Dealing with a difficult colleague

[Serenachacha]

I might be overly harsh, as she may just be trying to do well in her new role and make a good impression.
She’s been here for around 3 weeks and I’ve been here for 2 months roughly.
The very first time I worked with her I admit I didn’t have the greatest impression as they were watching Love Island and slagging off the girls, calling one ugly, saying another had an irritating voice etc. Coming from a woman in her forties slagging off 20 year olds.
Then I overheard her talking about a colleague in a previous job saying that she had not got on with her and “She spoke to me like that, I would have knocked her out”.

She’s new here but has a lot of previous experience in different roles.

She told me “Has the manager told you that we’re doing X in a different way from now on.”
Then before she told me that we had to fill in X form. As I have geek here longer I knew that x form was only for another team. I told her this kindly and she just said “No it’s for us.”
I said again firmly “It isn’t, it’s for the other team.” And explained why.

When I completed a task before she said “and did you make sure to do xyz ?”

I was doing 2 jobs separately and each time she rushed over and said I’ll do it I’ll do it. It could be trying to be nice but I saw it as trying to control.

Plus when I was doing my first job she corrected me “No, we aren’t allowed to use that here.”
I admit I had never been told about it, but it’s this I know everything attitude that is really irritating. I feel like it’s aimed at me too for some reason. She isn’t in a senior position to me either. Other times she’s nice, so I don’t understand.

I could see myself getting irritated and short before so I had to bite my tongue. Luckily I’m leaving soon but I’ll have to work with her again before then. Am I being overly harsh? I’ve never got this from other colleagues, even senior staff.

Tell the colleague you like to work with the team and they'll probably get the hint.
Use your own words.

Been here not geek !* lol

I just don’t see her speaking to other colleagues like that, especially senior ones. But again she’s nice sometimes so then I feel a little bad.

You're leaving after 3 months? Are you sure the problem is her and not you?

That’s a bit unnecessary and rude. Sometimes people leave jobs early on for various reasons, there’s nothing wrong with that.

She sounds like a nasty piece of work. Just bide your time and try to grin and bear it until you leave. Grey rock her.

It sounds like she not a very nice person but it also sounds like you’ve got some of the processes wrong as well and are annoyed that she’s been the one to notice and tell you.
If you’re leaving just grim and bear it for the next month.

I may have got some things wrong. I don’t mind being told but some of the things she was saying, I knew for a fact they were wrong and despite me telling her she wouldn’t accept my version.
It’s just the very know it all attitude, and behaving as if she is a senior when she is on the same level as me.
Before I was dressing an elderly resident and she burst in and asked me to hurry up as she needed help somewhere. It’s rude and also disrespects the privacy of the resident.

All you can do in a situation like this is nod, thank her for the information rather than argue about it, but go and check the facts for yourself.

As you recognised she got it right some of the time but wrong some of the time. It isn't a big deal, she sounds a bit annoying but as you're leaving anyway just let it go, don't let it rile you.

I agree that she shouldn't have burst in on the resident. If you were staying in the role I would let her know that, but don't lock horns with her and get involved in an argument. You could check she's had the necessary training, but training doesn't cover every single scenario, some of it is having the right temperament for a caring role and it sounds like she isn't there yet. Not your problem to fix.

Its her not you . Don't be fooled she is not nice, she is trying to put you down to make herself feel.important . Grin and bear it until you leave

She’s been in the role for 20 years prior to working here apparently and used to be at a senior level. But at our workplace she is employed at the same level as me. I have worked at that place longer than she has and I have an understanding of how things work there, it is really not for her to question me.
We have another lady who has only started a week ago, but hasn’t been questioned in the same way.
If I were so bad, I’m sure other colleagues would have commented on it or reported it, but a few people have said I am doing well.
I’ve had it before. I’d been doing well for a couple of months then suddenly a new senior arrived and everything I did was wrong, and pointed out in front of everyone.
Will just try to grin and bear it, it won’t be for much longer. It’s her problem.

What I noticed with both her and the senior I used to work with, when I met them both their hellos were a bit cold. There was no nice to meet you or anything, just sensed something off and cold.

We have someone like this, although she worked for a different building of the company before coming to work for us. Within a couple of days of starting (I've been here years) she tried telling me what to do. Then it was asking me if I'd done my work and if I'd put X information in it. I gave her a sickly sweet smile and said "It's ok, you don't have to worry about me. I know how to do MY job." She hasn't tried me since then.

Well you have only been there three weeks or so longer than her, so hardly much more? I can't see why you're getting so worked up if you are only staying another few weeks.

That sounds awful, they really have a cheek. Sadly as I’m quiet and shy I tend to be a target for arseholes.
It’s just very telling how she didn’t try it with the girl who’s even newer.

I’ve been there for a few months. I’m not getting worked up, I’m asking for advice on how to deal with a stressful situation.

There really isn't much difference in how long you've both worked there, her 3 weeks, you 2 months, so you don't have an advanced level of knowledge or seniority in the position.

I don't really understand why you would be so invested in what appears to be a temporary job. Just keep doing what you need to do for the next couple of weeks and move on to the next job.

The question I’m asking is how to deal with her behaviour. Obviously I’m invested in something I’m currently dealing with most days even though I know it is temporary.

I didn’t suggest at all I had seniority. I’m saying that she is speaking to me as if I don’t know things, even though I started before her.

How you deal with her behaviour, is to ignore it. Ride it out.

Over you career, you will encounter others like her. Treat this as a learning experience. Learn to quietly stand your ground, and not give this woman so much brainspace.

You're in your twenties, I'm guessing?

I know I should ignore but I’m a sensitive person. That’s why I hate the dismissive get over it attitude that some people have on here. We aren’t all as strong, I’m 30 and I’ve had a couple of them before, it’s like being back in high school. Anyway my new role is mainly lone working which im very glad for. I guess I’ll have to keep going and try to ignore her.

When I have worked with the actual seniors they have guided me and explained things but in a professional manner. Because that’s their job, not a peer who has no seniority and who is making me feel micromanaged.

@Serenachacha

I know I should ignore but I’m a sensitive person. That’s why I hate the dismissive get over it attitude that some people have on here. We aren’t all as strong, I’m 30 and I’ve had a couple of them before, it’s like being back in high school. Anyway my new role is mainly lone working which im very glad for. I guess I’ll have to keep going and try to ignore her.

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