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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Annoyed with school

145 replies

HelpMeToHelpDD · 22/07/2021 10:11

DD is 7, just finished year 2.

They finished for summer on Friday. DD has some medical needs which means medications are kept at school (think inhalers and pain killers plus epipens and similar – DD has severe asthma triggered by both hayfever and hot weather and also triggered by the cold weather. She’s also got an insect allergy that causes antiphalictic shock. There’s also a painful condition which school give pain relief for)

The medicines have not come home. According to DD they were in the side pouch of her bag at afternoon playtime but when I picked her up there weren’t there. I can only assume as DD keeps her water bottle in her other side pouch she’s pulled the stuff out, realised it’s not her bottle and without thinking put it down.

Without them she cannot go to holiday club. Usually I take the ones from school to holiday club then replace everything right before she goes back to school.

She’s been off holiday club this week due to not having the stuff. Next week I have a big meeting I need her in holiday club for as it’s all day and a train ride away.

DD has some SN, and in previous years they’ve either got me to pick the stuff up from the school office or handed it to me as I walk through the gates. Apparently Year 2 and up they don’t do this but with her SN I thought they’d treat her as if she was a younger child – I am assuming she put the stuff in her pouch not realising what it is, I generally don’t carry the pain relief around with me for obvious reasons so she’s probably not even recognised that.

Apparently DD is not the only child in the class to come out without her medicine. I emailed school as soon as we got in before the gates are apparently shut for pickup for the older children (Ys3-6) but got the out of office response. I then called but got a phone message saying the office is closed until September – usually the secretary works until 4.30pm and responds to message and phonecalls until about 5 minutes before that time.

I’ve called the GP to get an emergency reissue but not having much luck actually getting hold of the medicine, remembering I’d usually ask for the reissue as a general prescription so they have 6-8 weeks to source things and there’s always a few weeks leeway with her previous ones if they can’t before school starts.

I have the pain relief as it’s over the counter, and I have the physical epipens and inhalers but I’ve removed them from boxes and thrown boxes away for storage at home so I can’t even send those into holiday club and ask for them back everyday. The home ones go between here and ExHs house so not even a spare supply anywhere.

AIBU to be annoyed with school? And AIBU to ask how on earth I can get her into holiday club next week?

I’m a single parent and if I lose my job because of this then DD will be unable to continue her extra curricular activities that keep her so well and help not just her SN but her medical issues too.

Please help.

Will add here school are generally great and manage DD with her issues well. I've never had direct contact details for her teacher or I'd have emailed her instead.

OP posts:
TwoLeftElbows · 22/07/2021 11:29

Email HT and deputy. SLT tend to check their messages.

I appreciate it's a pain but it doesn't sound like a failure on their part. SN or not, occasionally things go by the wayside in trying to get a hundred children and all their stuff out of the building simultaneously.

MildredPuppy · 22/07/2021 11:34

It is annoying.

If you cant get hold of the school are there any charities for your childs SN? The national autistic society wrote to our gp to ask for help getting medicines quickly so he could acess respite and it did help.

UneFoisAuChalet · 22/07/2021 11:34

Forget getting the meds from school OP.

Even if you got hold of the caretaker, they would need to confirm your identity via head teacher or the likes (who may or may not check their emails as promptly as you would like). The caretaker cannot let someone in looking for meds nor can they find meds and hand them over to you. So I’d forget this complicated solution to your problems and concentrate on getting new meds ASAP.

Address the issue in September and ensure this doesn’t happen again.

ballsdeep · 22/07/2021 11:37

If they were that critical you should have checked.

They were out into her bag. She lost it.

None of this is the schools fault.

User5827372728 · 22/07/2021 11:38

Surely if allergies are that bad she should have at least 2 of everything.

Our kids have 2 at school and 2 at home. They don’t move back and forth between the 2 places.

JustLyra · 22/07/2021 11:38

You really need to email the HT and let them know that the medications are lost and could potentially have been picked up by another child.

BlackeyedSusan · 22/07/2021 11:50

You should be able to get epipens really quickly from drs/pharmacy. DD lost her meds in school. She has left them at home and I have been let into school to deliver them. No-one is allowed in school usually.

I stood outside my daughter's secondary school on the last day to catch her and send her back in for meds. This is probably something you are going to have to do for another decade. Yes it's really shit.

So sorry you have found out the hard way how easy it is to lose them.

BlackeyedSusan · 22/07/2021 11:52

I don't keep epipens in a box. When you need them, you need them NOW. I label the plastic tube and the pen.

CoronaPeroni · 22/07/2021 11:57

Am surprised the school hand pupils their medication, these should be delivered via an adult both ways. As soon as you realised why didn't you return to school? If you'd have got through on the phone you would have had to go back there any way to pick them up. I would explain the situation and beg the GP for replacements.

EvilEdna1 · 22/07/2021 11:59

This is a really odd practice by the school. I work in a school and we won't hand medications to anyone but a parent or carer because of this sort of situation plus the meds getting into the hands of another child. The DoE guidelines also say meds should be signed in and out of the school by a parent.

Hankunamatata · 22/07/2021 12:00

Nope you have no right to be angry at the school. If they put them in her bag and dc took them out that's not their fault.

You should have checked at pickup

Hankunamatata · 22/07/2021 12:02

I always keep a full labeled extra supply as stiff at school gets broken or stops working.

