Queen Ethelburga school and sex abuse

[BatmansBat]

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.yorkshirepost.co.uk/news/crime/owner-of-york-boarding-school-queen-ethelburgas-jailed-for-historical-sexual-abuse-of-pupils-3295138%3famp

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9754347/amp/Millionaire-businessman-bought-37-000-year-boarding-school-abuse-pupils-jailed.html

Ok, so I am really cross that the previous thread got deleted. It had a lot of helpful links. This concerns child abuse and safeguarding and I am still aghast that this can happen.

A predatory male buys a boarding school (allegedly through various holding companies)

he installs somewhere between 500 and 700 cameras around the building, including in areas where children get changed

he abuses children

his lawyer threatens to sue MN when women tried to discuss anything negative about the school

He got appointed to Chairman of the Governors which meant that he could help write the safeguarding policies.

He managed to get off from charges the first time

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-york-north-yorkshire-44785825.amp

How can this be allowed to happen? As parents we need to know that our children are safe. I think this should be used as an example of how important all safeguarding principles are!

To be honest, I don’t know where to post anymore. . I thought that safeguarding in general now was feminist chat but that if it was safeguarding which touched upon self ID it needed to go in sex and gender.

I am happy for this thread to be moved to chat if you think it will reach a larger audience @Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g

?

@drspouse

Oh I misread it as being in "sex and gender" but yes, it should be in AIBU or In the News or just Chat.

Oh yes! I misread it too. It's because it says sex and gender underneath.

Should I ask to have the thread moved? Where to?

@BatmansBat

Should I ask to have the thread moved? Where to?

Aibu gets the most traffic.

It really needs to be seen as a warning to parents.

@BatmansBat, sorry, I thought this was one of the threads that's been moved to Feminism (Chat or Sex/Gender) from AIBU or Chat. I'm not sure Mumsnet would move it the other way, but it might be worth asking. Wasn't criticising you, quite the reverse - you're doing sterling work bringing attention to both these awful cases!

Do you always have to have an AIBU question in the opening post?

Because if so, mine would be why wasn't this picked up sooner? There were clearly rumours, even from people who worked there. Where exactly are the safeguarding failures?

I have asked if I could have it moved to AIBU. I have three children and this upsets me so much. I think we all need to be so much more vigilant when it comes to safeguarding our children. There are so many predators out there.

Sometimes people think that some are untouchable (white, rich, owner of a school) and actually they may be the worst. As parents we cannot let it slide for a minute.

@BatmansBat

I have asked if I could have it moved to AIBU. I have three children and this upsets me so much. I think we all need to be so much more vigilant when it comes to safeguarding our children. There are so many predators out there.

Sometimes people think that some are untouchable (white, rich, owner of a school) and actually they may be the worst. As parents we cannot let it slide for a minute.

Indeed. And this was going on for decades. Clearly in some kind of group.

It's reasonable to assume there are more.

I just started a thread about another school, also in Feminist Chat. A ballet school where the son of the owner/principal abused young ballerinas for years. It was also silenced. People came forward and nobody took notice

Thank you so much MNHQ.

For anyone joining the thread now, this is the second horrific story of sex abuse at school I have come across in the past two days. There is a separate thread in feminist chat where the son of the owner/principal (38) systematically abused 16-year old girls over a sustained period of time.

Both these schools were shutting down all discussion and rumour we’re going around for years. All that time, children were being abused.

The QE school in this thread even threatened any posters on MN with legal action and managed to get several threads deleted.

AIBU to think that women on MN want to read about this and learn from it so we are better equipped to protect our children?

YANBU at all. I don't know if @Talkinpeace is still here but if so she must feel vindicated now for her refusal to withdraw her posts about this place in the face of legal threats years ago.

I haven't seen Talkinpeace for a while.

She talked a lot of sense, as well as peace if I remember.

I missed the original threads. I am flabbergasted that a man can

a) buy a school,
b) put himself in a position responsible for safeguarding
c) film the children changing,
d) abuse children
e) silence all discussion about the school

It is like some dystopian nightmare. I don’t know what we as parents can do to make this more difficult for the predators out there?

