To think some are confusing 'calling out' with just disagreeing with someone?

[LordOfTheThings]

All this 'calling out' all over the bloody place.

A friend posted something innocuous (and in a pretty light-hearted way) on their social media yesterday. One of their friends disagreed with them to which my friend responded with a 'ah well we can agree to disagree' kind of post. The friend replied with a 'like most people you just don't like being called out when you're wrong' etc.

Now, not to be confused with telling someone that they're an arsehole (or even just politely explaining something to them) for saying something racist/sexist/any kind of ist really, surely were not at a stage that you can't have an opinion, in this case about a television programme, without this ridiculous 'calling out' nonsense? It seems that every so often there's a new 'phrase' that eventually starts being used in a completely different way from how it started off that makes sense i.e. virtue signalling etc?

Am I the only one who just finds this so tiresome and that people can fuck off with their 'calling out' of the most ludicrous things?

I was 'called out' just the other day at work.

During a Zoom whatsit, I called my mate a 'geek' and someone genuinely said that my language should be called out.

🤷🏻‍♀️

And my friend is a geek, though - he'd tell you that himself!

@TheCountessofFitzdotterel

I hate the assumption of moral authority by people who use it.

Gosh youve really nailed it with that comment haven’t you? It’s the Morality Police with history on their side. Scary.

@Ameanstreakamilewide

I was 'called out' just the other day at work.

During a Zoom whatsit, I called my mate a 'geek' and someone genuinely said that my language should be called out.

🤷🏻‍♀️

And my friend is a geek, though - he'd tell you that himself!

Tell me what’s wrong with geek? I need to add it to my compendium of unacceptable words.

Lord knows, Britney. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Nobody else mentioned it in the comments, which were being posted very quickly, so the daft comment got buried with other things.

YANBU. I hate with a burning passion the phrase "calling out".

@HugeAckmansWife

I think it's all related to the cancel culture, safe space thing too.. If someone holds a different view they are not only wrong, they are offensive / excluding / inciting hate / discrimating etc. The idea that academics are disinvited from addressing a university lecture or debate chamber because they might say something that not everyone agrees with or is a part of is v worrying.

Beautifully put.

@Ameanstreakamilewide

Lord knows, Britney. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Nobody else mentioned it in the comments, which were being posted very quickly, so the daft comment got buried with other things.

Well I’m intrigued. Did no one enquire further? I always thought geek was an admirable quality but I guess for others it’s seen as negative.

I miss a good reasoned and robust debate. I don't force my viewpoint on others and listen to the other side, and I like being challenged on my opinions because nothing is set in stone. With an ex-friend (for different reasons) we could spend hours having a good natured debate about our opposing political views. Somehow we managed to never descend into shit slinging or name calling

With certain types I just get called argumentative though or my pet hate of a word 'confrontational'

I can't stand "calling out" or "called out" and mostly ignore anyone who is stupid enough to use it.

"It seems that every so often there's a new 'phrase' that eventually starts being used in a completely different way from how it started off that makes sense i.e. virtue signalling etc?"

^^ Agreed, see "Karen"

It’s usually the leftie work brigade or those inspired the leftie woke brigade that get all excited on being right about everything. Calling out is often a lighter version of being cancelled. Because having a different opinion to the woke ones is no longer allowed. They will exercise their power by calling you racist, a bigot, transphobe or some other name just for having a harmless opinion. It is a new form of censorship and intimidation.

It was during a work Soapbox thing and there's the option for individuals to share their experiences about whatever's on their mind, sorta thing.

And the speaker on this occasion was a colleague had been through an awful lot with poor mental health, bless him. It was difficult to listen to at points.

So, people were posting supportive comments to our colleague and the geek debacle (as we already now call it) was quickly swept aside.

@Sparklfairy

The problem is people can't just disagree or even debate anymore. Its all about shutting the conversation down with "you're wrong and that's that", possibly with some current buzz words like woke or bigot thrown in for good measure.

Yes, this. I find it so tiring these days when people are incapable of having a debate without resorting to personal attacks, threats and accusations. It’s why I never ever discuss feminism on social media.

