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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Was I in the wrong?

45 replies

Bighousebustup · 27/07/2021 20:00

Today we visited a big stately home with gardens and things. We decided to go into the house and there was a man there explaining rules to people so maybe a few minutes between each entry. There was my family and a lady with her kids.

She walked up just before us so we held back to go in after her. Her phone rang so she told her kids to go play on the grass opposite and left the queue area and went down some steps on the gravel path. Not long after, whilst her kids were playing and she was still on the phone the guy called us forward. I looked at my husband and said maybe we should wait and he said she’s not here so let’s just go. There was no one behind us at this point so no queue as such.

Whilst he is telling us the rules of the house she suddenly shouts down the phone that she has to go as someone has jumped her space in the queue. By the time my husband and kids have gone in she’s in the doorway shouting to her kids to get in the queue and that rude people had pushed in and she hopes they would never grow up to be so rude and we were horrible people.

I turned to apologise and said I didn’t realise at that point that she was wanting to go in yet seeing as she sent her kids off to play and was on the phone. She started shouting at me saying of course I knew she was as she was there and we had seen her. I tried to explain that yes I did but as she walked away to talk on the phone I assumed she wasn’t ready to go in. After shouting at me some more I just apologised again and walked in. Everyone turned to look at me because they obviously all heard me getting shouted at and I couldn’t control my tears, my 5 year old looked really sad bless her. I felt so embarrassed as I’m not a rude person at all.

So was I in the wrong? I could have just stood and waited but I genuinely didn’t think she was ready to go in. I could have shouted down to her or walked up to her to interrupt her call to tell her she could go in I guess. Everytime I seen her for the rest of the day I felt like crap as she kept giving me looks and telling a friend ‘she’s over there’ and things, I felt really uncomfortable.

I’ve attached a terrible drawing to try and explain where we were

Was I in the wrong?
OP posts:
Starjammer · 27/07/2021 20:03

She sounds like a knob. I don't think you did anything wrong. She bogged off out the queue and obviously wasn't ready to go in when her time came. Tough shit.

Finfintytint · 27/07/2021 20:03

The guy called you forward. She was being a twat. Don’t give it another thought.

LibertyFLiberty · 27/07/2021 20:04

She left the queue to take a phone call- she's the rude one.
She could've communicated to you that she'd be back.

user1473878824 · 27/07/2021 20:04

She’s a dick don’t waste any time thinking about it.

Notimeforaname · 27/07/2021 20:05

Nope. You were not wrong. She was an entitled bitch. And she was rude. You waited in the queue,she didn't. Simple.

Terminallysleepdeprived · 27/07/2021 20:05

She was a twat, you did nothing wrong. She left the queue end of

Iloveacurry · 27/07/2021 20:06

You didn’t do anything wrong. She went off to take a call, how do you know how long she was going to be? Besides, the guide at house asked you to go in. She was being a silly cow.

DrunkenKoala · 27/07/2021 20:06

She left the queue.

breakfasty · 27/07/2021 20:06

Oh how horrible! You did nothing wrong. These things happen and she should have been more forgiving.

Notimeforaname · 27/07/2021 20:06

Yes do try to put it to the back of your mind now that you know you didn't do anything.

I hate when embarrassing moments keep replaying,especially fresh ones. But in this instance,there is no place for your embarrassment.

That was on herWink

hidethexylophone · 27/07/2021 20:06

She was an idiot. It's like the big queue jumping signs at Alton towers - one of the definitions of queue jumping is leaving the queue and then trying to renter it at the same point, which is basically what she did,

breakfasty · 27/07/2021 20:08

I would have felt exactly the same as you but you have nothing to be embarrassed about. She might be thinking back today embarrassed about how much she lost it.

Moonface123 · 27/07/2021 20:08

She was definitely in the wrong.

roses2 · 27/07/2021 20:09

She left the queue. In the supermarket if someone leaves the queue they normally say "I forgot the carrots, back in a minute" so you know they're coming back. She didn't say anything so how were you to know.

Carrott21 · 27/07/2021 20:09

Don't apologise to rude people.

burritofan · 27/07/2021 20:09

She was a bellend.

AlmostSummer21 · 27/07/2021 20:11

She left the queue & sent her kids to play. She chose to take the phone call & go outside

She was bloody rude

You were a bit daft not to have told her that!

LagneyandCasey · 27/07/2021 20:12

Unless she said 'Can you save my place' or 'I'll be two minutes' she officially left the queue.

She's a nasty bitch. Sorry she did that to you, op Flowers

Notaroadrunner · 27/07/2021 20:13

YABU for apologising to the bitch! Curious to know what your Dh said to her? Did she shout at him too? Did the staff member not intervene to say you and your family were indeed next in the queue seeing as she left the queue?

WhenISnappedAndFarted · 27/07/2021 20:13

She was being a twat, she left the queue. I would have done the same thing as you except for apologising.

AnnaSW1 · 27/07/2021 20:14

She's just one of those people who lives her life looking for confrontation. She can't be very happy with her life if she chooses to live her life like that. It's not about you, I'd forget it.

Tal45 · 27/07/2021 20:14

I think it's fine that you apologised, it made it clear you were a polite person even though she was in the wrong. When she then went off on one then it was time to stop apologising and walk away as she was just being a twat.

Spanglebangle · 27/07/2021 20:14

Obviously she was wrong. But if you don't want your children to grow up thinking she was right you need to grow a back bone.

Tell her she was wrong, why she was wrong then tell her to get out of the way.

Standing there crying like a child makes it seem like you have been naughty and is confusing to your children.

daisypond · 27/07/2021 20:15

You did nothing wrong. I’m sorry she spoilt your day out.

LawnFever · 27/07/2021 20:15

She was a bloody idiot, she left the queue - you can’t walk off to talk on your phone and expect to keep your place!

You did nothing wrong, hope it didn’t ruin your day