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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Car trouble

35 replies

Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 19:35

First World problems I know, but would like opinions on who is being U...

2 car household, one is my company car (Car A) and whilst the other is technically mine (V5C in my name, I pay for maintenance), this car, Car B, is at DH's unlimited disposal. DH WFH and will do until early 2022,he uses Car B for taking the DC to an activity one weekend day and random odd trips, covers less than 25 miles per week in average. I do the shopping and most of the DC drop offs and pick ups for childcare/school/medical appointments.
Car B is a non-premium brand batch but is pretty nippy, decent spec, fully maintained and absolutely fit for purpose.

DH has always been into his cars (think driving round Europe with friends, track days etc) and has now decided that Car B isn't good enough for him and "hates" driving it. He has taken out a significant loan and has booked a day off work to collect a car over 4 hours away, the day of which causes me some logistical issues with work, effectively doing 4 drop offs and pick ups and eldest DC might miss her after school activity which is pre paid and non refundable.

This car isn't super special BTW, I'd class it as a hot hatch.

AIBU to be extremely pissed off? Car B and the new car are going to remain on the driveway for the vast majority of the week and given I'm fairly new in my current job I'm wary of us taking on unnecessary extra debt whilst I'm on probation.
So as not to drip feed I'm also retraining in a subject where I'll be working on a self employed basis so am saving quite aggressively to leave the job sometime next year, DH is supportive of the retraining but this feels like a slap in the face.

YABU - let DH have some fun with his own car
YANBU - absolutely no need for 3 cars on the drive

OP posts:
PickleAF · 15/07/2021 19:45

Can't you just sell car b? Then you've got a company car and he's got the other one?

Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 19:47

Resale value on car B is quite low as its 11 years old, plus if I don't pass probation at work (another 4 months) I'm back to square 1 looking for a car and last time he had something snazzy he was funny about me using 'his car' even though my no claims record is better than his.

OP posts:
Aprilx · 15/07/2021 19:50

I think buying a new car should have been a joint decision. But I also think he should be able to have a car he likes driving. Selling car b to pay towards new car seems sensible.

Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 19:54

I bought and paid for car B in full, and pay for the tax and maintenance. DH pays for any fuel and the insurance. DH 'hasn't decided' whether he'll insure me on his new car so I am not overly enthusiastic about selling Car B and giving DH the cash

OP posts:
Thehop · 15/07/2021 19:58

Don’t let him out the money from car b towards his new one. It’s yours.

Can you afford to keep car b until your probation is finished?

He’s been an idiot.

EvilPea · 15/07/2021 20:00

Dont sell car b.

I’d be inclined to take him off the insurance so he doesn’t use it for the shit jobs and dump runs. But I’m petty like that - as is he from the sounds of it.

Big purchases (especially loans) should be a joint discussion he’s being a tit.

Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 20:00

I might add that DH's normal commute is 90 miles a day - I have zero objection to him buying whatever car he wants for work once the return to office date has been confirmed and I've passed probation (reviewed in November). I'm annoyed that he's prepared to have a load of debt whilst we are in a somewhat precarious position and he's not actually driving anywhere, plus Car B not being used because he doesn't like it.
His pals have got some pretty flash cars - F Type Jag, Lotus Elise, Merc AMG GT- so it feels like "keeping up with the Jones'".

OP posts:
Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 20:07

I can afford to keep Car B for now, it's the principle of a loan for a car that will sit on the driveway for months I am annoyed about

OP posts:
ForeverSausages · 15/07/2021 20:11

I would be so annoyed. It's like a child saying "I want it and I want it now". Don't get me wrong, if he's doing that sort of a commute he should have a car he likes driving but waiting until November really wouldn't kill him. Especially as he's currently only doing 25 miles a week. I'm annoyed on your behalf.

Although I'm desperate to know what Car B is 😂😂.

Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 20:23

@ForeverSausages gonna out myself here aren't I... A souped-up version of this in a different colour, 5 doors, leather seats and Bluetooth... So it's not exactly crap!

Car trouble
OP posts:
EvilPea · 15/07/2021 20:30

Knobber.
That’s x months of payments he could have stashed towards it. He’ll be up shit creek if they change their commute or working pattern.