With certain types I just get called argumentative though or my pet hate of a word 'confrontational'

"Confront" is used a lot on mn, as in "my neighbour's dog barks should I confront them? Or put a note through their door?"

Why not just talk to them about it?

I loathe the ridiculous, sanctimonious 'calling out.' Bringing something to someone's attention or pointing out they're being an arse is so much better.

The problem is people can't just disagree or even debate anymore.

And no critical thinking. And can't separate statistically evidence from anecdotal evidence.

People also conflate facts & opinion.

On one thread about Trump I said something like "we can't be sure he won't win as he's very popular in certain states". Another poster took offence because he's horrible & shouldn't be popular. When I tried to make the point that Yes he's horrible but that doesn't mean he's not popular in some parts I was a MAGA bot!

I miss a good reasoned and robust debate

It's great for learning & seeing other sides & often my views have changed.

I don't like the phrase.

I think there is a difference between calling out unacceptable views or behaviour and juat disagreeing. But obviously moa people who have unacceptable views are going to think they're right and it's just their opinion.

As an example the fat phobia and hatred towards fat people on here. Do I'd say if I challenge those views it's calling out fat phobia but obviously the fat phobes think it's just their view and people are entitled to an opinion.

So it's a fine line and I'm not sure where it stops. But there are probably a myriad of this which definitely fall into the opinion category and calling our doesn't apply.

@sst1234

It’s usually the leftie work brigade or those inspired the leftie woke brigade that get all excited on being right about everything. Calling out is often a lighter version of being cancelled. Because having a different opinion to the woke ones is no longer allowed. They will exercise their power by calling you racist, a bigot, transphobe or some other name just for having a harmless opinion. It is a new form of censorship and intimidation.

See tbh anyone who uses the phrase lefties woke brigade just sounds like a massive right wing bigot. Whether you actually are or not. So perhaps if you don't want to be called out you could start with not sounding like a massive bigot.

leftie work brigade or those inspired the leftie woke brigade that get all excited on being right about everything

Thus perfectly illustrating my point.

@Ameanstreakamilewide I'm a little gobsmacked at anyone even thinking that the term 'geek' was even a thing!

I have just had the most wonderful class last year which had a handful of students who would say something like 'I would like to challenge xxx's point about Romeo' and proceed to give their pov. It was bloody brilliant. Over the course of the year, some of the more 'vocal' students learned to pipe down a bit and discuss rather than shout over everyone else. I loved them and I'll so miss them.

So I am not alone with hating the phrase “calling out”? It just sounds so juvenile. It gives me a mental picture of children in a playground and threatening to “tell on” someone.

And don’t get me started on “gaslighting”. Probably the most misused word on these boards. Someone telling you that you’ve gained weight is not gaslighting. Someone telling you they don’t like your new hairstyle is not gaslighting.

[quote LordOfTheThings]@Ameanstreakamilewide I'm a little gobsmacked at anyone even thinking that the term 'geek' was even a thing!

I have just had the most wonderful class last year which had a handful of students who would say something like 'I would like to challenge xxx's point about Romeo' and proceed to give their pov. It was bloody brilliant. Over the course of the year, some of the more 'vocal' students learned to pipe down a bit and discuss rather than shout over everyone else. I loved them and I'll so miss them.[/quote]
You're not alone with that response, my friend!

Everyone i've told has pretty much had the same reaction.

Doesn't it derive from duelling, and should be accompanied by a glove slap to the face and pistols at dawn?

@Neondisco

I don't like the phrase.

I think there is a difference between calling out unacceptable views or behaviour and juat disagreeing. But obviously moa people who have unacceptable views are going to think they're right and it's just their opinion.

As an example the fat phobia and hatred towards fat people on here. Do I'd say if I challenge those views it's calling out fat phobia but obviously the fat phobes think it's just their view and people are entitled to an opinion.

So it's a fine line and I'm not sure where it stops. But there are probably a myriad of this which definitely fall into the opinion category and calling our doesn't apply.

Again here, strange use of language. WTF is fat phobia? Are you suggesting people are scared of fat? Scared of fat people? It’s meaningless. Just because you put two words together that doesn’t make it a meaningful phrase.

Behaviours can be ‘called out’.
Not sure opinions (in respect to the OP) should be.