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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think that a child who has never been camping is not necessarily from a ‘deprived’ background

513 replies

Urbandweller · 16/07/2021 20:57

DD’s school organised a camping trip for Y5. DD is younger and didn’t attend but her class teacher went to chaperone. I was chatting with her about it today and she said she was so glad the school was able to organise the trip as so many of the Y5 kids had never been camping and would never otherwise get the chance to go. It was clear that she felt sorry for the children who hadn’t been before and was shaking her head sorrowfully, saying many of them are the same poor kids who have never been to the beach and this is one of the saddest aspects of deprivation...

AIBU to not see the link between camping and deprivation? We’ve never taken DD because it’s my idea of hell, nothing to do with lack of funds!

OP posts:
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flourescentstar · 18/07/2021 15:22

Hahahaa well if that's the case my dc who is a private school is severely deprived. I will never ever take her camping.

I felt deprived as a dc being taken camping. It was the most awful thing. We had to share the showers for a start, and carry our wash bags across a grotty muddy field . I'm sure things have changed but it's 5* hotels all the way in this household and if that means my dc is deprived than so be it.

GreyhoundG1rl · 18/07/2021 15:25

Why shoehorn in private school?

GreyhoundG1rl · 18/07/2021 15:26

And 5* hotels 😂

flourescentstar · 18/07/2021 15:31

Because it's so untrue about the no camping being a sign of deprivation. I haven't met any deprived dc at our school? Unless that's unusual for a private school.
I'm from a 'poor' background, no heating at home, no new clothes, blah blah, holidays involved camping so for me I relate that as a deprived childhood and the equivalent holiday,
Now I am not living in poverty, I have to have a nice clean hotel now and it's a sign of no deprivation for me to no longer having to go camping, each to their own though as this thread is clearly showing!

Oblomov21 · 18/07/2021 15:32

Did she mean poverty? Deprivation? Slightly different things.

A child not having been to the beach/seen the sea, seems sad.

Being young and sleeping for one night in a comfy tent, with all the right gear, isn't uncomfortable.

My two did it with the Cubs/scouts.

Many people haven't done many things. It is a bit odd. I'm always surprised by those Facebook lists of things you haven't done. I've done most of them! And things you won't eat. I eat nearly all of them.

To think that a child who has never been camping is not necessarily from a ‘deprived’ background
TwinsandTrifle · 18/07/2021 15:35

I actually (through history as qualified accountant) volunteer with a program who help single mothers starting their own businesses. I advise with financial aspects. There are various other women, one with a legal background for example, who advise too.

This is why I have quite a current knowledge of the system. DWP forward their UC information to the council, who then reduce their ctax accordingly. I don't really know what else to say? Here, as in England, it's done for you as part of the UC application. If their income increases (which they report each month via the UC portal) then the DWP forward that on, and their ctax is adjusted accordingly. They don't contact the council at all??

Wallpapering · 18/07/2021 15:59

Last worked for DWP June 2017

My case against DWP ended Jan 2019

Am sure your knowledge also knows that be not everyone on UC as some are still on old system the deadline to have everyone on UC has been constantly changed atm it’s still voluntary request those on old system to move over in some areas

HTH1 · 18/07/2021 16:32

😂 my DC (and I) have never been camping but I don’t think many would shake their head sadly if they knew what kind of holidays we go on instead...

SleepingStandingUp · 18/07/2021 20:39

@flourescentstar

Because it's so untrue about the no camping being a sign of deprivation. I haven't met any deprived dc at our school? Unless that's unusual for a private school. I'm from a 'poor' background, no heating at home, no new clothes, blah blah, holidays involved camping so for me I relate that as a deprived childhood and the equivalent holiday, Now I am not living in poverty, I have to have a nice clean hotel now and it's a sign of no deprivation for me to no longer having to go camping, each to their own though as this thread is clearly showing!
No one on the thread is saying that not going os a sign of deprivation. Its the not EVEN being able to do that. No EVEN affording to go camping.
tartanblanketdog · 18/07/2021 21:34

@flourescentstar

Because it's so untrue about the no camping being a sign of deprivation. I haven't met any deprived dc at our school? Unless that's unusual for a private school. I'm from a 'poor' background, no heating at home, no new clothes, blah blah, holidays involved camping so for me I relate that as a deprived childhood and the equivalent holiday, Now I am not living in poverty, I have to have a nice clean hotel now and it's a sign of no deprivation for me to no longer having to go camping, each to their own though as this thread is clearly showing!
Sure, not going camping is not a sign of deprivation, a missed experience maybe but you are missing a trick at thinking that privately educated kids cannot be deprived. Your experience limits your view of how it is defined. Knowing people who attended private boarding schools from the age of 5 - knowing people who's parents had no interest in parenting them but enough money to pay for other people to "care" for them - some of those people describe themselves of being deprived of love - not things - they got loads of things, too many things but it doesn't make up for a lack of love - that deprivation sits heavy and long and money can't relieve it..
flourescentstar · 18/07/2021 21:55

Don't be daft. Privately educated dc have all sorts of luxuries not afforded to non private schooled dc. My dc is at a boarding school! If a deprived dc went there (nowadays it's very rare for a primary aged dc to be sent without paying fees, hardly any I know have bursaries or scholarships for under 11s) they would most likely have the opportunity to do all of the activities mentioned but it's a choice. No one I know in my dc year has gone camping over the holidays though. Poor souls if they do.

