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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want DD to go to Thorpe Park?

233 replies

demo2026 · 15/07/2021 19:26

DD is 15, it is her last day at school tomorrow before the summer holidays. One of the days next week, she wants to go to Thorpe Park with her friends, 2 other girls and one boy. They're all 15, the boy said he's going to pay as his parents are giving him some money.

The problem is, his parents won't be there so it'll be just them. I'm not really comfortable as they're all only 15.

Am I being too overprotective and I should let her go? What are other peoples opinions on this?

OP posts:
GreyhoundG1rl · 16/07/2021 20:24

@marktayloruk

Let her go of course. And if someone else is willing to pay be glad!
How grabby.
BitterestPill · 16/07/2021 20:34

@demo2026 I'm EXACTLY the same as you, people say oo ya too over protective etc etc, I say whatever Trevor, you raise your kids and I'll raise mine. We had a very similar scenario and I just couldn't do it, so we compromised, I drove them down, they all went in, then I took my younger son in and we had really good quality time while my daughter was having loads of fun with her mates, I saw them from a distance a couple of times but that was it. We were all happy with the situation, we agreed to meet at the car at the time my daughter and her mates decided, job was a goodun.

I'm still the same now and she is in her final year of school and planning to join the Army, hasn't done her any harm, me being over protective!

Sandinmyknickers · 16/07/2021 20:39

15?! Of course I would let her go. What group of 15 year old go to Thorpe Park with an adult in tow? And yes, I used to travel on the train with friends to Thorpe Park at 15. My parents never had a car (london) and I really think all this 'dropping off' business when there are perfectly viable public transport options is a bit silly after a certain age. She's got to learn to take a train at some point!!!

clarehhh · 16/07/2021 20:42

I would let mine go at 12 or 13

Sandinmyknickers · 16/07/2021 20:44

[quote BitterestPill]@demo2026 I'm EXACTLY the same as you, people say oo ya too over protective etc etc, I say whatever Trevor, you raise your kids and I'll raise mine. We had a very similar scenario and I just couldn't do it, so we compromised, I drove them down, they all went in, then I took my younger son in and we had really good quality time while my daughter was having loads of fun with her mates, I saw them from a distance a couple of times but that was it. We were all happy with the situation, we agreed to meet at the car at the time my daughter and her mates decided, job was a goodun.

I'm still the same now and she is in her final year of school and planning to join the Army, hasn't done her any harm, me being over protective![/quote]
OK but OP is posting for opinions, so people aren't just butting in with their unsolicited opinion on 'how to raise her kids'

I'm glad you had a nice day out with your family. Thats OK too.

I'm glad your DD is doing well..but if she hasn't left school yet, it's perhaps a bit early to wade in on whether being overprotective or not was a good choice in terms of raising an independent adult.... (FYI I'm sure she will be fine and you've done an excellent job..it's just a bit of an odd point to make, that's all)

WildJelly · 16/07/2021 20:56

How much is the entrance fee? I can't be that much. I would make sure tickets are booked in advance and pay for DD.

Harls1969 · 16/07/2021 21:04

It's hard to let them go isn't it OP? But sometimes you have to give them the freedom. At 15 I used to regularly look after my 5 year old sister and new baby brother for several hours at a time. At weekends I would often be drinking in the local football club bar (it was the 80s, if you put a bit of makeup on you'd always get served!). I hope they have a lovely time and you will win valuable mum points

Tigger1895 · 16/07/2021 21:16

No, you are not being unreasonable but there comes a time to let her do things. I’ve felt the same many times and I’m on child number 3, you need to let go and trust her to do the right thing. The anxiety you feel is normal and won’t go away anytime soon however she needs independence and you need to cut the apron strings. Wishing you luck

pam290358 · 16/07/2021 22:20

A bit overprotective I think. I think the pandemic has made us all over anxious, but at 15 I don’t think it’s unreasonable for her to want to spend time with friends, unsupervised.

Toomuchtrouble4me · 16/07/2021 23:11

Of course she should go! She’s 15 in a theme park! My DD started weekend working in a theme park at 16!

Mamanyt · 16/07/2021 23:26

Other than making sure she has money to get home on in case there SHOULD be something uncomfortable for her (which I really highly doubt, but is always a good rule of thumb), let the girl go. It's a lovely, low-key way to let her get a bit of independence. It is during the day, with friends that she knows, only one boy in the group...Let her go, and wish her a wonderful time!

