To not like my child after school

[mintaerobrownie]

My lovely DS is an absolute horror after school, tired, cries at anything, very short tempered and hits his sister, shouts in her face. I tell him off and he cries more. Sobs if I ask him to say sorry and refuses.

He perks up after dinner and seems happy. He's an absolute angel at school ( reception) seems to be doing well, is quite a tale teller to the teacher if anyone is being naughty. And at the weekends no problems with behaviour at all. So is it just tiredness?

I just told him he can't watch TV due to hitting his sister ( who's 1) and he's sobbing on the sofa 😭 I try everyday to be positive and loving after school and we went to get an icecream, but then the poor behaviour starts when we get home. It's been the same all school year 🥺 His sister is demanding and I do acknowledge that could be part of it.

My 3 were like this, they are 10,12 and 14 and the first thing they do when they get home from school is have a snack and then have an hour to wind down. We don’t start homework till at least 4:30 just to let them decompress.

Giving a high sugar snack is pouring petrol on the fire. Give him a cheese sandwich to eat on the way home.

He's hangry! I used to pick mine up armed with a carton of juice and a cereal bar.

When ds started full time nursery I used to put a banana on the seat of his pushchair for pick up. He would fly out of the door, knocking kids over in the process to get to his banana. All the other kids would look for their parents at the door, mine would look for his snack!

I was late for pick up once because I forgot the banana and had to go back. I was too scared to show up without it. I explained it to his teacher when I apologised for being late and she said I made the right decision!

My children are like this still and they are 7 and 9! The 9 year old is still like it!

So true that they 'use up' compliance - imagine being on your best behaviour for 6 hours, they don't get enough exercise or playtime - (sad reality) - they are being asked to do tasks they find boring but they are well behaved so dont respond negatively.

Its shit for them really. I actually think after school club/ childminder etc is better as they then take it out elsehwere !

I LOATHE this time of day.

Actually you are in the bit I found toughest - my energetic boy in Year 2 was monstrous after school - the learning is tough, very formal lots of writing etc and he loathed it. I think sometimes as parents we don't wnat to think about how crap the school system is - but for a lot of children it's not that great an experience.

My son got a lot better as he got to about year 3/ 4 - he was just more capable of the work - in year 2 it was like a constant stress for him.

Oooh we had this for years. Years. I’d drag them back screaming, and throw dinner into them as quickly as possible. We never ever had afterschool play dates.

Some people also give them a bath straight after if it’s too early for dinner. That calms them a bit.

They are tired out when they get home from school. Give him a snack which combines protein and starch ( peanut butter sandwich, cheese finger and a banana, drink of milk) to tide him over till teatime.

Don't offer sugary drink/sweets as a sugar high won;t help.

@2bazookas

They are tired out when they get home from school. Give him a snack which combines protein and starch ( peanut butter sandwich, cheese finger and a banana, drink of milk) to tide him over till teatime. Don't offer sugary drink/sweets as a sugar high won;t help.

This, plus a small drink if you are not too far from the nearest available loo. Being dehydrated doesn't help.

Also, avoid asking them 'how was school? Try just listening out for what they might want to tell you...

that way you find out a lot.

And yes to snack in hand at the school gate.

Agree with others, give food. My DC needs a substantial mini-meal with plenty of carbs such as sandwiches / pancakes /slab of cake / cereal, along with a fruit and maybe a milky drink. Preferably sitting quietly to absorb the stresses of the day.

Couple of crumpets and some milk did the trick with DS. It's a long time from lunch and the afternoon is usually very full of activities. Pop him in the bath away from Dd for a bit and you'll bring him round nicely.

Note, DS not averse to this now and is 15.

@Jmaho

My eldest who is now 11 was like this when he started school. Still is if I'm honest. His very lovely nursery (school based) teacher told me to always bring a biscuit to pick up and it always worked for us. I don't do it now he's older

Ahem, wait for the teenage growth spurt . All through high school, our teenagers ALL needed a major refuelling straight off the school bus, and as they got bigger so did the size of the "snack". This was in addition to three full cooked meals per day and a bowl of cereal at bedtime. They were all very energetic, lanky and skinny with hollow legs.