AIBU to have asked my neighbour for milk!!

[IAmMeThisIsI]

I'm very low on money. I found some tea bags and sugar in a cupboard and realized I had no milk!

I haven't had a cuppa for days. So...I asked my neighbour for some milk over the garden fence. I feel like a peasant scumbag now!

She gave me some. And generously let me keep the cup it's come in!

Now I just feel AWFUL! Like some beggar. I feel I shouldn't have asked?

Idk if I was unreasonable to ask or if I'm being precious about getting embarrassed because she said yes! Argh!

Feel free to tell me I'm over reacting or that I shouldn't have done it!

I do plan on returning the cup with some milk in later today when I get food finally delivered...or shouldn't I?

Am I being an overreacting dick?

I've been asked for various things over the years, milk, sugar, a loo roll, a cigarette, never thought anything of it and have asked neighbours for things in return a couple of times. Just part of being neighbourly as far as I'm concerned, hope you enjoyed your cuppa OP

Not odd to ask for the milk. Very odd to insist you keep the cup as well!

On our street there is a constant back and forth of texts asking to borrow things - garlic cloves, milk, sugar - all sorts of things.
We also always split large things (this week, a water melon) which might go off before one small family could eat them alone. And we also share the things we've grown in our gardens. My husband is currently making apricot jam, from the fruit of our tree, to share with neighbors. We also all circulate cookies at Christmas and, once a year, have a street-party pot-luck. We live in the very center of a US city with not the best reputation (if you've watched The Wire, you'll know) but it is actually a lovely, friendly place to live, and the kindness and sharing between neighbors is a big part of it.
So glad you had a good neighbor. And definitely don't feel bad.

@Ruthietuthie

On our street there is a constant back and forth of texts asking to borrow things - garlic cloves, milk, sugar - all sorts of things. We also always split large things (this week, a water melon) which might go off before one small family could eat them alone. And we also share the things we've grown in our gardens. My husband is currently making apricot jam, from the fruit of our tree, to share with neighbors. We also all circulate cookies at Christmas and, once a year, have a street-party pot-luck. We live in the very center of a US city with not the best reputation (if you've watched The Wire, you'll know) but it is actually a lovely, friendly place to live, and the kindness and sharing between neighbors is a big part of it. So glad you had a good neighbor. And definitely don't feel bad.

That sounds fab...

I'm always borrowing things from my neighbours, and them us: eggs, clingfilm, milk, sugar, cake tins, coals for BBQ etc. It's part of the joy of living in a nice community.

Your neighbour won't be judging or assuming about your financial situation, probably just thinks you've run out.

If I ever run out of milk I just have it black. I would be too embarrassed to ask for milk but each to their own.

We share stuff on our street all the time - last week our neighbour called us asking if we had any apples - her young child was having a total meltdown because they didn't have any and she was desperate. We had a chuckle between us because that's something our child would do, and promptly delivered an apple!

I used to live on a street where everybody was really friendly,and they would often knock on the door to lend tea bag ,milk, cup of sugar,I also used to help a single dad put with electricity ect,we moved a few years ago to a village and it's the one thing I miss the most!! Keep the cup & enjoy your cuppa and don't over think it

If a neighbour asked me for some milk,I'd just give them milk. I wouldn't question their finances or anything like that, nor would I assume they were beggars. I'd just think they'd ran out and couldn't pop to the shop straight away. Don't think anything more on it op. They sound like a lovely neighbour.

Yes you are over-reacting but not a dick. Everyone where I live borrows stuff and if they didn't I still would. When I lived in social housing we were all up shit creek and there was a lady who'd come round once a week asking for bread milk and nappies, always gave her something (although her face once when I gave her skimmed milk was a picture!)

To me this is normal. I love to help people. I’m always sharing our surplus veg with the neighbours.

If I can help to lend something I always will.

I would love to help out a neighbour with something so little!

I actually love it if a neighbour asks a favour. It means I don't have to feel bad if I need one from them!

My neighbour asked to borrow my spare fridge the other day (I bought an old one from FB a couple of years ago when I was hosting loads of extended family that Christmas, and keep it in the garage) and her DH helped put up a new curtain rail for me a few months ago.
I was relieved that she asked about the fridge, as that curtain rail job proved bigger than I thought!

Not weird. My neighbour texted a few months ago asking if she could have some eggs because she was doing some baking with her grandson and didn’t have any. I didn’t think anything of it. She’s given me things in the past when I haven’t even asked, just offered it because it’s nice to do. They do have money problems as she’s talked to me about it quite a bit, but it doesn’t make me think any less of her.

Well, I’m relieved to see we’ve had no posts with a condescending over-the-glasses comments about managing money and budgeting, which I had very much expected.

Don’t worry OP. It sounds like she was happy to help, as most people would be.

If my neighbour asked I wouldn't think anything of it, just that she'd run out of milk and was gagging for a brew. Perfectly normal.

Hope you have some support

My auntie used to say "If someone brings you a pot of soup, never return the pot empty." Meaning put something in the (cleaned) pot before you return it.

So why not put something like a little chocolate bar in the cup when you give it back to your neighbour? Would that make you feel better?

PS no need to feel uncomfortable for asking. My neighbour has occasionally asked me for some sugar or whatever, and I never thought anything of it.

Overwhelmed with how kind people are being and supportive towards this. I feel fine about it now. I might give her some chocolate as a gift of thanks. But thanks everyone for your replies! I was being silly! Lol xx

on my estate we always have people borrowing and lending stuff. Its a part of being in a community 😁

When i was growing up on the kind of estate channel 4 make earnest documentaries about (it did feature in one actually) we had some amazing neighbours. When my dad was on strike in the 80s one neighbour used to buy me and my brother a mix up and leave a bag of bread, milk, beans and soup on the doorstep every week.

As a funny story, we also used to have the sort of family the Daily Mail loves to hate next door for a time until they were evicted. They were awful, tried to complain that our dog bit them when they were trying to steal stuff from the garden (no really, they actually did). One Sunday they knocked to ask if we had some flour they could borrow. 5 minutes later, asked for a couple of eggs. A few minutes after that some milk, then some potatoes, then did we have any carrots. My Mam ended up shouting across the garden did they want our bloody chicken as well since they'd asked for the entire bloody Sunday dinner! So asking for a bit of milk for a brew is absolutely fine 🤣