Am I being unreasonable... to think life insurance might be pointless?

[WOBNIARM]

My partner suffers from mental health difficulties (exhibiting symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder and multiple personality disorder [now called dissociative identity disorder]) and physical health difficulties where they require the support of a wheelchair.
Unfortunately, despite repeatedly trying to get any diagnosis for the last three years my partner is without a diagnosis for any of these health problems as of yet, so I have to be there supporting them every step of the way.
Even though we are both unemployed, I have no issue supporting my partner with their difficulties with our joined Universal Credit income but recently I noticed within the banking app on my phone there is a new option for life insurance.

I'd just like to put a disclaimer here, I have no intention of killing off my partner.

So I looked into the life insurance just to get a bit of an understanding and this is what I found.

1. Guaranteed 60+ Life Insurance = No good to me, I'm not 60+.
2. Life Insurance = Pays out if I die or am diagnosed as terminally ill.
3. Life Insurance + Cancer, Heart Attack & Stroke = Pays out same as life insurance, but includes if I am diagnosed with cancer, a heart attack or a stroke, even if I recover. Naturally my brain goes towards option 3, it seems like a better option if I were to get life insurance at all as that'd still allow me 3/4 chances to continue to support my partner.

Having said that, am I being unreasonable to think that it might be pointless to get life insurance on myself when my partner would be unable to look after herself if I died or unable to support me if I needed her to?

When my husband died I would have been fucked financial without our joint life insurance policy paying out. Not a massive sum but enough that means I can keep our house running without the need to downsize for a few years.
Everyone who can get it should have life insurance.

DH has terminal cancer and no life insurance/critical illness cover, it is a situation he very much regrets.

I only had life insurance when I had a mortgage. It was a requirement, and is sensible so as to avoid being widowed, with kids and unable to pay the mortgage, as benefits don’t cover that. I’m not sure whether it’s worth purchasing if you’re both on benefits and don’t have major financial commitments but I might be wrong!

Life insurance will enable your partner to pay for support. Not the same as having you there but better than no personal support and no money

We didn't get life insurance, we got critical illness cover instead as we felt we could only afford one. And anyway, I said, if DH died I would have to move home to my parents because I couldn't possibly cope etc etc. Well, he died, and it wasn't from something covered under our CI policy, and of course I didn't want to move home with my parents, so I was a bit fucked. I hugely regret not getting life insurance now.

It will be beneficial as it would allow your partner to be able to afford help/support if you were to pass away.

If you were to get option number 3, it would also allow you to pay for help for yourself if needed, as your partner would be unable to do so.

I've never had life insurance before but I'm 22 now and just had my first baby a couple of months ago so made sure to take it out so that if the worst happens my partner would have the money to be able to get help and give our son a good life

We have life insurance against our mortgage and my DH has critical illness too as he is the high earner - by miles!
I think everyone should have life insurance (if they can afford it) Your partner would be able to make use of the money in a positive way, like buying in extra help. Make sure you shop around for it, if you are seriously considering it though

@Proudboomer

When my husband died I would have been fucked financial without our joint life insurance policy paying out. Not a massive sum but enough that means I can keep our house running without the need to downsize for a few years. Everyone who can get it should have life insurance.

My condolences. I don't know if keeping the house running is relevant me and my partner as we privately rent, but we appreciate your response.

@bloodywhitecat

DH has terminal cancer and no life insurance/critical illness cover, it is a situation he very much regrets.

I can't even begin to imagine what that must be like, I'm sorry to hear that, your response is very much appreciated and if as with anyone who has commented here, if you ever need to talk, my messages are always available.

We have life insurance that would cover the mortgage, plus extra critical illness/life so keep us going for about 18 months without work. CI much more expensive so we didn't take more out. Now claiming on it as I have (very curable) cancer, very glad we have it. Get what you can afford, this insurance money coming is making life much more bearable right now.

@dangermouseisace

I only had life insurance when I had a mortgage. It was a requirement, and is sensible so as to avoid being widowed, with kids and unable to pay the mortgage, as benefits don’t cover that. I’m not sure whether it’s worth purchasing if you’re both on benefits and don’t have major financial commitments but I might be wrong!

Yeah, it can be hard to go from privately renting a property to getting a mortgage on a house when one of you grew up in foster care and the other one doesn't speak to their abusive family. We do appreciate your response though and if we're ever looking into purchasing a house and/or a mortgage, we will be sure to check back in with you.

@Defiantly41

Life insurance will enable your partner to pay for support. Not the same as having you there but better than no personal support and no money

We appreciate your response, but I think my biggest concern is that because of my partner's mental health difficulties, she doesn't understand things such as how to go about paying for support in that situation, even after it's been explained to her. In her mind she just thinks the government will automatically just cremate me free of charge. Might it be possible to get automated support from a local authority or something so that she can have someone else there to deal with this? I don't know if it's a thing that local authorities have the power to put in place.

@peachgreen

We didn't get life insurance, we got critical illness cover instead as we felt we could only afford one. And anyway, I said, if DH died I would have to move home to my parents because I couldn't possibly cope etc etc. Well, he died, and it wasn't from something covered under our CI policy, and of course I didn't want to move home with my parents, so I was a bit fucked. I hugely regret not getting life insurance now.

My condolences for your loss. It's clear the lesson to take from this is to get the right kind of cover/insurance to make sure that we're covered in as many circumstances as possible. Thank you for your response.

About 40% of people will be diagnosed with cancer, iirc. Get insurance.

