Toddler accused of breaking friend’s washing machine

[JellyJellyTooToo]

I’ll try to keep this as brief as poss but sorry if it’s a bit long….

Was watering a friends flowers while they were away. In the one occasion I took my toddler with me she ran a bit riot and while I was busy watering the plants in the garden she managed to move a few bits around in the house etc.

She wasn’t inside on her own, an older dc was with her but had an operation a few weeks ago and I hadn’t realised she’d sat on the sofa and stopped watching what little one was doing. She really should have told me she wasn’t watching her but didn’t 😒.

Toddler managed to put a flip flop into the washing machine and sprinkle it with washing powder. She may have fiddled with the buttons but certainly didn’t switch it on. Drum was open. I removed the flip flop but just left powder in the machine for them to use when they got back (but forgot to mention it). I didn’t for one minute think she’d broken it.

Yesterday, I received an irate phone call asking what the hell we’d done to the washing machine - I explained about the flip flop. Apparently it wasn’t working at all, no power, lights etc. He slammed the phone down on me.

For background said “friend” is the partner of a dear friend of mine who sadly died. He is an alcoholic and always has been for as long as I’ve known him. I remember my late friend saying how he’d get in funny moods etc but I’ve never seen this side of him before, he’s always been pretty chilled-out around me.

As little one had fiddled with the machine, offered to pay for repair/replacement straight as it could have been her. He won’t take any money. But has obviously gone round the house and checked everything and is now accusing us of peeling a flap of paint off of the door (which was coming off anyway)

However I can’t help thinking that he’s just got into a tizzy and taken it out on me, all this stuff about missed flights and family issues came out and he was very stressed.

He won’t let us go round to look at the machine for ourselves. Apparently his dd has to quarantine

I know it was definitely working before as I used it myself when we stayed there for one night after being in hospital. He said there were no lights on, but when I used it I actually thought that it could be broken as no lights came on until I pressed start. So I can see how it would be easy to think it was broken.

He’s pulled it out, changed the fuse, checked the filter etc. He also hoovered the powder out for some reason.

I can’t help but think that he’s seen the powder in the drum, panicked, fiddled with the machine without checking the manual and settings and then possibly done something to it himself. Or maybe it was always working but he hadn’t changed the setting back or something and he just freaked out.

Our toddler fiddles with out washing machine etc all the time (as well as other things) and has never managed to cause an electrical fault in anything. I just don’t understand how she could possibly have broken it 🤷🏻‍♀️

So…
IABU she broke the machine
Or
IANBU it was some kind of alcoholic episode

[BritWifeInUSA]

@JellyJellyTooToo

I did take responsibility straight away and offered to pay. But he really turned on me and accused us of breaking other things.

He knows we have a toddler so just wished he hadn’t asked me now 😒

And yeah I’m pissed off about the washing powder too - it was foolish of me to take her to a non child-proofed house. Anything could have happened.

But by your own admission you were the last person to use the machine so YOU left the powder etc in your toddler’s reach. Or are you seriously going to try and wriggle out of that one by saying you brought your own powder and didn’t touch his? It’s not his responsibility to child-proof his house when he goes on holiday just because the woman watering his plants has a toddler. He asked you to water the plants, not bring your kids round to run amok,

[Tal45]

No machine breaks from a toddler putting a flip flop in and pressing a few buttons. I don't even know how a person could break a washing machine. I wouldn't agree to water the plants again when he is away as it sounds like it's too much hassle, he knows you have a toddler and that they don't just stay still while you're doing jobs. You've even offered to pay for it so what more can you do. I'd back off as he sounds like a bit of a liability.

[JellyJellyTooToo]

Oh and toddler didn’t stay over night, i stayed with permission with post-OP dc while she was awaiting Covid results

[Shoxfordian]

Yabu

You shouldn’t have let your toddler run round someone else’s house touching anything. Him being an alcoholic is irrelevant

[pigsDOfly]

I'm still trying to understand how your toddle was wandering around (in your words, running riot) in someone else's house unsupervised, moving stuff around, opened the washing machine and then had access to washing power to pour some in the machine.

How old was the child that was supposed to be supervising her?

As pp said, you're very lucky your toddler didn't get any washing powder in her mouth, otherwise you could have had a far worse outcome than just a faulty washing machine.

[Idontgiveagriffindamn]

You’ve offered to pay so don’t know what more you can do but yes you’re at fault.
You failed to supervise your toddler who has run riot in his house - messed with the washing machine and probably peeled paint off a door (it doesn’t matter if it was already coming off). You’ve no idea what your child did as they were unsupervised.
I’m massively concerned that they sprinkled washing powder into the washing machine. That’s really dangerous - what if they had eaten some of it?

[Mamette]

I would start disentangling myself from this person at this point.

