Termination. Need a handhold.

[Dandy0911]

TW: termination

Didn't know what title to put this under so put under AIBU for traffic. Sorry if it's in the wrong place.

I'm having a termination next week due to medical reasons on my part. My old thread is below to read if anybody wants to.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/4301699-am-i-going-mad-can-anybody-see-lines-on-these

I can't stop crying. I'm heartbroken. I have such an emotional attachment to this little being already. It's not a bunch of cells to me, it's my baby and I just can't stop crying. How am I going to be able to take those pills next week.

I'm broken and could do with a little hand hold.

Thank you everyone :(

(Posted too early)

Aside from the practicalities, do you have a bereavement midwife lined up? They are a god-send and most trusts have at least one.

Hi. This from nhs website
www.nhs.uk/conditions/contraception/female-sterilisation/
I'm not sure if there is such a thing as non surgical sterilisation for women.

@Tinitiny
@ThreeLocusts

Thank you both for the advice! That's really good to know. I'll have a look into this in the morning.

Thank you 🥰

I understand your decision OP

Sending love from here too x

massive hug and handhold x

Keep posting OP and we’ll keep supporting.
Im so sorry

I'm so sorry OP, what an awful, horrendous situation you find yourself in. I'm hope you're surrounded by wonderfully supportive family and medical team as you go through this

I am so sorry that you abs your dh are going through this op. What an incredible team you two make. Sending you both strength

Sending lots of love, OP. It’s heartbreaking reading everything you’ve endured the last few years and I’m so sorry you’re in this situation now. Please post here whenever you need to. Best wishes to both you and your DH xx

So sorry you are going through this @Dandy0911 sending a virtual hug and support 🌷 look after yourself.

Sending love and a hand hold OP. What a heartbreaking situation . You will get through this especially with DH being so supportive as you describe. You are doing what's needed for your precious DD, it's totally out of your hands - don't forget that.

You sound so brave, you’ve been through so much already and you know you are making the right decision for your family no matter how hard it is for you xoxo

Sending you both hugs and wishes for a speedy recovery

Oh OP what a lot you've been through.
Perhaps it would be helpful to try (as best you can) not to picture your bean as a full term baby or potential sibling.
With everything you've described - and normal pregnancy risks - the chances of you reaching full term must be incredibly low.
You sound incredible but are beating yourself up as you've framed this as protecting your body (a totally sensible decision) but it's more than that. You couldn't willingly risk the life of those cells as they grow, the risks of severe complications and the responsibility that would place on your other daughter.
I hope you can find peace with this and enjoy the family you do have.
Once it is done you can begin to move on and grieve. This period of limbo must be unbearable

Aww bless you OP, how heartbreaking. You're are doing the right thing though. Just wanted to offer a hand hold and I think you're being incredibly brave

You poor poor thing OP.

I can’t offer anything more useful than my love xxx

This is desperately sad. What a situation to be in! You're honestly being the best mum and dad in the world right now, because you're making sure that you are present and healthy for the child you already have with you. The way I'm reading it, a pregnancy would likely cause massive damage to you, and both you and the baby could die from these complications. As much as you love the beautiful image of a second child, the reality is too dangerous and you have chosen to put your daughter and your life first. That's the right thing to do, as much as your poor heart must be breaking. After all you've been through, it's really cruel that you have to make such a decision. I'm so sorry.

Sending a handhold here. You've been through so much already, I'm so in awe of everything you've had to deal with.

Can I just say ‘FFS’. As if you haven’t had enough blows with dealing with cancer and a difficult pregnancy, you’re now facing this.

Have a massive hand hold, and lots of love xxx

Bless you both. So very, very sorry ❤️

Thank you everyone. Going to spend the weekend together just doing family bits.
Housework can wait.

Today we're going to Costco to get some lovely treats for a movie night tonight.
Then we're going to Smyths toy shop to get some new toys for DD. (9 months going on 19)🤣

Trying to just take each day as it comes whilst we're stuck in limbo. We are so grateful for the support x

Just checking in.
Hope you’re all doing as ok as you can @Dandy0911 x

Thinking of you x

@Tinitiny
@mummytoone28

Thank you for thinking of me. ❤️

I'm okay. I had a scan on Monday which marked me 5 weeks 2 days. I asked for a scan as I was cramping quite badly and bleeding.

Ive unfortunately miscarried the pregnancy. Which I think is a little kinder on me as I didn't need to go ahead with the termination. But it still really hurts.

So I've spent the week watching Netflix cuddling DD. Just what the doctor ordered (literally!)

It's been tough, painful and emotional. But we can start to move on now.

Thank you so so much for all of your support it's meant so much to me x