SmokeyDevil · 15/07/2021 20:36

[quote Horseyhorsey3]@ForeverSausages gonna out myself here aren't I... A souped-up version of this in a different colour, 5 doors, leather seats and Bluetooth... So it's not exactly crap![/quote]
Isn't that an alfa? Can't tell as its a bit blurry on my phone, but if it's an alfa, it is crap actually. Alfas are well known to rarely work. He couldn't have bought a worse car, considering his friend's have jags, lotus, mercs etc.

SmokeyDevil · 15/07/2021 20:38

Misread that it's car b. But still alfas are shite. A family members owns one and I have no idea why, the stupid thing is never out of the garage. What did he buy to replace that?

User0ne · 15/07/2021 20:39

God that's such a boring car!

He could have had his choice of 11 year old hot hatches for a fraction of the price (probably bought outright) and some much flasher too.

In our house all debt is mutually agreed. We regularly change cars but not spent more than £1300. We've had loads of convertibles, sports cars, super cruisers, hot hatches etc leather, heated seats, blah blah blah.

Of course he's bu

Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 20:42

@SmokeyDevil the Alfa is Car B - it's in perfect working order, 167bhp,has been serviced regularly and on time, new timing belt and water pump 6 months ago. Absolutely fine for a little runaround to a play centre and swimming pool less than 5 miles from home.
Outing myself further here, DH has owned multiple Alfas in his time, he's just decided he doesn't like this one 🙄

OP posts:
Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 20:46

He's buying a "performance" German brand hot hatch... 10 a penny, just asking for it to be nicked as welk as a lot of these types of cars are stolen to order around here

OP posts:
ForeverSausages · 15/07/2021 20:59

Oooooo surely he's not buying a Golf? Or Audi? Sorry not meaning to make you out yourself. I'll swap my 15 year old Fiesta for your Alfa? 😉😂

EvilPea · 15/07/2021 21:00

@Horseyhorsey3

He's buying a "performance" German brand hot hatch... 10 a penny, just asking for it to be nicked as welk as a lot of these types of cars are stolen to order around here
I know exactly what he’s bought. You’ll now have the keys in a tin and the dilemma of do you leave them easy to find or risk being woken for them. And he will be back in your beautiful Alfa the morning after wondering how much he’s going to have to pay to insure his next car.

Yours is much more interesting to drive and you can leave it in the supermarket car park without worrying about it.

SmokeyDevil · 15/07/2021 21:00

[quote Horseyhorsey3]@SmokeyDevil the Alfa is Car B - it's in perfect working order, 167bhp,has been serviced regularly and on time, new timing belt and water pump 6 months ago. Absolutely fine for a little runaround to a play centre and swimming pool less than 5 miles from home.
Outing myself further here, DH has owned multiple Alfas in his time, he's just decided he doesn't like this one 🙄[/quote]
Yeah it's fine for that, but trying to use it for long daily journeys will likely be a nightmare.

But yeah a common German car is still nothing on the jags, lotus etc. He'd have been better off with the alfa. Grin

EvilPea · 15/07/2021 21:03

I had one of the highly nicked audis for work for a while. Beautiful, fast, the engine noise piped in was nice, but actually, incredibly boring. It was predictable, safe, planted. But fucking boring and I didn’t sleep properly with it on the drive.

lanthanum · 15/07/2021 21:03

@Horseyhorsey3

I bought and paid for car B in full, and pay for the tax and maintenance. DH pays for any fuel and the insurance. DH 'hasn't decided' whether he'll insure me on his new car so I am not overly enthusiastic about selling Car B and giving DH the cash
If he were to investigate, he might find that the insurance is cheaper if he does include you. Our insurance went down when my husband rang them to add me the day after I passed my test.
Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 21:03

Precisely!

OP posts:
Original poster
Horseyhorsey3 · 15/07/2021 21:05

Quote fail @EvilPea, precisely!! All of your points I agree with

OP posts:
EvilPea · 15/07/2021 21:36

@SmokeyDevil

Misread that it's car b. But still alfas are shite. A family members owns one and I have no idea why, the stupid thing is never out of the garage. What did he buy to replace that?
Because they are beautiful inside and out, and when they work (the newer ones are far removed from the old ones for reliability) they are something truly special.
Shade17 · 15/07/2021 21:59

Because they are beautiful inside and out, and when they work (the newer ones are far removed from the old ones for reliability) they are something truly special.

In this case it’s a MiTo though, less “truly special” more “sack of shit”. Basically it’s a Fiat Grande Punto.