[Sirzy]

Lesson learnt, don’t leave you children unsupervised in someone else’s home and don’t expect a poorly child to babysit

[Datingandnoideahowto]

I don’t understand why you and your DC couldn’t go home after the op. Why did you need to stay?

[DeflatedGinDrinker]

Yabu op.

[JaffaRaf]

He’s got every right to be annoyed, you didn’t supervise your toddler and let her run riot, moving things around his house (in your words) and accessing potentially dangerous things. It’s annoying he won’t let you make amends, but it’s his right to just be annoyed for a while I guess.

[girlmom21]

How did your toddler reach washing powder and manage to put it in the washing machine? I have a really tall toddler who wouldn't be able to put powder in the correct part of a washing machine...

If you were only staying overnight with older DC, how did the toddler get there?

This timeline of events doesn't make sense.

[TwoLeftSocksWithHoles]

The only thing I can think of that could 'break' a washing machine like that is if the door catch is broken or twisted as there is switch to ensure a machine can't operate with the door open.
However it would be quite difficult to do unless your toddler has super strength. Do they?

[quizqueen]

I expect the controls have just been fiddled with. I couldn't use my oven the other day and then realised the child lock had been put on by my grandson fiddling. Why would he vacuum out the powder, I have no idea, just use it for washing! I would be cross though that your child hadn't been watched and a shoe had been put in the washing machine, unnoticed. How long was he away for, plants could last for two weeks?

[mumwon]

can you remember what type of washing machine it is & what model or get this info off of him
Than look it up online - as pp said child lock - or it could be the type where you can enter your own setting
My washing machine has loads of mysterious settings I never use - it could be the same for his

[enjoyingscience]

You can’t break a washing machine by putting a flip flop in and taking it out again and pressing the buttons. She clearly didn’t break it. YABU a bit to let her near the powder - that’s not safe. YANBU to think there’s something else going on with him, it sounds like he’s having an episode.

[Ihavehadenoughalready]

Whatever happened, however you want to minimize things, (Paint peeling away anyway? Seriously?)

You let a toddler run around unsupervised.

In someone else's house.

To the point that she was messing about in the laundry room and had access to soap and who knows what else.

Do you even know what else she touched or messed up?

Totally unreasonable.

Do you not understand how dangerous of a situation you put her in? Much less if she ruined someone else's things?

I'd be very angry too, even if the washer just needs to be unplugged and plugged back in to reset it, or whatever the problem is. Your child did something to it by touching the buttons. It is now in a state it was not in prior to you taking her there unsupervised.

And you're blaming your other child who was post-op, you're blaming the house owner for getting upset, you're blaming the situation you put yourself in.

Then you have the audacity to mock him for how he is dealing with a problem your toddler and YOU caused.

You are completely unreasonable. Except for offering to pay for repairs. That is obviously what you must do.

[Viviennemary]

Not surprised your friend was annoyed. Your negligence caused this. You need to offer to pay for a repair.

[SecretSpAD]

Of course you were unreasonable. Your child was left to run riot In someone else's house. Maybe broke something and you are blaming the house owner and your elder child rather than take responsibility for your fuck up.

[MolG5276bvfg]

It’s probably the kiddy lock. I accidentally lock mine just by walking past it. No idea how. Now have how to unlock it on a post it note in the cupboard above.

[FamishedAtAnAirport]

Were there any thunderstorms while they were away?

I recently had a similar thing after a thunderstorm, the machine did nothing. Then the day before someone was supposed to come look at it, I tried it again and it suddenly sprang into life.

I don't know for sure it was the thunderstorm (although it's likely), but I do know it had nothing to do with a toddler or a flip flop.

[Sirzy]

@FamishedAtAnAirport

Were there any thunderstorms while they were away?

I recently had a similar thing after a thunderstorm, the machine did nothing. Then the day before someone was supposed to come look at it, I tried it again and it suddenly sprang into life.

I don't know for sure it was the thunderstorm (although it's likely), but I do know it had nothing to do with a toddler or a flip flop.

How do you know? No adults have the faintest idea what the child did

[grapewine]

@SeasonFinale

Sorry - you stayed in his house? And you admit to using the machine? Why if staying one night ? You admit your toddler pretty much ran amok. Of course YABU and even more so to try to say he is in an alcoholic state when you simply have no idea if this is true.

This. I'd be pissed off in his place. Does he know you slept there?

[EmoIsntDead]

You let your toddler run around in someone else’s house totally unsupervised? Of course YABU and a CF to boot!

[JellyJellyTooToo]

As I said, I was unaware she was running riot and not being properly supervised. Was in the garden watering the plants at the time and in hindsight should have locked her in the garden with me. Older dc is a teen but yeah I shouldn’t have assumed little one was safe at the time and was mortified when I saw the washing powder. She’d only just sprinkled a small amount so I don’t think she’d even had time to touch the buttons etc