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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be sick of the neighbours looking into our garden?

253 replies

Wannakisstheteacher · 18/07/2021 20:49

Background: house is rented so fence cannot be changed.

We live in a semi. Garden fence between us is a chain link about waist high across 2/3 of the garden and a wooden 6ft fence for the other 1/3 closest to the house where the patios are. NDN have a table in the garden and eat there every night in the summer. AIBU to think it’s really fucking rude that they’ve pushed the table right up against the chain link part of the fence so they are sat there looking into our garden? Why would they not have their table on the patio where the wooden part is so we both have some privacy or at least not right up against the fence?!

It’s pathetic, I know. But I just hate going into the garden in the evening as they just sit there with their endless stream of guests, and watch everything we do. It’s just so awkward.

OP posts:
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6
WildSwimming101 · 18/07/2021 21:23

What kind of people are they?

Any chance you could just have a word with them?

Tell them you feel you are being watched and would appreciate some privacy?

Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 18/07/2021 21:24

@GreyhoundG1rl agreed.

OP posts:
CharlotteUnaNatalieThompson · 18/07/2021 21:25

I would hate this too.

I'd put up my own fence, just inside your boundary. It's none of their business what you do on your own property

gillysSong · 18/07/2021 21:27

Invite a smoker round.
Better still, buy some cannibis. Then, what you do witth it will determine how long it will bother you. Wink

Dohrehmee · 18/07/2021 21:27

Get a chair and sit down with a book and when they come out put your book down and watch them. If they are in the garden with people read your book. But then make it a point of being more interested in them then the book. Do it a good few times . If they watch take your washing down , then make it a pint of staring at them the way they do you. Sooner or later they will feel
Uncomfortable

Chloemol · 18/07/2021 21:27
  1. Get bamboo in pots
2 when you go out and they stop and stare, say something, I would along the lines of evening, how nice for you to rudely watch what i do in my own garden each evening, you must have sad lives.
  1. Every time they sit there go out, make as much noise as you can, water the flowers in the borders, stop and watch what they are doing,

Hopefully they then get the hint that both of you are entitled to use the garden but they are being inconsiderate as they could out the table on the patio

WildSwimming101 · 18/07/2021 21:28

Really your options are:

Moveable temporary screen

Chat with them about moving their table

Pull up a chair and join them.

AllTrolledOut · 18/07/2021 21:28

If you do get the Bamboo and pot them (I have seen Bamboo plants in B&M & Morrisons for £25)

I suggest you get wheels from Toolstation/Screwfix to put on the bottom of the planters, so it makes them easier to move in case they keep moving their table

PickAChew · 18/07/2021 21:31

@Wannakisstheteacher

We aren’t entertaining as we never go out there in the evening now! But they are currently sat there looking directly at my washing on the line. If I go out to collect it etc they stop talking and just watch me.
Well you need to buy some size 30 knickers, emblazoned with the letters c, f, f, f, k, o and u and arrange the on your washing line.
AGirlCalledJohnny · 18/07/2021 21:32

Putting the table against a chain link fence in a garden with plenty of room not to, is as obnoxious as it is bizarre. And would drive me doolally too. Take a picture and send it to your landlord, if he's that much of a pushover, maybe you need to push a little harder before you start spending your own money. Squeaky wheel and all that!

Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 18/07/2021 21:35

I think the pots and umbrella are my best option. I don’t feel I can ask them to move their table as it is in their garden and I’m a coward. Plus I just don’t think they would. They have chosen, to move it from the place designed for a garden set to the grass and right up against the fence. There is no reason it would need to be there other than them staking their claim to the entire garden or just to watch us.

OP posts:
TheChiefJo · 18/07/2021 21:36

Just put something up that isn't what the LL has proscribed. Planters, windbreak, whatever.

I wouldn't like the lack of privacy either, but the solution doesn't have to be a fence.

SmallPrawnEnergy · 18/07/2021 21:37

Have you spoken to them about how intrusive you feel it is and asked if it’s possibly move the table a bit so you don’t feel so watched?

SmallPrawnEnergy · 18/07/2021 21:38

Oh right, crossposted about asking. I think neighbourly relations are going to be soured if you’re not adult enough to approach them first. If they’re unhappy about a fence they’re going to have something to say about anything blocking them out so what will you say then?!

Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 18/07/2021 21:40

@SmallPrawnEnergy that the pot plants grew more than I expected!?

OP posts:
CharlotteUnaNatalieThompson · 18/07/2021 21:41

Why all these creative solutions? You can't make they landlord put up a fence. But no-one can stop you putting up your own fence literally just inside your boundary. You will lose no space at all...

SlothinSpirit · 18/07/2021 21:41

An extra high windbreak is your instant, cheap and cheerful solution.

Luckymummytoone · 18/07/2021 21:41

Our neighbours have done the same, I feel your pain! I’m going to have to invest in something to block them out 👀

godmum56 · 18/07/2021 21:41

@SmallPrawnEnergy

Oh right, crossposted about asking. I think neighbourly relations are going to be soured if you’re not adult enough to approach them first. If they’re unhappy about a fence they’re going to have something to say about anything blocking them out so what will you say then?!
"we thought you'd like your privacy" :)
jazzandh · 18/07/2021 21:42

Maggot infested wheelie bins will move them sharpish!!

Wolfiefan · 18/07/2021 21:42

Take your evening drinks into the garden. Sit at a table right by fence. Enjoy a detailed chat about your plans for the new sex swing in the garden. Topless.
They’ll move. Grin

Summerbreeze4 · 18/07/2021 21:44

Plant some laurels and just buy cheap fence. Who are your neighbours to say no their birder plants will die. You can do what you want in your house. You are renting you can do what you want within reason. Or why some free standing screens. I wouldn’t waste your time with the landlord again he seems nuts.

jazzandh · 18/07/2021 21:45

or go and clean said bins with jeyes fluid right by their table........

Summerbreeze4 · 18/07/2021 21:45

Do you have a dog or does a friend, a pile of manure right by their table might get them to move.

spinningspaniels · 18/07/2021 21:47

DD had exactly the same in her HA home. There was 3 panels by the patio but the rest was chain link both sides and she was being driven mad by the kids next door shouting every time she went outside.

She got some screening stuff from Amazon (privacy netting) that she put on with cable ties on her side of the fence. It was about £25 a roll for a 5 metre length and worth it's weight in gold. It's like a thick green sheet.