@Lou98

It will be beneficial as it would allow your partner to be able to afford help/support if you were to pass away.

If you were to get option number 3, it would also allow you to pay for help for yourself if needed, as your partner would be unable to do so.

I've never had life insurance before but I'm 22 now and just had my first baby a couple of months ago so made sure to take it out so that if the worst happens my partner would have the money to be able to get help and give our son a good life

Thank you for your response. I feel that somehow I would need to get some kind of automated help/support as my partner's mental health difficulties prevent them from understanding what to do in that situation, even when it's been explained to them, if that were an option, it'd be very helpful, but I don't know if that's a thing. I agree with your verdict on the third option, like you say in the event that it was needed and I was able to, I could pay for my own support. I guess I'm just sort of like I know there's a 3/4 chance I wouldn't die, but that's still 1/4 chance of that situation happening and that's what's putting me off. Also, congratulations on your first baby!

@ILoveYouILoveYouIDo

We have life insurance against our mortgage and my DH has critical illness too as he is the high earner - by miles! I think everyone should have life insurance (if they can afford it) Your partner would be able to make use of the money in a positive way, like buying in extra help. Make sure you shop around for it, if you are seriously considering it though

Thank you for your response, every response on here is very helpful. I would hope that I could get an automated kind of support system in place should I pass. I don't know if that's a thing, but if it is then it would help my partner get the right support rather than my partner struggling not knowing what to do about it all.

I have life cover, it's term life and expires when my youngest is 28, we have actually divorced but kept the joint life cover as it protects us both financially if the other one dies (pays out on whoever dies first). It was very cheap because we were quite young when we took it out and didn't smoke

@sunflowerdaisies

We have life insurance that would cover the mortgage, plus extra critical illness/life so keep us going for about 18 months without work. CI much more expensive so we didn't take more out. Now claiming on it as I have (very curable) cancer, very glad we have it. Get what you can afford, this insurance money coming is making life much more bearable right now.

Thank you for your response. I'm sorry that you have cancer, but I am very glad to hear it's very curable. The risk of the cancer, heart attack or stroke is definitely a big reason of mine to think it's a good idea to get this life insurance with these beneficial options. I just wanted to get feedback because these things can be complicated when there's other circumstances and situations you have to consider. I hope you get cured soon.

@GingerBrod

About 40% of people will be diagnosed with cancer, iirc. Get insurance.

Thank you for your response. I didn't realise the percentage of people being diagnosed with cancer was that high, wow. That is definitely a big factor of mine for the insurance. Thank you for the information.

@gogohm

I have life cover, it's term life and expires when my youngest is 28, we have actually divorced but kept the joint life cover as it protects us both financially if the other one dies (pays out on whoever dies first). It was very cheap because we were quite young when we took it out and didn't smoke

Thank you for your response. I'm sorry to hear that you've divorced, but I'm glad to hear that you've seen the benefit of keeping the cover to support you both equally. That's very helpful information and it's definitely something that's going into consideration.

Unfortunately @WOBNIARM there's no automated support system, it's on evaluation of needs. You mentioned that one of your grew up in the care system, you might get good advice from charities that specialise in helping those in this situation. As to owning, ex foster kids do own houses, I know two ex banardos boys who are top professionals in their fields - nobody here should make assumptions about you either.

@gogohm

Unfortunately *@WOBNIARM* there's no automated support system, it's on evaluation of needs. You mentioned that one of your grew up in the care system, you might get good advice from charities that specialise in helping those in this situation. As to owning, ex foster kids do own houses, I know two ex banardos boys who are top professionals in their fields - nobody here should make assumptions about you either.

Thanks for your response. What a shame there's no automated support system. I myself grew up in foster care and please forgive me, while I'm not saying that ex-foster kids don't own houses, I personally have never been and don't personally see myself ever being in that situation where I can own a house. I should have been clearer on that, my apologies. Kudos to the ex-foster kids who do own houses and are top professionals in their fields. In my opinion that should be encouragement enough for anybody else right there. I think I will definitely look into what charities help people who might be struggling to get the right support in the potential situation, as I like to think that where there's a will, there's a way.

Have you made a will OP? I think that would be the place to try and put things in place to support your partner with decision making if you were you pass away. You can nominate an executor to manage your estate and potential look at putting life insurance money into a trust that someone else manages for you DP? That obviously depends on the extent of their mental health issues.

I’d say life insurance and critical illness cover are great to have if you can afford it. I don’t think the PP that mentioned mortgages meant to be rude though, the value of a life insurance policy is so often linked to the amount people borrow for a mortgage and it’s generally a requirement of taking out a mortgage so the two really are very closely linked. Most people set things up so the mortgage is fully paid off by the policy in the event of their death.

Without a mortgage you’ll have to think carefully about what you’d want the value of the policy to be and this will inform what you pay monthly.

I didn't understand life insurance either but my DH insisted we get it with our huge mortgage. So we did and forgot about it. He died 2 years ago and it means I have enough to give the kids a good start when they set up by themselves. Thinking about it, we only paid in for 10 years - you just never know what's round the corner.

If you are concerned about your partner’s ability to manage a large sum of money if you weren’t around, you can set up a specialist trust as part of your estate. Our son is disabled and this is what we’ve done so his benefits are less impacted and he won’t fall prey to opportunists. It cost some money in legal fees but was so worth it for peace of mind. Local mental health or disability advocacy groups should be able to give you more info about who to contact and how to do this. It’s worth investigating.