Datun, the cameras were allegedly in the classrooms, not the changing rooms. But then some children were always changing in the class rooms…. funny that

I find this really upsetting, to be honest. It's the manipulation. Knowing that CCTV in the changing room would be tricky to implement, he simply changes the nature of the classroom into a changing room.

The plotting, planning, manipulation, determination and commitment to carry out his sex crimes is sickening. Together with enough money to frighten people off from asking questions. For years and years.

This is why safeguarding needs a bigger platform, in my opinion. It needs to be something that people are constantly praised for and greeted with enthusiasm.

Not something that people find tedious at best, and insulting at worst.

Another one OP, Ampleforth
www.thetimes.co.uk/article/ampleforth-college-the-catholic-school-in-child-abuse-scandal-fails-new-ofsted-inspection-gv5w2tw9x

www.theguardian.com/education/2020/nov/28/pupils-barred-ampleforth-college-catholic-school-abuse-scandal

@OhHolyJesus that is truly horrific. How can any parent allow that to happen in plain sight no less!

@SpaceRaiders I need to watch the documentary again but I remember how gaslit both the children and the parents were. Nassir would pretend that some kind of spinal or pelvic realignment had to be done internally, sometimes the girls would see him more than once a day.

For this one situation with the mother, she was the same side of the curtain as Nassir and her daughter, he positioned himself between her and her child so he could do it whilst she was right there. I think I recall that correctly, it was that or she was the other side of the curtain.

The documentary is a hard watch but important as it examines the regulatory body and those involved who protected Nassir for a very long time.

I have no idea about Mr Martin and who knew, or suspected, but if whistleblowers aren't going to be listened to then children will always be at risk.

Datun, I agree. Safeguarding must be at the forefront of people’s minds and we need to campaign for that to happen. Children are vulnerable and especially so in any environment where they trust adults. Some predators will go to any lengths. We cannot afford to let anyone avoid safeguarding considerations.

BlankTimes, that is shocking. So many schools. It makes be absolutely sick to think of these children.

I will post a link to yet another school here. Please everyone be careful not to speculate on this last school. The trial is upcoming. We need to stick to published facts only.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8621227/amp/Ballet-school-rocked-sex-abuse-probe-SIXTY-victims-come-forward.html

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/stage/2020/aug/25/scottish-ballet-west-school-closes-allegations-sexual-misconduct

For this one situation with the mother, she was the same side of the curtain as Nassir and her daughter, he positioned himself between her and her child so he could do it whilst she was right there. I think I recall that correctly, it was that or she was the other side of the curtain.

There's no way the transgression in plain sight isn't a big fat arousal in its own right.

@SpaceRaiders , I don’t think any parent “allowed this to happen”. That is a little bit the point of this thread.

It is easy to trust seemingly kind and professional adults as parents. We trust the headmistress, the headmaster and the teachers, especially if they appear charming, professional or make us feel stupid for not trusting them.

The problem is that we can never know. There are three schools (with sex abuse) one with multiple teachers only on this thread.

In many instances, some parents were shouting from the roof tops but got silenced. Other people didn’t believe them, didn’t want to make a fuss or even felt bad for accusing people of seemingly good standard of something so awful.

And all the time children were being sexually abused. I just want to cry thinking of it.

@OhHolyJesus I feel physically sick just thinking about it.

I recall seeing a documentary which was very similar in that the parents become so enamoured by this powerful, famous person that the appropriate questions to safeguard the child aren’t raised.

Does anyone know which solicitors represented the school or individuals acting on behalf of the school in the communications with MN or MN posters?

Oh god.

You'd think the best thing to do in these circumstances is be open about the failures , and work your arses off to put things into place so these things don't happen ever again.

Not shut down any discussion and make.it impossible to speak out.

Zilla, I think it later transpired to be an in-house lawyer who phrased themselves in a way which made people believe that legal counsel had been taken but I could be mistaken. Threads were deleted and the ones that remained was a sinister read with posters redacting their posts due to legal threats.

@BatmansBat I was really referring to OhHolyJesus and her post on Nassir.

I just can’t for the life of me comprehend how a child can be abused in the manner that has been described. And what spinal exam takes place internally? Perhaps I’m just very cynical hence why I would question absolutely everything.