I am at a loss and would appreciate advice. Had a huge row with DS last night. He has always been a fairly easy kid although always been pretty lazy. He is now 17 and has started to get more difficult. He doesn’t have a lot of chores but I do expect him to keep his bedroom reasonable or not littered with dirty plates and cups, food wrappers etc and I expect him to put his dishes in the dishwasher. I came hone from work last night to dishes all over the side, kitchen worktops smeared with food and crumbs his belongings all over the place etc. I had to ask him 3 times to clear it up. I had asked him to empty the dishwasher whilst I was out at work but apparently it hadn’t washed so he just left it - he said he didn’t know how to turn it on! Anyway things escalated, he started just shouting over me, I asked him to stop doing that but he got really quite aggressive told me to fucking shut up he was sick of listening to me say the same things. I told him not to swear he called me childish they are just words he’ll used them if he wants, he called me a dick and a vile person because I’m always having a go at him etc etc. I tried to stay calm but I did tell him that he could use whatever language he wanted with his friends but I did not want him swearing in front of me and if he could t respect that he could find somewhere else to live as his behaviour was not acceptable. I also told him that from now on he could wash his own clothes, make his own meals, get himself up for work and get the bus because I wasn’t doing anything for him anymore, I had had enough. He just continued to shout at me so I went to bed. I’m not sure how best to handle this. I do end up nagging him because he doesn’t do a thing he is told and it drives me mad. I don’t see why I should have to come home from work to his mess. Any advice on what I do next would be appreciated