Camping imo is not something most people would choose over a nice hotel or at least people that have experienced both. That for me is the link between camping and deprivation. My link anyway. My own experience and that of the people I know.
And to whoever said I got the wrong end of the stick and it's dc who can't even go camping, is this because they aren't signed up to any clubs, my parents loved shoving me of to Cub Scout camp for free every year. One of the benefits of being poor, show you're from a low income family and it's all for free! Maybe that doesn't happen anymore.

Either way I thank goodness I will never again know what it is to run across the grass after a cold rainy night in a tent Grin

WalkingOnTheCracks · 18/07/2021 21:56

EvenRosesHaveThorns
Woah, what's 'utterly miserable' about star gazing and campfires and marshmallows?

All the above.

GreyhoundG1rl · 18/07/2021 21:57

You sound insufferable, flourescentstar

Youdiditanyway · 18/07/2021 21:59

Camping isn’t exactly everyone’s idea of fun, is it? It’s an acquired taste so of course not every child will go camping and it has nothing to do with wealth.

My Mum loves holidays where she literally just sits by the pool like the cast of fucking Benidorm. Not my thing at all but she likes it so that’s what she chooses to do, she definitely wouldn’t go camping but she easily has the money for lots of holidays abroad!

Mylittlesandwich · 18/07/2021 22:08

I strongly dislike camping. If DS ever wants to go camping he can go with my mum. For some inexplicable reason she loves it.

We were poor(ish) growing up and we didn't have many holidays at all. We went camping once because we had an old tent but we quickly discovered it leaked and didn't use it again. We did a couple of caravan holidays and one trip to pontins in a chalet.

We aren't particularly well off now but with proper budgeting we can do a caravan holiday every year.

2orangey · 18/07/2021 22:20

When I worked with deprived kids it was upsetting the number of things they hadn't done. Never seen the sea. Never been to a National Park. Never been hiking. Never been on ANY kind of holiday. (Did you have a nice summer holiday? No miss I was bored stuck in my room for 6 weeks). Never been to a restaurant other than fast food places. Never been to the next town or the centre of a nearby city. Never been to a museum unless for a school trip. And so on.

You could say that most kids won't have done ALL of the things on this list due to family circumstances/ parental preference. And that's fine - they still have a rich and varied childhood. It's the ones who don't get to experience ANY of it that you could really say are deprived.

tartanblanketdog · 18/07/2021 23:49

@GreyhoundG1rl

You sound insufferable, flourescentstar
No she sounds like someone desperately trying to put her past to bed but overcompensating - I do the same with my religious upbringing - I wish I could dismiss it in a breezy way but my reaction is always too much.
VestaTilley · 18/07/2021 23:54

I expect she was talking in more general terms about children who don’t get taken anywhere or on any kind of holiday.

Obviously camping isn’t mandatory, but it’s a fun novelty for children and nice if they can go once at least while they’re little.

stayathomer · 18/07/2021 23:57

It is a bit odd. I'm always surprised by those Facebook lists of things you haven't done. I've done most of them! And things you won't eat. I eat nearly all of them.
They're usually linked though, aren't they? Say you don't like seafood, these lists will include about 15 types of seafood so you look fussy but most people don't regularly eat chowder, crab, mussels, prawns, lobster etc. Same with the what you've done ones- if you're eg not adventurous(or eg sporty or eg creative) you'll not have done half the list if it's that way inclined

Franticbutterfly · 19/07/2021 09:08

As a family we would hate camping. Where do you plug in your hairdryer??

rantymcrantface66 · 19/07/2021 11:03

@Franticbutterfly

As a family we would hate camping. Where do you plug in your hairdryer??
In your electric hook up cable 🙂
Original poster
Urbandweller · 19/07/2021 11:08

Well I’ve been now targeted with a camping ad for this wonderful tent…an absolute steal at £7,000Grin

To think that a child who has never been camping is not necessarily from a ‘deprived’ background
OP posts:
KittenKong · 19/07/2021 11:18

That’s a barn surely? I’d love one of those hit it won’t fit on my balcony!

Holly60 · 19/07/2021 11:25

But I can sort of see what she means. Lots of children go camping through scouts or guides etc, but this might not happen for more deprived children. And to be honest camping holidays are quite a middle class preoccupation in England. They require a bit of know- how, car ownership and the ability to afford the equipment, so I kind of understand her point…

Holly60 · 19/07/2021 11:26

@Franticbutterfly

As a family we would hate camping. Where do you plug in your hairdryer??
Many campsite shower facilities have hairdryers, or yes you plug them into your electrical hook-up, same as the fridge, electric air-bed pump, kettle, and phone chargers etc.
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