MumofSpud · 16/07/2021 23:34

My DD (15) has been going regularly with her friends to Thorpe Park for the last year or so.
At pick up time the car park is full of parents waiting for their teens (similar ages!)

ChubbyLittleManInACampervan · 17/07/2021 08:05

Yes, all boys that age (and girls too Grin) can be a bit silly

But let her have this adventure

All our teens have somewhat arrested development after the last year, so instead of gradually acquiring independence, it comes as a bit of a jump

But it sounds fun!

Let her go

I am letting my DS (16) go out with friends, some of whom are girls, and some of whom are 15, and the kids all look after eachother

Purpl · 17/07/2021 08:46

Hi I was scared too but there is so much undercover security at Thorpe park they will be fine. Why not drive them there? I sat in one of the restaurants with loads of other mums abs worked all day on my laptop when did was 13. Alternatively habe a day out in nearby town so you close on hand. Bugs hugs been there with anxiety worrying too. Margate another place that has worried me !

queenbee72 · 17/07/2021 09:10

@JustWonderingIfYou

15 years old?

Gosh, you sound slightly over protective. I'd say its normal for 12year olds to go around thorpe Park alone. She's practically an adult, do you not trust her for some reason?

Do you baby her in other ways? Probably not helpful in the long run tbh, give her some independence.

Sorry - this is so condescending. Everyone has differing views on risk and the OP was after advice not a bashing on her child raising skills. I personally would have a dilemma too but would be looking for reassurance.
Hillary4 · 17/07/2021 09:34

You're right to worry. A coach driver taking England fans to the final said one gut on the coach boasted he thought he had covid, but got his wife to do the test and it was negative. Next day the 55 year old double jabbed driver is in hospital with covid. That is the sort of people the government don't believe exist, keep telling us people will do the right thing.....like Cummings and Hancock! Care for your child and keep her safe, others may not

SmidgenofaPigeon · 17/07/2021 09:37

@Hillary17 what does that have to do with a few teenagers enjoying themselves outdoors at a theme park Confused

SmidgenofaPigeon · 17/07/2021 09:37

Sorry, I meant @Hillary4 Hmm

bemusedmoose · 17/07/2021 10:31

I was about that age when I went to Chessington with friends. Took a few trains. Had a great day eating too much sugar and having a laugh.

My son is 15 and I would let him go. I've taken him and friends to lego land when younger. We've gone in as a group but they have been allowed more freedom to go on the bigger rides and meet up at a time and place while I take the smaller ones on other rides.

fartandsnap · 17/07/2021 10:34

@Hillary4 considering it takes an absolute minimum of 2 days for symptoms to appear after exposure to the virus, I find that story hard to believe. If the driver was in hospital with covid the next day, he was the one who actually put others at risk of catching the virus.
Also agree with @SmidgenofaPigeon it has nothing to do with the thread!
OP - let her go to Thorpe park, it is fine. I went on holiday on my own with friends at that age!

SmidgenofaPigeon · 17/07/2021 10:51

@Hillary4 yeah also, that sounds like complete bollocks.

sue69m · 17/07/2021 11:15

Have kids not dealt with enough over the last 18 months?? LET HER GO & HAVE FUN

Lockdownbear · 17/07/2021 11:26

I'd think the other girls have pulled out or the parents have said No over the price of tickets.
However even if it is just the two of them I think they'd be fine.

hopingforabrighterfuture2021 · 17/07/2021 11:37

My 12 year old goes with her friend or friends on their own. Hmm We drop them off, they have phones and we are not too far away. Honestly, at 15 I think unless there’s a back story, (haven’t RTFT) you are being very overprotective!

toastantea · 17/07/2021 13:38

@Hillary4

You're right to worry. A coach driver taking England fans to the final said one gut on the coach boasted he thought he had covid, but got his wife to do the test and it was negative. Next day the 55 year old double jabbed driver is in hospital with covid. That is the sort of people the government don't believe exist, keep telling us people will do the right thing.....like Cummings and Hancock! Care for your child and keep her safe, others may not
If the coach driver was hospitalised the day after then he already had covid when driving the coach the day before.

Is this your own tale or shite from Facebook?

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