Best bet is to ring round all the local pharmacies or try online pharmacy. Some independents may have greater success sourcing items

Soontobe60 · 22/07/2021 12:05

At my school the parent has to come to the office to collect the meds.
As a parent of a child with such a complex medical need, I’m wry surprised you didn’t check her bag. After all, such a large amount of meds must be quite sizeable,
YABVVVVU

fourandnomore · 22/07/2021 12:06

Go to your pharmacy and explain what you’ve written here, they’ll do an emergency prescription surely. Perhaps you should make sure you then replace the school supply and have three on the go - your house, other house, school. You cannot blame the school for this I don’t think.

Puffalicious · 22/07/2021 12:07

I don't know why you can't ring the GP and get another set? My DS is on many, many meds, most are quite unusual. The pharmacy usually only need 24 hours to order and receive even the unusual ones. Even then, if I'm having supply issues I call his specialist nurse and they're ordered and waiting at the hospital pharmacy by the next day. They will also deliver if it's an emergency. You do have options, just speak to people- GP/ Pharmacy/ Hosp. I don't get the massive issue.

Polmuggle · 22/07/2021 12:08

Has anyone actually read the OP?

It's absolutely the fault of the school. No 7yo should be handed painkillers to carry around unsupervised, and a 7yo with SEN should not be responsible for getting a back of medication back home.

WombatChocolate · 22/07/2021 12:09

You simply need to get hold of the stuff now.

Write another email saying how important it is that you get access to the stuff before the weekend. Send it to every email address/individual you have for school and include your phone number and point out that you can arrange to go to school to collect it at any point.

There will be people checking emails, even if you get the out of office message. They will respond to something important.

Regarding fault….well, if your DD says it was in the side pocket of her bag, presumably she was given it, told what it was and to give it to you. It sounds like she had clear instructions about it and someone put it in her bag. Quite where it went after that is anyone’s guess, but there are limits to what you can expect school to do. I agree, that this is one of those things that you as parent need to check you have before leaving the premises every half term. Better still, you need another set that you keep at home so the school set can remain there.

Just focus now on arranging to collect the stuff rather than blame. However, you also need to recognise that when children have some extra needs, you as parent also will need to be extra vigilant and follow things up and take extra steps yourself to ensure everything is sorted out. That’s just how it is.

TheUndoingProject · 22/07/2021 12:12

If your job is at risk over this I think you need to focus on fixing the problem ASAP, not allocating blame. I think you’re much more likely to have success with the GP/pharmacy rather than the school. The medicines don’t sound obscure enough to be difficult to get replacements of in a week?

My husband’s type 1 diabetic so has had to sort out urgent replacement medications abroad and all sorts.

Just10moreminutesplease · 22/07/2021 12:13

Having young children look after their own medicine is a disaster waiting to happen. If this is school policy, not your personal choice, I don’t think YABU to be annoyed.

If there is no way to get these medicines back from the school, I think your only option is to push for your GP to reissue them quickly.

Fingers crossed that you get them in time for your meeting.

m0therofdragons · 22/07/2021 12:13

How does she not have home supplies she can take and bring home daily? And surely you can just order a repeat prescription? Pharmacy can do emergency supplies too so speak to a pharmacist.

School gave dc meds, you expected them to be in her bag rather than ask to collect from the office due to sen and now you’re blaming the school even though they put them in her bag? If she lost them then the school won’t be able to magically find them?

WombatChocolate · 22/07/2021 12:14

And I also wonder about exactly what did happen….it doesn’t fully add up as a story.

Your DD mentions the stuff was in her bag. What detail about who put it there or when or any instructions she was given? Is what she says reliable? What exactly does she say about when and where it wasn’t there? I suspect something isn’t fully accurate in the story, but the school should be able to clarify about what happened/didn’t happen. Usually schools won’t give the medication to small children to look after for a whole afternoon in school….so it doesn’t sound like that’s what will have happened by something else.

Keep leaving phone messages and as I said email all school email addresses/people (look at website and previous school newsletters/letters to find them) and at the same time look into getting a replacement set from the doctor/pharmacist….clearly you need another set anyway tos top this happening again…..relying on just one set was bound to lead to this kind of issue at some point.

rosalindwi · 22/07/2021 12:15

Email the class teacher direct. If this was a child in my class (I am a year 2 teacher) I would reply straight away and go into school to get them.

JustLyra · 22/07/2021 12:17

I'm assuming from the OP saying "I’ve called the GP to get an emergency reissue but not having much luck actually getting hold of the medicine" there's a shortage of the actual medication.

Is it the epipens that you're not able to get a hold of @HelpMeToHelpDD?

We had to do a ring round recently to get DD's new ones and it took calling a pharmacy chain who were able to look up which branches had stock to get a hold of them.

AnotherDayAnotherCake · 22/07/2021 12:17

Go back to the GP for more medication. It should take 48 hours max for prescription and then call around local pharmacies to see where has the items in stock.
Don’t understand the 6-8 week comment.

JustLyra · 22/07/2021 12:18

@m0therofdragons

How does she not have home supplies she can take and bring home daily? And surely you can just order a repeat prescription? Pharmacy can do emergency supplies too so speak to a pharmacist.

School gave dc meds, you expected them to be in her bag rather than ask to collect from the office due to sen and now you’re blaming the school even though they put them in her bag? If she lost them then the school won’t be able to magically find them?

She does have a set at home. The summer school, like the school, want a fully boxed and labelled set.