021 20:30

If they are taking the piss at this stage, it’s only going to get worse once they have you on the pay role. Tell them to fuck off.

DroopyClematis · 04/08/2021 20:35

If they see you prevaricate now, they'll chance it again.

Purplecatshopaholic · 04/08/2021 20:41

Nope. They are CFs - this will not be the last cheeky request….

Sparkletastic · 04/08/2021 20:45

They might not be reliable payers if this is their attitude.

LadyJaye · 04/08/2021 20:49

No.

Not a nanny, but have been a freelancer/consultant for a lot of years, and while there is always room for negotiation with regard to a rate, learning to recognise potential piss-takers early on is a skill.

These are potential piss-takers. Unless you are incredibly desperate for money, turn them down now and save yourself pain in the long term.

Mary46 · 04/08/2021 20:51

They sound very hard work op. I wouldnt take that on. The errands will keep adding on once u start ....

PandemicAtTheDisco · 04/08/2021 21:02

@Purplecatshopaholic

Nope. They are CFs - this will not be the last cheeky request….
Agree completely with this sentiment. These people are experienced CFs and will play you and take complete advantage. They've shown you exactly how they will act right from the start.

People like this need firm boundaries.

DammedifIdo · 04/08/2021 21:05

If this is how it starts it will continue. I wouldn't personally. You deserve better

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 04/08/2021 21:06

If they started this cheeky fuckery at the interview imagine what they'll come up with next!! Just ditch them,it'll be more aggro than it's worth.

GoWalkabout · 04/08/2021 21:08

It was lovely to meet you, I am only able to work as per my advertised rate and it would be outside my role to provide additional transport. If you wish to proceed on these terms.. But I wouldn't take them on.

WhiskyIrnBru · 04/08/2021 21:09

The dad is a doctor. So not exactly hard up!

Very cheeky imo.

MotionActivatedDog · 04/08/2021 21:11

They put me on the spot and asked if I'd be happy to reduce my hourly rate, £2 an hour difference.

In exchange for what? What in that for you?

Shellfishblastard · 04/08/2021 21:11

YANBU. They clearly cannot afford a nanny and should look for alternative childcare.

We would have loved to have a nanny for a number of reasons but couldn’t quite stretch to it, so we had a wonderful childminder instead.

If it’s your only offer of work and you are relying on it financially, I would be tempted to take the mum to work - your still getting paid for that time anyway and it’s actually less time spent looking after their child/ren.

However, do you usually charge mileage for trips or is that incorporated into your fee? If mileage is separate then they really should pay mileage for this trip. Unless it’s round the corner and maybe I would be less bothered.

You deserve to be paid properly for your time. For me it shows they don’t really value you, or cannot afford your service.

MotionActivatedDog · 04/08/2021 21:14

In future you say “my rate is fixed” and you say it like you mean it. So they know not to ask for anything else.

blahblahblah321 · 04/08/2021 21:18

No chance!

If this is how it starts, how far could the requests go?!

MiddleClassProblem · 04/08/2021 21:38

I’d say no as I’d think that there would be other requests that would pop up.

surreygirl1987 · 04/08/2021 22:16

Just say no if you don't want the job! I'm actually not sure what the big deal is. Yes it's maybe a little cheeky but you're not being forced to say yes! I used to do tutoring, and had my fee clearly stated on my website. Sometimes I did have people asking me to reduce my fee. Whether I negotiated or not depended on how badly I wanted the work!

Cherrysoup · 04/08/2021 22:34

They’re cheeky fuckers. Walk now, or they’ll be asking for the earth within days.

olympicsrock · 04/08/2021 22:43

Very cheeky. I think no thanks is the answer you are looking for!

Seesawmummadaw · 04/08/2021 22:47

Call their bluff. I bet they’ll come up with the money and forget the lift when you say no to their terms.

KnightandDay · 04/08/2021 23:17

No, no and no again!

ThinWomansBrain · 04/08/2021 23:23

if you took the role they'd constantly be pushing boundaries - i'd leave well alone.

ZenNudist · 04/08/2021 23:24

No childcare is in short supply and summer childcare in demand as not everyone wants to do clubs etc given covid.

If you are confident you are asking market rate then I'd have terminated the interview. Very politely said my rate was advertised with my cv. I am assessing a number of options and so let's leave it there as its clearly not a good use of either of our time if we can't meet each others expectations on remuneration.

I wouldn't even have entertained the chauffeur request!